5: action

[steadfastest]

[Xander can be found inside the Battle Dome today. Observers might look in and see a dark, murky graveyard inside the simulator. Bare trees, tombs, crypts and stones provide a jagged landscape for the lone young man inside, who looks---afraid. He's got an axe on his back, a stake in each hand, and a big lump in his throat

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[slaying]

What the--?

[Checking out the Battle Dome--specifically any potential application it could have in managing the combat school--and Buffy comes across a...graveyard. Oh, yay. Her favourite kind of place to hang out.

And that's when she hears the call. Buffy hits the ground running.]

[steadfastest]

[At this point, there are MULTIPLE VAMPS rising all across the cemetery. An eerie moon pierces the clouds and strikes the face of one very pale Xander, the brunette beauty still latched onto his neck. His mouth works soundlessly. His eyes are closed. So if Buffy DOES want to help him? She's going to have to clear through quite an army of undead killers.]

[slaying]

[Luckily she carries that stake everywhere. Unpocketing it, Buffy works her way through the first wave of vamps. Who was ridiculous enough to start up a training regime like this, anyway? She can't even see Xander, yet.]

[steadfastest]

[Xander! Xander would be Ridiculous Guy who was ridiculous enough to be this ridiculous. Although he might have stood a chance, at least with the first vamp, if she hadn't been Cordelia. The female vampire pulls away from him for a moment when she sees Buffy, and hisses.]

She's come to slay us wearing THAT?

[Xander slumps weakly against her, supported by an iron grip. He can speak, but just barely. He glares at the vampire holding him and whispers a warning.]

Don't touch her.

[slaying]

Nice to see the lab-coats can faithfully recreate even her mega-bitchiness.

[A quirk of the eyebrow and Buffy dusts another superfluous vamp, kicking another to the side.] And no sweat--her bark is so so so worse than her bite. But unfortunately for her, I don't think any of it is worse than her earrings.

[Hardly concerned with smacking Xander (her aim's good!), Buffy launches a rough-and-ready fist to the she-vamp's face.]

[steadfastest]

These are real diamonds, beeyotch! At least I'm here to murder people, and not as a pathetic FASHION SUICIDE!

[Cordelia rocks back with the blow and deals one of her own; she WANTS to pin the slayer and give her the fangs-to-the-artery treatment as well.]

[slaying]

And here I was, Cordelia--thinking you couldn't get any more annoying than you were in life.

[If you're paying attention, Xander? You might notice that was a pretty quick use of the past tense, there. Buffy takes vamp-cordelia's blow on the chin and keeps a-throwing them. She has a grudge against the late Chase. Something she learned from Angel, here in Luceti. A long time ago.]

[steadfastest]

[Xander would be paying more attention if he wasn't so greatly exsanguinated, Buffy.

Vamp Cordelia, in the meantime, continues to roll with the punches, which are making her more and more furious. Finally she launches a counterattack, coming at Buffy with full game-face glory.]

Just because I was the only one of you losers who HAD a life, Buffy?

[slaying]

[Forget that you know she dies, Buffy. Forget that you know she ends up winning Captain Forehead's heart. Just...forget.

Slightly distracted, Buffy is (briefly) knocked back. But at least she's keeping him away from Xander. Roundhouse kick for the win, Alex!]

[steadfastest]

[The roundhouse sends Cordy rolling--down but not out. She picks herself up with a growl.]

You'll pay for that, Slayer.

[Xander, meanwhile, is on his hands and knees, groping in the simulated grass for his other stake, one hand pressed to his neck.]

[slaying]

No, I won't. How can I pay for anything in a moneyless world, Chase?

[Buffy probably could have staked the vampire a dozen times by now, but there was something...cathartic about just laying into an enemy and not worrying about whether she would hurt a sparring partner or cause a scene.]

[steadfastest]

You'll pay in blood like the rest of them! I DON'T TAKE CREDIT.

[Cordelia circles, biding her time now, looking for the opportunity to strike. Xander, meanwhile, is trying to stand because there ARE other vampires approaching and he's armed at least with his stake. He still looks confused: this holographic outcome is clearly not what he'd intended.]

[slaying]

[Tired, now, of the charade--Buffy goes in for the final staking. Circling be damned.]

[steadfastest]

[POOF! Up in dust and ash Cordelia the Vampire goes! What's left is a crowd of hungry vamps closing in and Xander looking shellshocked. He somehow gets to his feet and backs toward the exit.]

You want to take them too? Or should I shut this down?

[slaying]

Yeah, let's go for that killswitch. It's not half as satisfying when I know they're not real.

[But she does side-kick one out of their way. God damn vamps.]

[steadfastest]

[Without really paying attention to where he's going or what's in his way, Xander stumbles to the exit and reaches the control console. There he struggles to find the shutoff. Finally, though, he manages it and the room goes dim, the scenario vanishing.]