a glimmer of hope, a sense of longing
This morning I was reminded why I love math so much (and perhaps used to love it so much more): each "field" of mathematics, be it topology, analysis, abstract algebra, whatever, is connected, sometimes obviously and sometimes vaguely, but it's all connected. I don't take math courses with the same frequency as I used to, and the subjects just continue to grow more complicated and obscure, but sometimes there are those "aha!" moments where another cylinder falls into place and you've found the next number on the enormous combination lock of knowledge. Of course, since the combination to open the door is infinitely many numbers long, I'll never get to the end, but there's that same joy in discovering an implication of a connection now as there used to be so long ago. The ever-changing-for-the-worse cost/benefit ratio of this phenomenon is turning my fondness of mathematics in general into a love/hate relationship, but it's not always for nothing, and today I'm reminded of that.
And again, I know that's what I want to do with my life. I want to make the most of the mathematical connections that I do know to impart my knowledge on others, and likely learn from them in the process as they make connections of which I wasn't aware before.
The rush of ecstasy that comes from making that new connection fades more quickly than it used to, though. Math used to be both entertaining and useful, but now that I'm locked into this particular path for my doctorate, more and more of it is proving temporarily useless.
In a parallel time, I chose to obtain a coursework masters in mathematics. I wonder how that me is doing these days.
And again, I know that's what I want to do with my life. I want to make the most of the mathematical connections that I do know to impart my knowledge on others, and likely learn from them in the process as they make connections of which I wasn't aware before.
The rush of ecstasy that comes from making that new connection fades more quickly than it used to, though. Math used to be both entertaining and useful, but now that I'm locked into this particular path for my doctorate, more and more of it is proving temporarily useless.
In a parallel time, I chose to obtain a coursework masters in mathematics. I wonder how that me is doing these days.