(no subject)
Bleh, I miss Matty... He's so cute. I can't wait till Spring Break! EEEEE! =) It'll be the best two weeks of my life.
Anyway, Steven and I are going to try to be friends last night. He finally let me talk to him last night, and I fell asleep on the phone with him. I haven't done that in a while. I'm really glad we talked. =)
Anyway, I had a dream about Alex Rand the other night...
And the strange thing is, today Tiffany IMed me. =/ It's really weird that she IMed me. She just wants to talk I guess. I'm probably the only person on her buddy list at this time. lol
We had a very long conversation... and she's realized a lot of things I never thought she would. Basically everything she said is why I stopped talking to Luisa and Alex.
neurosis v01: Oh mah gawdz, It's Victoria.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: who's this?
neurosis v01: Tiffany.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: oh. hi?
neurosis v01: I haven't spoken to you in forever and I was wondering what it's like out of Lake County
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I wouldn't know. I don't live there.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: haha.
neurosis v01: You're in Tampa or something, right?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: oh
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: sorry, I read that wrong
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
neurosis v01: lolz
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: No. Not in Tampa. I was in tampa for a little while, but now I'm back in Apopka.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: about 30 minutes away from Lake County.
neurosis v01: Ahh, that's cool.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: mhm.
neurosis v01: Yeah, I'm still here in LC.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That sucks.
neurosis v01: graduating this semester though and then I will gtfo
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol that's good.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You're graduating early?
neurosis v01: yeah, don't know how the hell I managed that one.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: haha. Well, that's really good. LC bites ass.
neurosis v01: lol yeah it does, alot.
neurosis v01: Do you still talk to Alex, and Luisa?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Nah.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I pretty much stopped talking to a lot of people from there after I moved.
neurosis v01: Yeah, I probably would too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I sitll talk to Don on occasion, but that's it.
neurosis v01: I never see Don anymore.
neurosis v01: Alex and I broke up, and I don't talk to Luisa either.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: We hang out some weekends when I go down and see Molly, Ryan, and my mom.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Oh wow, why?
neurosis v01: yeah.
neurosis v01: Alex and I got in to deep with shit, and I went through a very rough time
neurosis v01: and Luisa has a big fucking mouth and blabs about things she shouldn't and over exagerates.
neurosis v01: so he broke up with me, and I could not be happier about it.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Well, I guess that's good if you're happy about it.
neurosis v01: yeah, I needed it.
neurosis v01: As soon as I got him out of my life, the drugs went away too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's good.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah, they aren't exactly the best people to be around.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: After I stopped talking to him I changed a lot.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: haha, I can't say I changed
neurosis v01: I think the me before I moved here came back.
neurosis v01: He's still very into drugs, and he's hanging out with Jessie again.
neurosis v01: he fucking OD'd this summer, with me there with him.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: are you serious?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: did he have to go to the hospital?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: What the hell did he od on?
neurosis v01: he went alittle crazy one night when we did shrooms
neurosis v01: his eyes turned RED like, there was NO white in them at all. he stopped breathing and like started convulsing, couldn't speak for 2 hours
neurosis v01: I had to calm him down and basically baby sit, and he is so lucky I had stopped tripping.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: wow...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: jesus.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I went through something similar with Danielle, down in Tampa if it makes you feel better.
neurosis v01: scary right?
neurosis v01: I haven't touched shrooms since and it helped me change my mind about acid.
neurosis v01: I wish it would have flicked a switch in his head though.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: yeah, that shit fucks up your mind
neurosis v01: yeah it does.
neurosis v01: He tells everyone it wasn't that bad, I don't think he wants to admit there was a chance of him not making it if i wasn't there.
neurosis v01: he remembers NOTHING
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he doesn't know it wasn't that bad then
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: if he doesn't even friggin' remember.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I use to love alex to death, but he's got some serious issues he needs to deal with. It's like... he does shit just to... I don't know.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Like nothing matters really to him.
neurosis v01: He really doesn't give a fuck about anything
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Everything is just something to take his mind off life. You know?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah.
