SAdness
Depression...but honestly i am not emo...just feeling a bit down..cuz ppl are making me sad.
Sigh...seems like this is the only i do these days. I am a person of lots of insecurities. I was really glad that i was happy for sometime..then...once again...when i had a happier prespective of life...ppl just put me down with either their jealousy, bitterness, evilness, or..whatever. why do ppl enjoy hurting others? i suppose they find it really fun and really it makes it soooo much fuckin better for themselves when they crush other's happiness. Yes...WELL sorry for being happy...but...i don't get happy that often ...thanks a lot...fuckers.
it seem as though i sound like those emo ppl complaining about life and not really treasuring things in front of me but thats not true...i treasure everything that God gives, everything my parents give to me and sacrifice for me and everything i can find happiness in but i don't understand why people are so cruel...to be able to find joy in hurting me...to find anger when i'm happy ...well words to all of them...is...really i am not really a happy person inside...though when i smile ppl think i am just giddy/joyous/hyper....its probably at the moment, or...just a second there i found some happiness...honestly i would beg all of them..just stop......how is it ok when i have to be the one to show understanding..compassion and all those fucking shit....and its not ok when i'm mad or sad...well sorry i'm a fuckin human too so i do feel mad/pain/sadness...not that i'm a robot. Sorry that for once i'm not sad just for a second...sorry that i try to find things that make me happy and they don't ...sorry that life doesn't go ur way...not like i made ur life that way....so don't fuckin give me a hard time ...sorry for when i am happy about something...sorry that ppl aren't happy, sorry for ever finding happiness...oh yeh and thanks for hurting me and thanks for taking away the happiness that i've tried really hard to obtained...sorry that ppl would have to hurt me cuz i honestly don't see how /why/ have not heart to hurt others...sorry for this is my honest feelings that i harbor for so long...honestly...i'm not really such a happy person so...just please world/ppl stop letting me down, stop hurting me because honestly i never hurted you.
PS. to my family and ppl who support and love me and never ever say hurtful things to me and those who always listens and never complain...even when my problems are not even as great as urs...i love you all very much with all my heart and i wish i could honestly honestly pay back all ur love, care, and support with oceans of love and care back . I really love you because of you guys are the ones who give me a lot of the happiness i can find in this world.
Sigh...seems like this is the only i do these days. I am a person of lots of insecurities. I was really glad that i was happy for sometime..then...once again...when i had a happier prespective of life...ppl just put me down with either their jealousy, bitterness, evilness, or..whatever. why do ppl enjoy hurting others? i suppose they find it really fun and really it makes it soooo much fuckin better for themselves when they crush other's happiness. Yes...WELL sorry for being happy...but...i don't get happy that often ...thanks a lot...fuckers.
it seem as though i sound like those emo ppl complaining about life and not really treasuring things in front of me but thats not true...i treasure everything that God gives, everything my parents give to me and sacrifice for me and everything i can find happiness in but i don't understand why people are so cruel...to be able to find joy in hurting me...to find anger when i'm happy ...well words to all of them...is...really i am not really a happy person inside...though when i smile ppl think i am just giddy/joyous/hyper....its probably at the moment, or...just a second there i found some happiness...honestly i would beg all of them..just stop......how is it ok when i have to be the one to show understanding..compassion and all those fucking shit....and its not ok when i'm mad or sad...well sorry i'm a fuckin human too so i do feel mad/pain/sadness...not that i'm a robot. Sorry that for once i'm not sad just for a second...sorry that i try to find things that make me happy and they don't ...sorry that life doesn't go ur way...not like i made ur life that way....so don't fuckin give me a hard time ...sorry for when i am happy about something...sorry that ppl aren't happy, sorry for ever finding happiness...oh yeh and thanks for hurting me and thanks for taking away the happiness that i've tried really hard to obtained...sorry that ppl would have to hurt me cuz i honestly don't see how /why/ have not heart to hurt others...sorry for this is my honest feelings that i harbor for so long...honestly...i'm not really such a happy person so...just please world/ppl stop letting me down, stop hurting me because honestly i never hurted you.
PS. to my family and ppl who support and love me and never ever say hurtful things to me and those who always listens and never complain...even when my problems are not even as great as urs...i love you all very much with all my heart and i wish i could honestly honestly pay back all ur love, care, and support with oceans of love and care back . I really love you because of you guys are the ones who give me a lot of the happiness i can find in this world.