This changes everything.
The other day I was outside with New Jamaican Counter Guy and Kitchen Girl. Over the last few weeks he said stuff about her, but it was always the same thing. I'll get to that later.
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I actually mentioned this in a post once. Ended up hiding the post because it seriously needed to be re-written. Almost left this out completely because I thought it wasn't important. The conversation included someone saying she was fat but she didn't care, she was going to eat the chili cheese fries anyway. In the middle of that I told her she wasn't fat. If I bring back that post as a flashback, you will see why the whole conversation was mono-tone. Much bigger thing going on in this situation. First real notable encounter with Kitchen Girl that changed everything and got us to where we were.
I have gotten three hugs from this girl. New Years Eve I pulled her to me. It was like one of those 'we are pretending there is a chair between us hugs. Arms are around each others back, but not really touching anywhere else. like the letter A. Birthday hug was in my office and about the same, but I think I had machine parts on the floor. I was building stuff. Between those two there was a day that I brought her a shake. The night before she mentioned wanting one, but the place is closed when she gets out of work and she doesn't have much money. I planned to bring her one the next day. Then got a message from her asking me to bring her one because she was having a bad day. F'ing mind reader, she is. I later got the best hug of my life in front of the guy I planned to write about next. She fit. We were like two puzzle pieces that always belonged together.
The past pictures of her were a little round. She occasionally mentions being fat. Usually when she is in a grumpy mood. I always insist she isn't. I always figured 'maybe it is just her loose shirt, pretty eyes, wicked smile, and/or soft hair distracting me from it.' because I wasn't seeing it. One day (months ago) in the bar she wasn't in the mood for me, not my fault. I had to be there for other reasons. She said it, I said she wasn't. She said it again, I said somewhat angrily "Stop it, you are not fat. At all." This was in front of a lot of people we work with. No one else had been responding to her statement.
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So, as I said, we are standing outside. Kitchen girl mentioned she at one point got really anorexic. Jamaican counter guy said she did. This is the point where I realized that they had actually known each other before we worked together. They are the same age. Had no idea. Also, changed my whole idea of what was actually happening when she said she was fat. Really wasn't often enough for me to even think about, nor mention before. Always like a minor few second thing once in a great while.
Can't describe how this feels. Girl really needed to hear that she wasn't fat. No one else in her life seemed to catch it. Yes, I do this all the time... but the reason she was saying it was not at all what I had thought it was. Need to rethink a lot of what had gone on over the last several months. Along with what Jamaican Counterguy was trying to tell me. I think he may have been testing me for her. To see what my response to his 'I would bang her' comment would be.
---
I actually mentioned this in a post once. Ended up hiding the post because it seriously needed to be re-written. Almost left this out completely because I thought it wasn't important. The conversation included someone saying she was fat but she didn't care, she was going to eat the chili cheese fries anyway. In the middle of that I told her she wasn't fat. If I bring back that post as a flashback, you will see why the whole conversation was mono-tone. Much bigger thing going on in this situation. First real notable encounter with Kitchen Girl that changed everything and got us to where we were.
I have gotten three hugs from this girl. New Years Eve I pulled her to me. It was like one of those 'we are pretending there is a chair between us hugs. Arms are around each others back, but not really touching anywhere else. like the letter A. Birthday hug was in my office and about the same, but I think I had machine parts on the floor. I was building stuff. Between those two there was a day that I brought her a shake. The night before she mentioned wanting one, but the place is closed when she gets out of work and she doesn't have much money. I planned to bring her one the next day. Then got a message from her asking me to bring her one because she was having a bad day. F'ing mind reader, she is. I later got the best hug of my life in front of the guy I planned to write about next. She fit. We were like two puzzle pieces that always belonged together.
The past pictures of her were a little round. She occasionally mentions being fat. Usually when she is in a grumpy mood. I always insist she isn't. I always figured 'maybe it is just her loose shirt, pretty eyes, wicked smile, and/or soft hair distracting me from it.' because I wasn't seeing it. One day (months ago) in the bar she wasn't in the mood for me, not my fault. I had to be there for other reasons. She said it, I said she wasn't. She said it again, I said somewhat angrily "Stop it, you are not fat. At all." This was in front of a lot of people we work with. No one else had been responding to her statement.
---
So, as I said, we are standing outside. Kitchen girl mentioned she at one point got really anorexic. Jamaican counter guy said she did. This is the point where I realized that they had actually known each other before we worked together. They are the same age. Had no idea. Also, changed my whole idea of what was actually happening when she said she was fat. Really wasn't often enough for me to even think about, nor mention before. Always like a minor few second thing once in a great while.
Can't describe how this feels. Girl really needed to hear that she wasn't fat. No one else in her life seemed to catch it. Yes, I do this all the time... but the reason she was saying it was not at all what I had thought it was. Need to rethink a lot of what had gone on over the last several months. Along with what Jamaican Counterguy was trying to tell me. I think he may have been testing me for her. To see what my response to his 'I would bang her' comment would be.