neurosis v01: he was one of my closest friends for awhile, but he stabbed me in the back and now he's trying to play it off like he did nothing.
neurosis v01: it's totally obvious he still cares, but he just doesn't try, for anything
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah that's the way he is.
neurosis v01: yeah, he gave me a guilt trip about doing that once in awhile with drugs.
neurosis v01: He needs help
neurosis v01: and he pushes away all the friends that can help him and keeps the people who are into the same thing as him, that also need help
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I use to get really angry with him...b/c half the time he tries to act like he doesn't give a shit, and then he'd just be really sweet when it was just him and me. And he'd ask me about shit that was bothering me.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: But It'd piss me off and I wouldn't tell him. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: B/c I hate people who act like they care one second, and then don't the next.
neurosis v01: yeah he was like that with me too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Reminds me too much of Brandin.
neurosis v01: and he really sucks in the boyfriend department
neurosis v01: he's just very self centered
neurosis v01: he could be an amazing person, just needs to pull his head out of his butt.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You said it.
neurosis v01: Luisa has changed alot too.
neurosis v01: She is so possesive of alex, omg.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Ehh...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: She always has been.
neurosis v01: now that she managed to squeeze me out, she hasn't spoken to me.
neurosis v01: She wanted to be bff when she wasn't smoking
neurosis v01: then when she started, it was OMG I HAVE TO GET ALEX BACK
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think she probably felt alienated from him, and then as soon as they had something in common again...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol I think so too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think Alex kinda makes her feel better about herself.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Like, he's so messed up.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You know?
neurosis v01: I think so too.
neurosis v01: Luisa is too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah, that's what I meant...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he's so messed up, so it's ok for her to be.
neurosis v01: They're both messed up, and both very selfish, and they complete each other.
neurosis v01: they bring each other down.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Exactly.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Sometimes I think that there's more there in Luisa's mind.
neurosis v01: And oh god she can run her mouth, about others and be completely wrong, but if someone says something about her, the world is ending.
neurosis v01: there is.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Like, she knows she'd never have him like that. B/c she likes girls, and.... alex doesn't see her like that.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You know?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: So she pushes everyone away from him.
neurosis v01: I think so too.
neurosis v01: But I'm not exactly sure she's completely gay.
neurosis v01: Now she's coming out to admit she doesn't have a preferance
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I'm glad you see that shit. It took me forever to.
neurosis v01: yeah
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I never thought she was completely gay either.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think she just doesn't think she can get a guy...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and the only one she probably really wants is Alex.
neurosis v01: she is possesive over him like someone who likes him, not a best friend.
neurosis v01: exactly
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: yeah.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: She probably thinks she's in love with him.
neurosis v01: probably
neurosis v01: I think Alex is a bit queer though.
neurosis v01: I seriously am convinced he leans more towards guys.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: And this is the only way she can stay close to him, as long as she keeps other girls from him.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think he does too.
neurosis v01: yup, totally agree.
neurosis v01: when he was with me, he checked out more guys than girls.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I always thought that. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think a big part of that is probably like...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Alex doesn't want to be the guy you know?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he wants someone to control him, I think. Since he doesn't control himself.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Know what I mean?
neurosis v01: I think so too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I use to feel really bad for him.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I always wanted to talk to him about this shit, but I never knew how to bring it up.
neurosis v01: I got that from him, I used to want to slap him and be like "Who is the fucking girl in the relationship?"
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah.
neurosis v01: I don't think any of it would sink in if you did.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: He's not good at being the supporter...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: probably not.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: He wants someone to support him.
neurosis v01: He does.
neurosis v01: Hopefully he comes out to admit all this, before he gets himself in to deep with a girl, or whatever.
neurosis v01: Jessie is still madly in love with him
neurosis v01: and you will never guess what she did, while him and i were together
neurosis v01: (and I can not believe he still talks to her after she did something like this)
neurosis v01: she was pregnant with HIS kid, and "so he could be with me" she killed it, HERSELF
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: what...
neurosis v01: and he wonders why I hate her.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: omg...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: omfg
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: What the hell is wrong with her?
