torment? or Euphoria..

[staryeyed19]

I dreamt of him last night, in the little sleep I managed to get. I dreamt that everything was fixed...it was like nothing was ever wrong. He was here lying on my futon and we were talking. Just...talking. It was glorious. Then I sat down next to him...and he held me. Just like he use to, just like I've wanted back for so long now. Then I woke up. My night was filled with many different dreams...many mixed messages. Were they trying to give me hope? Or was it just another way that my mind has decided to torture and torment me. None of them made any sense but all of them had some relevance to all the troubles Ive been having, all of them had someone familiar in them...yet this is the only one I remember fully. It felt so real. And yet...even though it is a torture to me...at least I'll always have my dreams to escape to. Even if they depress me later...I will get a little while to escape...to pretend like there are no problems...*sigh*

Now if only sleep wasnt such a scattered thing for me...what wrong with my life!