anti-valentine's day date.
After discussion over the irony of going out on Valentine's Weekend, my hatred of baby pinks and purples and even the color white if it is associated with the previously stated colors, and how I'm firmly anti-Valentine's day, Chris and I decided to refer to our evening as our "Anti-Valentine's Day Date."
Sounds good to me.
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Chris took me out to dinner at Wolfey's last night. It was a pretty cool place, actually. I stopped home after work long enough to change my clothes and freshen my makeup (of course) and then I was right out the door and meeting him at the restaurant.
I swear he's even taller than before. And I was wearing boots with a heel!
Regardless of his hints that he's interested in perhaps something more than just friendship, I wasn't going into the evening considering it to be the date or "the start of something"; I simply saw it as dinner, a chance for two old friends (who happen to be exes) to catch up during the one's brief return to town.
Needless to say, it was an amazing night. We talked for almost two hours, and regardless of how bad my burnt French onion soup might have been, over all the night was pretty spectacular. We talked about everything under the sun - from writing, to psychology, politics, comic books, movies and more. We even talked about how men love seeing a woman in her underwear more than seeing her naked (he has a lingerie shot of Olivia Munn on his phone, and I actually do understand the obsession men have over her) and how women love a man in well-fitted clothes that suit their shape. It was an amusing conversation, the entire evening was! I never stopped laughing.
We talked casually about the idea of a relationship, both why we'd be the best couple ever (because we're both crazy writers who understand that American politicians from every corner of the board are idiots) to why we would be horrible together (because we're both crazy writers and I want to stay in the states, he wants to get the fuck out).
I think the most amusing thing to me in a sense, was at the end of the night. He got a text from some friends who wanted him to stop by while he was in town. I told him that as soon as he wants to go hang out with them, he just had to say the word and we could leave. When we did leave a few minutes later he apologized, and I laughed at him, saying that I understand he's only in town for a short time, he has a lot of important people to see; I get it. Apparently this was shocking, as he stopped for a moment and stared at me before saying 'Thank You', like he was surprised that I was so understanding. Really? It's called common courtesy, people! I'm not a bitch (most of the time), lol.
He walked me to my car, admiring Christian's poor nose job, and as expected, yes, we did kiss a little. We stood there, myself up on the curb though he was still taller, and laughed about how this was familiar; kissing in the freezing cold by my car. I buried my hands in his (issuing a, "I knew you just wanted me for my body" from Chris) and joked about how we need better timing, preferably sometime warm. He said that perhaps this time we can make things work and last into the warm months. I said that sounded great to me -- because kissing in the cold isn't all that fun. He teased about liking the idea of having me around when his birthday comes in May, and I teased that I'll be 21 before him and asked how it feels to be dating an older woman. I caught myself, corrected my mistake ("Well, we're not actually dating, but you know what I mean,") he laughed and kissed me as if to say "shut up".
We also talked, both during dinner and outside, as well as online a few nights before, how this year apart was a good thing. We've both grown, and I don't regret how my life changed after losing him. I said that things worked out the way they were meant to. He said, "I think I just wasn't ready to be with someone like you then, but I've grown a lot." Of course I couldn't be serious (we were never good at the "serious" stuff), and teased him, saying, "I think that's a compliment?" he teased back, and ultimately I ended up falling against him laughing, saying, "Oh god, we're going to drive each other insane. We're both crazy!"
Chris' response? Something along the lines of, "I can do insane, as long as I'm with someone as crazy as I am."
It was stupidly sweet, and so damn us.
I haven't heard from him since, but that's not surprising. We usually hear from each other every few days anyway. I have no idea where this is going, if it will go anywhere at all; he wants me to come visit him some weekend, and if I can get two weekend days off, sure, I'll go. We've had the sex talk (actually, minus Ashy & Alex, he probably knows the most about my history with guys when it comes to the intimate stuff and my feelings on that side of things now), we've always been extremely honest about where we stand on that, and he understands. He admits he hopes I'll get over my hang-ups sooner rather than later, but he says it in a teasing but encouraging way.
Chris is a great guy, there's no doubt about that. He doesn't make me feel head-over-heels, like I'm losing my mind. He makes me feel grounded, confident, whole. We can be complete idiots, and I can be open with him, and he with me. It was the most mature relationship I'd ever been in (even if it was short lived), which is ironic as we act like immature children most of the time. I love that about him, though, about us.
As I said, I don't know if this is going anywhere. I won't be crushed if it doesn't, honestly, but at the same time, I really hope that a year has made enough of a difference that perhaps this time we can be something great together. I think we're good for each other, that we fit so brilliantly it kind of makes my head spin at times. I'm not allowing myself to get worked up over the "what-ifs", but at the same time, I'm still me, and optimism is by far my most prominent trait.