neurosis v01: I was speachless when he told me
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Are you sure he she was really pregnant.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: she could've just said that shit. She's pretty fucked in the head herself...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: omfg...
neurosis v01: she is
neurosis v01: but I dunno
neurosis v01: I guess her mother helped her.
neurosis v01: But if she did, I want it to slip to the wrong person and i want her to go down for it.
neurosis v01: I mean, I'm still not 100% pro abortion and all that, but for certain circumstances I'm not
neurosis v01: and if you want to get rid of a kid, YOU PAY THE MONEY AND DO IT LEGALLY.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I don't want to know really, but I guess it's morbid curiousity...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: how'd she do it, do you know?
neurosis v01: some vitamin over dose or something
neurosis v01: I told Alex I want to know as little as possible,
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's fucked up.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You know what she basically did...
neurosis v01: I was livid on the phone with him, if she didn't live so far away I would have found her, and hurt her.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: she is trying to push the death of that baby on you...
neurosis v01: she is
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: She's saying she did it for him to be with you...
neurosis v01: and she can't blame that on me, I am noones scapegoat, especially for something like this.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: but that's code for, "tiffany is the reason I had to kill your baby alex"
neurosis v01: Which in turn would make him feel horrible.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: God...what sick, fucked up people...
neurosis v01: I guess she got drunk at a party with Alex acouple weeks ago and was pulling that shit.
neurosis v01: but according to what I read about it from his lj, he said she deserved everything she got, and felt that night
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: *sigh*
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Alex needs to get away from these people.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: But he never will.
neurosis v01: he really does.
neurosis v01: I mentioned that assocaiting with her makes him look bad and him and Luisa are like
neurosis v01: "huh, why?"
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: ...b/c she's insane?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: And she killed your kid...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and...well, she's trash.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think those are good enough reasons.
neurosis v01: he won't see that though
neurosis v01: he thinks they are good friends and such
neurosis v01: he talked to her behind my back when him and i were together
neurosis v01: he
neurosis v01: d bring up things for their relationships and she'd do the same
neurosis v01: i was like "Hello, you have a girl who isn't a peice of shit now, and isn't trailor trash and someone pretty, wtf are you doing still talking to her?"
neurosis v01: I mean, talk to whoeever you want, but don't lie about it.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: yeah.
neurosis v01: I never felt threatened because they dated, she pissed me off because she is a cunt, when I met her I was nice to her and she told everyone I was a slut?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: well, he doesn't care if he lies...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he's always going to lie.
neurosis v01: But he cares so much if someone else does.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: b/c to him it's not wrong.
neurosis v01: I dont think he'll ever realize the error of his ways
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I don't think so either.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Good that you see it though. You're really better off without all that crap.
neurosis v01: Yeah
neurosis v01: Im enjoying being single.
neurosis v01: I
neurosis v01: fucking enter key.
neurosis v01: I have like, sober friends now and it's pretty awesome
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Not all my friends are sober here, but they aren't as fucked up. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: So I don't mind.
neurosis v01: haha
neurosis v01: yeah, not all of mine are but ehh
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Dude we should have out sometime when I'm down in lc.
neurosis v01: they don't push shit on me like Alex and them.
neurosis v01: totally.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: did you get a car?
neurosis v01: not yet, but I do have my lisence.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's awesome.
neurosis v01: yeah I just got it, haha
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I finally got a car. Right before i Moved. lol
neurosis v01: haha
neurosis v01: yeah, I think Im getting a dodge neon or a civic
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: ahhh
neurosis v01: I want a restaurant job, I'll make more money
neurosis v01: and get a car sooner
neurosis v01: I think my mom will let me use her car if I bug her, lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Well, yeah. We'll hang out sometime. Right now I'm broke. lol
neurosis v01: lol me too
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I wouldn't have any money to do anything.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I have 20 bucks...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: 15 is going in my car...
neurosis v01: I have one dollar.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and 5 are going to a pack of newports... lol
neurosis v01: haha
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and then I have 2 dollars to waste...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
neurosis v01: lol
neurosis v01: I need 3 dollars soI can get me some camels
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: What are you doing out of school anyway?
neurosis v01: Stayed home because I have a massive headache
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That sucks. Is it any better?
neurosis v01: yeah, thanks to some headache pills
We talked more after that, but just small talk. Crazy. I'm glad she got her head out of her ass. She seems to be more decent now.
