WHEN THE HOLIDAYS HAVE PASSED US BY.
I guess this will be my first post of 2008. I've noticed that I don't really have the motivation to write in my transition journal as much since I've been doing this whole thing for about 4 years. It'll be 4 years at the end of May to be exact. I've definatley had some ups and downs through the whole process, but I'm not sorry I went through any of it. I think feeling that way has shown a lot of growth in my perception of where I'm at in my life, and how comfortable I am with things. I wouldn't say I'm at 100%, but pretty close these days. It's even great to say I don't think of my transition as much anymore. Seems like I tortured myself with the constant thought of it everyday there for a few years. As the hormones changed me physically, and I had my chest surgery, there was a definate shift. It went slowly, but it came. It's a big reliefe.
So quite obviously the last time I posted, it was the day before halloween. The holidays were really busy, and it always sucks working in retail during that part of the year as I think I say every holiday, but I got through it ok. I didn't do much but go to a christmas get together with my co-workers, and I worked on thanksgiving up until 6. The winter has been pretty harsh this year with colder temperatures and all this white stuff falling from the sky. It's weird because it'll all melt , and then you'll wake up the next morning and step outside only to discover it has snowed yet again...lol. I think we'll have plenty of water for this year though, so that's good.
It's been 7 months since my chest surgery. About a month ago I realized the swelling went down a little more, and I was able to do away with binding my chest all of the time. I don't even do it at work anymore, and as far as that goes, I won't ever have to again. This doesn't mean my chest eventually healed up evenly. I'm still going to have to go under the knife one more time for finishing touches. The left side is still kind of too roundish looking, and the right side is flat but it rises up around my nipple in a cone shaped way. I think both sides of my chest really need to be thinned out, and reshaped. Then I think it'll be good to go. The nipples look kind of big, but it doesn't bother me as much as the rest of it. I also have to be careful with what size shirts I wear, and how many, or else you can see something isn't quite right, but it sure beats binding my chest everyday by a long shot. That part of things has really improved my life, and I'm so glad I had it done.
This time around I'm planning to talk with another surgeon just to see where I can go with someone who is a bit busier/ skillfull, and more into having direct social contact with thier patients. If I like her, and she says she wants to help me, it'll mean a few thousand more dollars. If it ends up being too much... I'll probably just go with the surgeon I have now. I really don't want to, but it's better than leaving my chest the way it is. We'll see though... everything is up in the air at this point.
I've been thinking I might open up another livejournal because I don't write in this one as much anymore. I don't know when that'll be, but when I do, I'll let people know here so they can add me if they wish. I'll also make sure my two journals are linked. Unfortunatley for people who are not my friends here and want to know more about me beyond all this, you won't be able to read it unless you join because it will not be a public journal. I'm interested to see if anyone comes out of the woodwork so to speak...I'm not holding my breath though...lol. I'm pretty sure there's only about 4 people who read this damn thing anyway. I think it's just come to a point in my transition where other things are more important now, and typically, it's the natural progression of things. Eventually I'll stop talking as much in here at all. I'll probably post pictures more here too. Anyway, it's nice to get back and update. I hope everyone is doing well.
So quite obviously the last time I posted, it was the day before halloween. The holidays were really busy, and it always sucks working in retail during that part of the year as I think I say every holiday, but I got through it ok. I didn't do much but go to a christmas get together with my co-workers, and I worked on thanksgiving up until 6. The winter has been pretty harsh this year with colder temperatures and all this white stuff falling from the sky. It's weird because it'll all melt , and then you'll wake up the next morning and step outside only to discover it has snowed yet again...lol. I think we'll have plenty of water for this year though, so that's good.
It's been 7 months since my chest surgery. About a month ago I realized the swelling went down a little more, and I was able to do away with binding my chest all of the time. I don't even do it at work anymore, and as far as that goes, I won't ever have to again. This doesn't mean my chest eventually healed up evenly. I'm still going to have to go under the knife one more time for finishing touches. The left side is still kind of too roundish looking, and the right side is flat but it rises up around my nipple in a cone shaped way. I think both sides of my chest really need to be thinned out, and reshaped. Then I think it'll be good to go. The nipples look kind of big, but it doesn't bother me as much as the rest of it. I also have to be careful with what size shirts I wear, and how many, or else you can see something isn't quite right, but it sure beats binding my chest everyday by a long shot. That part of things has really improved my life, and I'm so glad I had it done.
This time around I'm planning to talk with another surgeon just to see where I can go with someone who is a bit busier/ skillfull, and more into having direct social contact with thier patients. If I like her, and she says she wants to help me, it'll mean a few thousand more dollars. If it ends up being too much... I'll probably just go with the surgeon I have now. I really don't want to, but it's better than leaving my chest the way it is. We'll see though... everything is up in the air at this point.
I've been thinking I might open up another livejournal because I don't write in this one as much anymore. I don't know when that'll be, but when I do, I'll let people know here so they can add me if they wish. I'll also make sure my two journals are linked. Unfortunatley for people who are not my friends here and want to know more about me beyond all this, you won't be able to read it unless you join because it will not be a public journal. I'm interested to see if anyone comes out of the woodwork so to speak...I'm not holding my breath though...lol. I'm pretty sure there's only about 4 people who read this damn thing anyway. I think it's just come to a point in my transition where other things are more important now, and typically, it's the natural progression of things. Eventually I'll stop talking as much in here at all. I'll probably post pictures more here too. Anyway, it's nice to get back and update. I hope everyone is doing well.