<3
Sounds good to me.
------------------------------------------
Chris took me out to dinner at Wolfey's last night. It was a pretty cool place, actually. I stopped home after work long enough to change my clothes and freshen my makeup (of course) and then I was right out the door and meeting him at the restaurant.
I swear he's even taller than before. And I was wearing boots with a heel!
Regardless of his hints that he's interested in perhaps something more than just friendship, I wasn't going into the evening considering it to be the date or "the start of something"; I simply saw it as dinner, a chance for two old friends (who happen to be exes) to catch up during the one's brief return to town.
Needless to say, it was an amazing night. We talked for almost two hours, and regardless of how bad my burnt French onion soup might have been, over all the night was pretty spectacular. We talked about everything under the sun - from writing, to psychology, politics, comic books, movies and more. We even talked about how men love seeing a woman in her underwear more than seeing her naked (he has a lingerie shot of Olivia Munn on his phone, and I actually do understand the obsession men have over her) and how women love a man in well-fitted clothes that suit their shape. It was an amusing conversation, the entire evening was! I never stopped laughing.
We talked casually about the idea of a relationship, both why we'd be the best couple ever (because we're both crazy writers who understand that American politicians from every corner of the board are idiots) to why we would be horrible together (because we're both crazy writers and I want to stay in the states, he wants to get the fuck out).
I think the most amusing thing to me in a sense, was at the end of the night. He got a text from some friends who wanted him to stop by while he was in town. I told him that as soon as he wants to go hang out with them, he just had to say the word and we could leave. When we did leave a few minutes later he apologized, and I laughed at him, saying that I understand he's only in town for a short time, he has a lot of important people to see; I get it. Apparently this was shocking, as he stopped for a moment and stared at me before saying 'Thank You', like he was surprised that I was so understanding. Really? It's called common courtesy, people! I'm not a bitch (most of the time), lol.
He walked me to my car, admiring Christian's poor nose job, and as expected, yes, we did kiss a little. We stood there, myself up on the curb though he was still taller, and laughed about how this was familiar; kissing in the freezing cold by my car. I buried my hands in his (issuing a, "I knew you just wanted me for my body" from Chris) and joked about how we need better timing, preferably sometime warm. He said that perhaps this time we can make things work and last into the warm months. I said that sounded great to me -- because kissing in the cold isn't all that fun. He teased about liking the idea of having me around when his birthday comes in May, and I teased that I'll be 21 before him and asked how it feels to be dating an older woman. I caught myself, corrected my mistake ("Well, we're not actually dating, but you know what I mean,") he laughed and kissed me as if to say "shut up".
We also talked, both during dinner and outside, as well as online a few nights before, how this year apart was a good thing. We've both grown, and I don't regret how my life changed after losing him. I said that things worked out the way they were meant to. He said, "I think I just wasn't ready to be with someone like you then, but I've grown a lot." Of course I couldn't be serious (we were never good at the "serious" stuff), and teased him, saying, "I think that's a compliment?" he teased back, and ultimately I ended up falling against him laughing, saying, "Oh god, we're going to drive each other insane. We're both crazy!"
Chris' response? Something along the lines of, "I can do insane, as long as I'm with someone as crazy as I am."
It was stupidly sweet, and so damn us.
I haven't heard from him since, but that's not surprising. We usually hear from each other every few days anyway. I have no idea where this is going, if it will go anywhere at all; he wants me to come visit him some weekend, and if I can get two weekend days off, sure, I'll go. We've had the sex talk (actually, minus Ashy & Alex, he probably knows the most about my history with guys when it comes to the intimate stuff and my feelings on that side of things now), we've always been extremely honest about where we stand on that, and he understands. He admits he hopes I'll get over my hang-ups sooner rather than later, but he says it in a teasing but encouraging way.
Chris is a great guy, there's no doubt about that. He doesn't make me feel head-over-heels, like I'm losing my mind. He makes me feel grounded, confident, whole. We can be complete idiots, and I can be open with him, and he with me. It was the most mature relationship I'd ever been in (even if it was short lived), which is ironic as we act like immature children most of the time. I love that about him, though, about us.
As I said, I don't know if this is going anywhere. I won't be crushed if it doesn't, honestly, but at the same time, I really hope that a year has made enough of a difference that perhaps this time we can be something great together. I think we're good for each other, that we fit so brilliantly it kind of makes my head spin at times. I'm not allowing myself to get worked up over the "what-ifs", but at the same time, I'm still me, and optimism is by far my most prominent trait.
<3