This part of the conversation later though was really funny.
neurosis v01: hahaha
neurosis v01: I am talking to people but not seeing anyone.
neurosis v01: I'm upped my standards ALOT and because of that, I will be single for awhile.
neurosis v01: Unless a super sexy norweigan man somehow crosses my path
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: LOL
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Hey, speaking of which...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: my bro and his nerdy little, world of warcraft friends are going to norway this summer.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I'm gonna go with.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol OMG
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: b/c I want to see norway
neurosis v01: I do too, and the men.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: if you went you'd meet a norweigan XD
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: you'd be bound to
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: OMG, XD
neurosis v01: lol
neurosis v01: I know
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I'm such a dork.
neurosis v01: I'd have to take him back with me
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: LOL
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: is that legal?
neurosis v01: I dunno.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I thought you couldn't cross the borders with stuff...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lmao
neurosis v01: ehh....we'll pretend he's a mail order husband or something
neurosis v01: I just had to pick him up.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: LOL
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's so wrong...
neurosis v01: lol
neurosis v01: I know
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: He'll be able to speak your name...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and that's it. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: but who wants a man who talks?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol, that's all I need to hear.
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: right?
neurosis v01: lololz
Noreigans for the win. lol
Bleh, so that was Tiffany. I'm going down to lake county today. I may chill with her now. I'm glad she's cleaned up. She always had the possibility of being decent. lol I'm glad she is. B/c at one point we did get along.
Doing laundry, and then I'm leaving. Yay for me.
Matthew gets out of school at 4. =) Only 2 more hours. Blee. He says Blee now. Lol He stole Corinne's word. Oh well.
Random nonesense. I think I'm going to stop posting now. Maybe I'll post some more lyrics, Matt! What then!?!
Adios guys. <3
Anyway, Steven and I are going to try to be friends last night. He finally let me talk to him last night, and I fell asleep on the phone with him. I haven't done that in a while. I'm really glad we talked. =)
Anyway, I had a dream about Alex Rand the other night...
And the strange thing is, today Tiffany IMed me. =/ It's really weird that she IMed me. She just wants to talk I guess. I'm probably the only person on her buddy list at this time. lol
We had a very long conversation... and she's realized a lot of things I never thought she would. Basically everything she said is why I stopped talking to Luisa and Alex.
neurosis v01: Oh mah gawdz, It's Victoria.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: who's this?
neurosis v01: Tiffany.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: oh. hi?
neurosis v01: I haven't spoken to you in forever and I was wondering what it's like out of Lake County
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I wouldn't know. I don't live there.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: haha.
neurosis v01: You're in Tampa or something, right?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: oh
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: sorry, I read that wrong
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
neurosis v01: lolz
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: No. Not in Tampa. I was in tampa for a little while, but now I'm back in Apopka.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: about 30 minutes away from Lake County.
neurosis v01: Ahh, that's cool.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: mhm.
neurosis v01: Yeah, I'm still here in LC.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That sucks.
neurosis v01: graduating this semester though and then I will gtfo
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol that's good.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You're graduating early?
neurosis v01: yeah, don't know how the hell I managed that one.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: haha. Well, that's really good. LC bites ass.
neurosis v01: lol yeah it does, alot.
neurosis v01: Do you still talk to Alex, and Luisa?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Nah.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I pretty much stopped talking to a lot of people from there after I moved.
neurosis v01: Yeah, I probably would too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I sitll talk to Don on occasion, but that's it.
neurosis v01: I never see Don anymore.
neurosis v01: Alex and I broke up, and I don't talk to Luisa either.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: We hang out some weekends when I go down and see Molly, Ryan, and my mom.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Oh wow, why?
neurosis v01: yeah.
neurosis v01: Alex and I got in to deep with shit, and I went through a very rough time
neurosis v01: and Luisa has a big fucking mouth and blabs about things she shouldn't and over exagerates.
