This is the sound of settling...
i've got a hunger
twisting my stomach into knots
that my tongue was tied off
my brain's repeating
"if you've got an impulse let it out"
but they never make it past my mouth.
baa bah, this is the sound of settling
baa bah, baa bah
(x2)
our youth is fleeting
old age is just around the bend
and i can't wait to go grey
and i'll sit and wonder
of every love that could've been
if i'd only thought of something charming to say.
baa bah, this is the sound of settling
baa bah, baa bah
(x4)
i've got a hunger twisting my stomach into knots.
I'm home for another 2 hours and then we're off into the night, er, morning... We're off. We'll leave it at that. Instead of sleeping and getting just to my REM stage of sleep only to be awakened, I opted to just stay awake and sleep in the car, seeing as how we have an 18 hour car ride ahead of us, and I won't be driving a single mile of it, or for the next 2 1/2 weeks. The beach was amazing. I layed out for one day and got a bit of a tan. I hope I get more while we're camping cause I still have this huge X on my back from when I went to Myrtle with my beloved Amy Bacon. It's getting darker and fading though, so hopefully not too much longer of "X marks the ho."
I've got a lot of growing up to do yet. I realized that while I was at the beach, making myself sleep in until 12 when my room got so hot from the sun that I couldn't bear it cause the power was off leading to a lack of AC. I need to grow up and figure more stuff out and I have a lot of stuff I want ot accomplish this year. The more I think about it, the more I want to switch from Chemistry to Astronomy. It's like an elective cause I have all my science credits, and it seems much more interesting. I really want to do well in school this year. I'm not blowing off my senior year, I messed up way too much last year. This means I've gotta find the right balance of fun and work. Dear Lord help me now.
I want to draw a lot while we're camping. And take lots of pictures. I'm mad at myself for not taking more pictures while in Europe. We're going to some flipping hot places, but they're going to be beautiful, and I never want to forget that. Ever. Plus I really want to get back into drawing. I feel like I've left art on the back burner so far this summer, and I hate that feeling cause art means so much in my life. Heck, it is my life. I neglect it a lot don't I?
I need to stop selling myself short and underestimating myself. I'm sure I've got some great qualities about me, and I act like they don't exist. I need to stop that. Really I do. I need to find some self-confidence for crying out loud. And I will. If it kills me I will.
And there are a few people I really miss right now, but that's okay. I'll be back in a few weeks, we'll hang out. But there are a couple of guys that are kind of sticking out right now. And I need to stop thinking about this crap cause I'm going to start getting all confused. Okay, done with that subject.
I'll miss you guys while I'm gone. I'll also miss work and having my own room and bathroom. Love you guys!!
Laura Seel, I hope everything is okay, and I love you a lot and know what it's like. <33 I'm here for you when I get back if you need anything at all. Stay strong girl!!