ahh
ive been feeling soo out of place lately .. past month ive been so stressed out 'cause its almost the end of my semister .. and i gotta raise some grades up. i hate it when im stressed out because unlike others, im very varnuable >dont know now to spell it< when im stressed out and very emotional. ill be wayyy too straight forward, and say things i dont even mean, and regret it. id walk around outside or go to the mall just so i can be around people, dont care if i dont know them, i just wanted to be around people .. im always like this towards the end of semisters .. thank god they only come twice a year .. three depending on what you do. or maybe four? who knows .. but yeah, am i happy? sure why not, semister is almost over, and ill be out of this state of mind and back to myself .. some say i need to be more selfish, 'cause i really dont care about myself, if i have a bad day, im pretty damn sure theres another person that had a even worst day than me, so why should i complain about it .. others say im close minded .. but thats 'cause nothing interesting happens, or that i dont think anything interesting happens .. i remember this one pretty little girl brianna who would always ask me hows my day gabe? have a great day gabe! .. she was the best .. of course i wouldnt care of how my day goes, i just let things happen .. but she never stopped saying it even if i didnt care .. while walking she told me, 'hey gabe look its your home(pointing at a trashcan) .. i would say thats awesome, put two trashcans on top, and id have a two story, while she would say' omg gabe are you serous? you wouldnt care if you lived there?wow gabe your a sad sad person' haha i dont care about small little things that people say to me, but she was awesome friend .. highschool wouldnt of been fun without her .. anyways, ive been soo wasted lately, id just sit somewhere about 10 feet from everybody, and just watch 'em having fun, dont get me wrong, im not like reallly depressed, but just seeing 'em friends talking and having a great time, makes me happy... iono why, i get it from my mom .. of course i get inside the fun and have a great time, but i dont know... its probably my stressed out emotional feelings that are talking .. i love and care for everyone, you can lie to me, ill still be your friend, you can cheat on me, id still be your friend, you can blame me, id still be your friend, 'cause i'd do anything for others to be happy .. ahh thats it, i havent wrote in a long while on this thing, so here it is.. bye