neurosis v01: so he broke up with me, and I could not be happier about it.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Well, I guess that's good if you're happy about it.
neurosis v01: yeah, I needed it.
neurosis v01: As soon as I got him out of my life, the drugs went away too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's good.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah, they aren't exactly the best people to be around.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: After I stopped talking to him I changed a lot.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: haha, I can't say I changed
neurosis v01: I think the me before I moved here came back.
neurosis v01: He's still very into drugs, and he's hanging out with Jessie again.
neurosis v01: he fucking OD'd this summer, with me there with him.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: are you serious?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: did he have to go to the hospital?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: What the hell did he od on?
neurosis v01: he went alittle crazy one night when we did shrooms
neurosis v01: his eyes turned RED like, there was NO white in them at all. he stopped breathing and like started convulsing, couldn't speak for 2 hours
neurosis v01: I had to calm him down and basically baby sit, and he is so lucky I had stopped tripping.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: wow...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: jesus.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I went through something similar with Danielle, down in Tampa if it makes you feel better.
neurosis v01: scary right?
neurosis v01: I haven't touched shrooms since and it helped me change my mind about acid.
neurosis v01: I wish it would have flicked a switch in his head though.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: yeah, that shit fucks up your mind
neurosis v01: yeah it does.
neurosis v01: He tells everyone it wasn't that bad, I don't think he wants to admit there was a chance of him not making it if i wasn't there.
neurosis v01: he remembers NOTHING
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he doesn't know it wasn't that bad then
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: if he doesn't even friggin' remember.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I use to love alex to death, but he's got some serious issues he needs to deal with. It's like... he does shit just to... I don't know.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Like nothing matters really to him.
neurosis v01: He really doesn't give a fuck about anything
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Everything is just something to take his mind off life. You know?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah.
neurosis v01: he was one of my closest friends for awhile, but he stabbed me in the back and now he's trying to play it off like he did nothing.
neurosis v01: it's totally obvious he still cares, but he just doesn't try, for anything
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah that's the way he is.
neurosis v01: yeah, he gave me a guilt trip about doing that once in awhile with drugs.
neurosis v01: He needs help
neurosis v01: and he pushes away all the friends that can help him and keeps the people who are into the same thing as him, that also need help
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I use to get really angry with him...b/c half the time he tries to act like he doesn't give a shit, and then he'd just be really sweet when it was just him and me. And he'd ask me about shit that was bothering me.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: But It'd piss me off and I wouldn't tell him. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: B/c I hate people who act like they care one second, and then don't the next.
neurosis v01: yeah he was like that with me too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Reminds me too much of Brandin.
neurosis v01: and he really sucks in the boyfriend department
neurosis v01: he's just very self centered
neurosis v01: he could be an amazing person, just needs to pull his head out of his butt.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You said it.
neurosis v01: Luisa has changed alot too.
neurosis v01: She is so possesive of alex, omg.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Ehh...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: She always has been.
neurosis v01: now that she managed to squeeze me out, she hasn't spoken to me.
neurosis v01: She wanted to be bff when she wasn't smoking
neurosis v01: then when she started, it was OMG I HAVE TO GET ALEX BACK
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think she probably felt alienated from him, and then as soon as they had something in common again...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol I think so too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think Alex kinda makes her feel better about herself.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Like, he's so messed up.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You know?
neurosis v01: I think so too.
neurosis v01: Luisa is too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah, that's what I meant...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he's so messed up, so it's ok for her to be.
neurosis v01: They're both messed up, and both very selfish, and they complete each other.
neurosis v01: they bring each other down.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Exactly.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Sometimes I think that there's more there in Luisa's mind.
neurosis v01: And oh god she can run her mouth, about others and be completely wrong, but if someone says something about her, the world is ending.
neurosis v01: there is.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Like, she knows she'd never have him like that. B/c she likes girls, and.... alex doesn't see her like that.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You know?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: So she pushes everyone away from him.
neurosis v01: I think so too.
neurosis v01: But I'm not exactly sure she's completely gay.
