The Devil Wears Prada
Went to the movies with Jase and Troy last night. As is usual with the three of us, the most enjoyable part of the nigth tends not to actually be the movie. It has a lot more to do with the helmets we can make out of the popcorn buckets, and how much popcorn we can throw at each other. Last night, Jase filled my handbag with popcorn, before i even noticed what he was doing, and this morning, i am still fishing bits out. When i got home and was getting changed to go to bed, a few pieces dropped out of my top as well....God only knows how long they had been sitting there for. Anyway, it was a good movie, and we got more bouncy balls on our way home. I swear, we are the bouncy balls makers biggest clients. We have apparently bought $28 worth of bounch balls in the last couple of weeks.
The reason i haven't updated in a while is that a lot has been going on, and i need to get my head around it before i can get it out of my head and onto a page. The hardest part is knowing where to start.
Karl actually came over on saturday last week. Despite the fact that i hoped he would stick to his word and turn up, i most definatly wasn't holding my breath, so it was a strangely plesant surprise when it actually happened. It was pretty uncomfortable when he first arrived and we had no idea what to do, but it was ok. We just chatted about nothing really, but it was ok. Jase and Troy and i were going out later that night, and we nipped over to Safeway before we went to convince David to come with us. Karl was working, adn long story short, he ended up coming out to the club with us. It was ok, but a little bit strange.He still got jealous of things, adn was still a little touchy feely, but it was still ok. We had a bit of a dance for a little while, grinding, but i broke away before it turned into anything. Anyway, nothing from him all week, but yesterday i got some of his mail, and as i was going out near his place anyway, i said I'd drop it off. Again with the uncomfortable small talk, but it was ok. As i was leaving i said i wanted to know where i stood with him. While i was driving away i got a message from him: "i still love u bel. It's just that I'm not ready yet to go back to what we had. U wanted to know where i stand, i guess now you know. xoxo"
What i actually meant when i asked the question was, what were we to each other. Just ex's or friends or lovers, or dating, or waiting or what?? I seriously don't know. it is wierd. We are more than friends, but less than anything else, and that is confusing. I just don't know what to do, and now, i am sort of more confused than before. I supose it helps to know how he feels, but it is hard to believe it some of the time, because of his actions. Confusing.
And to make matters worse. I met someone else, and he has a thing for me. We have been on a couple of dates (this was while Karl wasn't even acknowloging that i existed), and we get along well, but i don't love him, and i don't think i ever will. Not while Karl is there. But i don't want to hurt him. It sucks.
That brings you as up to date as i want you to be.
Love to all. xoxo
The reason i haven't updated in a while is that a lot has been going on, and i need to get my head around it before i can get it out of my head and onto a page. The hardest part is knowing where to start.
Karl actually came over on saturday last week. Despite the fact that i hoped he would stick to his word and turn up, i most definatly wasn't holding my breath, so it was a strangely plesant surprise when it actually happened. It was pretty uncomfortable when he first arrived and we had no idea what to do, but it was ok. We just chatted about nothing really, but it was ok. Jase and Troy and i were going out later that night, and we nipped over to Safeway before we went to convince David to come with us. Karl was working, adn long story short, he ended up coming out to the club with us. It was ok, but a little bit strange.He still got jealous of things, adn was still a little touchy feely, but it was still ok. We had a bit of a dance for a little while, grinding, but i broke away before it turned into anything. Anyway, nothing from him all week, but yesterday i got some of his mail, and as i was going out near his place anyway, i said I'd drop it off. Again with the uncomfortable small talk, but it was ok. As i was leaving i said i wanted to know where i stood with him. While i was driving away i got a message from him: "i still love u bel. It's just that I'm not ready yet to go back to what we had. U wanted to know where i stand, i guess now you know. xoxo"
What i actually meant when i asked the question was, what were we to each other. Just ex's or friends or lovers, or dating, or waiting or what?? I seriously don't know. it is wierd. We are more than friends, but less than anything else, and that is confusing. I just don't know what to do, and now, i am sort of more confused than before. I supose it helps to know how he feels, but it is hard to believe it some of the time, because of his actions. Confusing.
And to make matters worse. I met someone else, and he has a thing for me. We have been on a couple of dates (this was while Karl wasn't even acknowloging that i existed), and we get along well, but i don't love him, and i don't think i ever will. Not while Karl is there. But i don't want to hurt him. It sucks.
That brings you as up to date as i want you to be.
Love to all. xoxo