(no subject)
today as I was pulling away from my parking spot where I spet an entire lunch hour chainsmoking and drinking red bull I saw that the car next to me had a Jersey plate. ironic.
trying to put the pieces together to this impossible puzzle. I feel like it's all over before it even started.
and why am i so numb? It starts in my brain and lingers down into my arms fingers and toes. as i type this i see the words but i cant feel them. is it really done?
I dont know. I am tired and all i want is to bury my head deep into the pillow till i cant hear my own thoughts, his harsh words and the bitter reality of what really is.
I should have known. you cant love the unloving. you cant hold what is unreachable.
am i still reaching? even now, that i looked him in the face and told him to forget those thoughts of us, to forget the solution, and to leave me alone. I turn around to see if he is chasing after me.
but he's not there.
trying to put the pieces together to this impossible puzzle. I feel like it's all over before it even started.
and why am i so numb? It starts in my brain and lingers down into my arms fingers and toes. as i type this i see the words but i cant feel them. is it really done?
I dont know. I am tired and all i want is to bury my head deep into the pillow till i cant hear my own thoughts, his harsh words and the bitter reality of what really is.
I should have known. you cant love the unloving. you cant hold what is unreachable.
am i still reaching? even now, that i looked him in the face and told him to forget those thoughts of us, to forget the solution, and to leave me alone. I turn around to see if he is chasing after me.
but he's not there.