(no subject)
She watched me spin, like the world upon it's axis.
Thoughts cascading, tumbling from open lips and yet she listened.
All I wanted was for my world to stop turning, to succumb to its maddening darkness
But there she stayed, her light touch seared into pale skin.
She watched me drown, sinking slowly, extending hand and gripping tightly.
She wouldn't let me go.
All I wanted was to stop this fighting.
And yet she pulled me back to leave me hanging,
suspended between these realms until I yearned for release.
She pulled me close, enveloped me in kindness but still I didn't weaken.
Fighting to keep this wall between us, never with a trusting heart.
All I wanted was the noose to tighten around my neck but slowly slowly she loosened it's grip.
Her hand against my shoulder, my eyes averted.
Afraid she'd see the darkness held there.
She gave me warmth, breathing unwanted life into these lungs.
Her calm gentle words soothing the hurt of a wound so deep.
Erasing lies clasped tight inside.
All I wanted was my blood to pour from these veins but instead my heart began to open, blossoming like the first buds of spring.
Her light against my darkness, her kindling warmth thawing my frozen heart.
She left me, blinded in darkness as her light slipped away.
Her sudden departure left me bereft and confused as I tumbled downward, no hand to hold.
All I needed was her light and yet I found myself in a sea of black.
A torrent of hate thrust against me, churning from within.
She left me in deafening silence, my own thoughts swirling in a funnel of thick black clouds.
Too dark to make sense of these frenzied illusions.
All I needed was her gentle voice of reason but inner harsh words replaced soft tone.
Waves crashed against my shore, the water an inkwell of loathing.
She left this link between us, a maddening sense of loss tugging at this string.
A pull so hard, it left me aching in grief.
All I wanted was to cut the cord, tear apart this invisible connection between us yet it felt final, written in death that she was gone, never to return.
Too late to stop this developed bond and sever our ties.
She left the noose about my neck, in tangled shadows.
I began to believe the lies, allowed them to wash over me, allowed them to blind me, allowed them to consume my very being.
Comforting like old friends, twisting her words, twisting their meaning, twisting her very existence.
All I could feel was it's tightening grip, I welcomed it. The ache inside me too much to bear. The lies running rampant behind closed eyes.
She left me drowning between this widening void with no hope of return.
Just the memory of her, like a dream I once had. Her image glowing in the darkness.
All I craved was the sound of her voice, her soothing words to chase away the darkness.
For her to tell me she wasn't a dream, that the lies were just that.
In the stillness I sought her presence.
I saw her smile as my eyes fluttered closed.
Heard her voice whisper in the darkness.
An aura of glowing gold surrounded her and I knew it was no dream.
In the final beating of my heart I believed her words.
But she would never return to me, not now.
© Emma Silvia 25/08/14
A/N: After the last one, my muse went away but she came back with vengeance. Not entirely happy with this one but it's been stuck in my notes since I wrote it so here it is. No cut because LJ +iPad do not mix.
Thoughts cascading, tumbling from open lips and yet she listened.
All I wanted was for my world to stop turning, to succumb to its maddening darkness
But there she stayed, her light touch seared into pale skin.
She watched me drown, sinking slowly, extending hand and gripping tightly.
She wouldn't let me go.
All I wanted was to stop this fighting.
And yet she pulled me back to leave me hanging,
suspended between these realms until I yearned for release.
She pulled me close, enveloped me in kindness but still I didn't weaken.
Fighting to keep this wall between us, never with a trusting heart.
All I wanted was the noose to tighten around my neck but slowly slowly she loosened it's grip.
Her hand against my shoulder, my eyes averted.
Afraid she'd see the darkness held there.
She gave me warmth, breathing unwanted life into these lungs.
Her calm gentle words soothing the hurt of a wound so deep.
Erasing lies clasped tight inside.
All I wanted was my blood to pour from these veins but instead my heart began to open, blossoming like the first buds of spring.
Her light against my darkness, her kindling warmth thawing my frozen heart.
She left me, blinded in darkness as her light slipped away.
Her sudden departure left me bereft and confused as I tumbled downward, no hand to hold.
All I needed was her light and yet I found myself in a sea of black.
A torrent of hate thrust against me, churning from within.
She left me in deafening silence, my own thoughts swirling in a funnel of thick black clouds.
Too dark to make sense of these frenzied illusions.
All I needed was her gentle voice of reason but inner harsh words replaced soft tone.
Waves crashed against my shore, the water an inkwell of loathing.
She left this link between us, a maddening sense of loss tugging at this string.
A pull so hard, it left me aching in grief.
All I wanted was to cut the cord, tear apart this invisible connection between us yet it felt final, written in death that she was gone, never to return.
Too late to stop this developed bond and sever our ties.
She left the noose about my neck, in tangled shadows.
I began to believe the lies, allowed them to wash over me, allowed them to blind me, allowed them to consume my very being.
Comforting like old friends, twisting her words, twisting their meaning, twisting her very existence.
All I could feel was it's tightening grip, I welcomed it. The ache inside me too much to bear. The lies running rampant behind closed eyes.
She left me drowning between this widening void with no hope of return.
Just the memory of her, like a dream I once had. Her image glowing in the darkness.
All I craved was the sound of her voice, her soothing words to chase away the darkness.
For her to tell me she wasn't a dream, that the lies were just that.
In the stillness I sought her presence.
I saw her smile as my eyes fluttered closed.
Heard her voice whisper in the darkness.
An aura of glowing gold surrounded her and I knew it was no dream.
In the final beating of my heart I believed her words.
But she would never return to me, not now.
© Emma Silvia 25/08/14
A/N: After the last one, my muse went away but she came back with vengeance. Not entirely happy with this one but it's been stuck in my notes since I wrote it so here it is. No cut because LJ +iPad do not mix.