neurosis v01: Now she's coming out to admit she doesn't have a preferance
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I'm glad you see that shit. It took me forever to.
neurosis v01: yeah
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I never thought she was completely gay either.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think she just doesn't think she can get a guy...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and the only one she probably really wants is Alex.
neurosis v01: she is possesive over him like someone who likes him, not a best friend.
neurosis v01: exactly
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: yeah.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: She probably thinks she's in love with him.
neurosis v01: probably
neurosis v01: I think Alex is a bit queer though.
neurosis v01: I seriously am convinced he leans more towards guys.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: And this is the only way she can stay close to him, as long as she keeps other girls from him.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think he does too.
neurosis v01: yup, totally agree.
neurosis v01: when he was with me, he checked out more guys than girls.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I always thought that. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think a big part of that is probably like...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Alex doesn't want to be the guy you know?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he wants someone to control him, I think. Since he doesn't control himself.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Know what I mean?
neurosis v01: I think so too.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I use to feel really bad for him.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I always wanted to talk to him about this shit, but I never knew how to bring it up.
neurosis v01: I got that from him, I used to want to slap him and be like "Who is the fucking girl in the relationship?"
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah.
neurosis v01: I don't think any of it would sink in if you did.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: He's not good at being the supporter...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: probably not.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: He wants someone to support him.
neurosis v01: He does.
neurosis v01: Hopefully he comes out to admit all this, before he gets himself in to deep with a girl, or whatever.
neurosis v01: Jessie is still madly in love with him
neurosis v01: and you will never guess what she did, while him and i were together
neurosis v01: (and I can not believe he still talks to her after she did something like this)
neurosis v01: she was pregnant with HIS kid, and "so he could be with me" she killed it, HERSELF
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: what...
neurosis v01: and he wonders why I hate her.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: omg...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: omfg
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: What the hell is wrong with her?
neurosis v01: I was speachless when he told me
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Are you sure he she was really pregnant.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: she could've just said that shit. She's pretty fucked in the head herself...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: omfg...
neurosis v01: she is
neurosis v01: but I dunno
neurosis v01: I guess her mother helped her.
neurosis v01: But if she did, I want it to slip to the wrong person and i want her to go down for it.
neurosis v01: I mean, I'm still not 100% pro abortion and all that, but for certain circumstances I'm not
neurosis v01: and if you want to get rid of a kid, YOU PAY THE MONEY AND DO IT LEGALLY.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Yeah...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I don't want to know really, but I guess it's morbid curiousity...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: how'd she do it, do you know?
neurosis v01: some vitamin over dose or something
neurosis v01: I told Alex I want to know as little as possible,
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's fucked up.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: You know what she basically did...
neurosis v01: I was livid on the phone with him, if she didn't live so far away I would have found her, and hurt her.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: she is trying to push the death of that baby on you...
neurosis v01: she is
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: She's saying she did it for him to be with you...
neurosis v01: and she can't blame that on me, I am noones scapegoat, especially for something like this.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: but that's code for, "tiffany is the reason I had to kill your baby alex"
neurosis v01: Which in turn would make him feel horrible.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: God...what sick, fucked up people...
neurosis v01: I guess she got drunk at a party with Alex acouple weeks ago and was pulling that shit.
neurosis v01: but according to what I read about it from his lj, he said she deserved everything she got, and felt that night
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: *sigh*
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Alex needs to get away from these people.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: But he never will.
neurosis v01: he really does.
neurosis v01: I mentioned that assocaiting with her makes him look bad and him and Luisa are like
neurosis v01: "huh, why?"
