(no subject)
i hate my random depressions. they make no sense ad they come on too strong. i try so hard to get myself out of it. music, laughing, joking. but once i'm in one im like stuck and i find that i cant demand myself to not feel it. i just have to wait it out. though laughing and joking make it bearable. it could be worse.
anyways, katie laase is here. i love her. she always has such a good vibe. she's so happy to be alive enjoys everything fully.
i realized i need to start seeing things from a wider perspective. most things really aren't that big of a deal. seriously. they're not. and most things in my life are relatively easy to fix. i have options. i have time. i have future. i seriously do. so why do i feel like i'm going to crumble?
i'm working on channeling energy. i think that help me begin to take out the "i" in my life. we should all live without that intrusive "I" that breaks up the world into decreasingly smaller and smaller subgroups all with their own, different agendas. so waht if a person reaches their personal goal? so what? they're not at the top of their ladder...how is that satisfying? why is that satisfying?why is that good? who gives a shit! im not making any sense.
anyways, taking out the "i" the "me" in the way i look at life. or life. how do i get there? i realize i am pretty easily over-looked. that might help me in the long run though right now it makes me feel pretty shitty. ok, now i'm just feeling sorry for myself which is NOT the right path to take becca.
we're gunna listen to the flaming lips four disc set tonight. zaireeka or something. i miss home.
leave me love. i need it.
anyways, katie laase is here. i love her. she always has such a good vibe. she's so happy to be alive enjoys everything fully.
i realized i need to start seeing things from a wider perspective. most things really aren't that big of a deal. seriously. they're not. and most things in my life are relatively easy to fix. i have options. i have time. i have future. i seriously do. so why do i feel like i'm going to crumble?
i'm working on channeling energy. i think that help me begin to take out the "i" in my life. we should all live without that intrusive "I" that breaks up the world into decreasingly smaller and smaller subgroups all with their own, different agendas. so waht if a person reaches their personal goal? so what? they're not at the top of their ladder...how is that satisfying? why is that satisfying?why is that good? who gives a shit! im not making any sense.
anyways, taking out the "i" the "me" in the way i look at life. or life. how do i get there? i realize i am pretty easily over-looked. that might help me in the long run though right now it makes me feel pretty shitty. ok, now i'm just feeling sorry for myself which is NOT the right path to take becca.
we're gunna listen to the flaming lips four disc set tonight. zaireeka or something. i miss home.
leave me love. i need it.