Notes from a Midwest Wasteland
Okay, I'm being unfair, but between the dormant trees, brown grass and constant overcast, the view from my sofa is pretty bleak at the moment.
It's strange being back at home for spring break, mostly because VT's break is a different week than all my other friends' and I don't have many people to hang out with right now. I've spent all my time filling out job apps for this summer, which leave me with a slight sense of panicky despair. I really, really don't wanna work at the Kroger or the McDonalds, but summer work is so scarce around here that I need to take anything I can get. This will probably be my last summer in Ohio -- I'm applying for internships next summer that will hopefully be both out-of-state and relevant to my studies -- and that thought is both encouraging and terrifying. On one hand, I really do need to get out of here, and a job that is intellectually stimulating and relevant would be fantastic, but on the other, I'm stressed over the idea of living alone in an unfamiliar place and uncontrolled environment for several months. So many variables, aaaaugh...
...I just need to keep reminding myself that anything would be preferable to attaching sticky labels to envelopes for three hours a day. (I wish I was kidding. Oh, real-estate!job, why do you constantly find new and crushingly uncreative ways to occupy my time.)
My dad and I have been having lots of deep conversations about What It Means to Be An Adult since I've been home. I'm not sure what to think of this adolescent limbo -- I've been handling my own affairs and taking care of myself for several months now, but when I'm back home, neither my parents or I really know whether I should act and be treated as an adult or a kid. I mean, I did my taxes for the first time today (oh joy), and yet my mom still tells me to set the table and clean my room. It's weird and I don't think I like it, but it's just part of growing up, I guess.
Unrelated to the rest of this: for Lent this year I'm seriously cutting back on Tumblr. It wastes a massive portion of my free time and winds up making me angry more often than not, so it's probably healthier for me to step away from it for a while. We'll see how this goes.