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: ...b/c she's insane?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: And she killed your kid...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and...well, she's trash.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I think those are good enough reasons.
neurosis v01: he won't see that though
neurosis v01: he thinks they are good friends and such
neurosis v01: he talked to her behind my back when him and i were together
neurosis v01: he
neurosis v01: d bring up things for their relationships and she'd do the same
neurosis v01: i was like "Hello, you have a girl who isn't a peice of shit now, and isn't trailor trash and someone pretty, wtf are you doing still talking to her?"
neurosis v01: I mean, talk to whoeever you want, but don't lie about it.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: yeah.
neurosis v01: I never felt threatened because they dated, she pissed me off because she is a cunt, when I met her I was nice to her and she told everyone I was a slut?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: well, he doesn't care if he lies...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: he's always going to lie.
neurosis v01: But he cares so much if someone else does.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: b/c to him it's not wrong.
neurosis v01: I dont think he'll ever realize the error of his ways
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I don't think so either.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Good that you see it though. You're really better off without all that crap.
neurosis v01: Yeah
neurosis v01: Im enjoying being single.
neurosis v01: I
neurosis v01: fucking enter key.
neurosis v01: I have like, sober friends now and it's pretty awesome
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Not all my friends are sober here, but they aren't as fucked up. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: So I don't mind.
neurosis v01: haha
neurosis v01: yeah, not all of mine are but ehh
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Dude we should have out sometime when I'm down in lc.
neurosis v01: they don't push shit on me like Alex and them.
neurosis v01: totally.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: did you get a car?
neurosis v01: not yet, but I do have my lisence.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's awesome.
neurosis v01: yeah I just got it, haha
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I finally got a car. Right before i Moved. lol
neurosis v01: haha
neurosis v01: yeah, I think Im getting a dodge neon or a civic
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: ahhh
neurosis v01: I want a restaurant job, I'll make more money
neurosis v01: and get a car sooner
neurosis v01: I think my mom will let me use her car if I bug her, lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Well, yeah. We'll hang out sometime. Right now I'm broke. lol
neurosis v01: lol me too
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I wouldn't have any money to do anything.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I have 20 bucks...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: 15 is going in my car...
neurosis v01: I have one dollar.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and 5 are going to a pack of newports... lol
neurosis v01: haha
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and then I have 2 dollars to waste...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
neurosis v01: lol
neurosis v01: I need 3 dollars soI can get me some camels
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: What are you doing out of school anyway?
neurosis v01: Stayed home because I have a massive headache
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That sucks. Is it any better?
neurosis v01: yeah, thanks to some headache pills
We talked more after that, but just small talk. Crazy. I'm glad she got her head out of her ass. She seems to be more decent now.
This part of the conversation later though was really funny.
neurosis v01: hahaha
neurosis v01: I am talking to people but not seeing anyone.
neurosis v01: I'm upped my standards ALOT and because of that, I will be single for awhile.
neurosis v01: Unless a super sexy norweigan man somehow crosses my path
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: LOL
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: Hey, speaking of which...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: my bro and his nerdy little, world of warcraft friends are going to norway this summer.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I'm gonna go with.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol OMG
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: b/c I want to see norway
neurosis v01: I do too, and the men.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: if you went you'd meet a norweigan XD
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: you'd be bound to
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: OMG, XD
neurosis v01: lol
neurosis v01: I know
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I'm such a dork.
neurosis v01: I'd have to take him back with me
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: LOL
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: is that legal?
neurosis v01: I dunno.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: I thought you couldn't cross the borders with stuff...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lmao
neurosis v01: ehh....we'll pretend he's a mail order husband or something
neurosis v01: I just had to pick him up.
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: LOL
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: That's so wrong...
neurosis v01: lol
neurosis v01: I know
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: He'll be able to speak your name...
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: and that's it. lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: but who wants a man who talks?
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: lol
neurosis v01: lol, that's all I need to hear.
neurosis v01: lol
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: XD
Xk1lLm3qu1ckLyX: right?
neurosis v01: lololz
Noreigans for the win. lol
Bleh, so that was Tiffany. I'm going down to lake county today. I may chill with her now. I'm glad she's cleaned up. She always had the possibility of being decent. lol I'm glad she is. B/c at one point we did get along.
Doing laundry, and then I'm leaving. Yay for me.
Matthew gets out of school at 4. =) Only 2 more hours. Blee. He says Blee now. Lol He stole Corinne's word. Oh well.
Random nonesense. I think I'm going to stop posting now. Maybe I'll post some more lyrics, Matt! What then!?!
Adios guys. <3