>:O
Yeah, so, I officially hate my hair.
I wish I didn't have hair. Or that my hair just magically did awesome things without my help.
But no really, I sort of am disgusted by it. Thank God it's just the bangs that I fucked up. If I had actually gone and cut my hair like I had been planning to (on and off) then I think I would be crying right now.
I cannot get over how absolutely horrid it looks. The only reason I'm not changing it back to my old bangs right the fuck now is because, wow, when I changed my hair, a crap load of people were like, "OMG, HUGE IMPROVEMENT," in the most sincere way possible. But that only made me think that they found my original bangs to be unbearable. This, they can handle, but the old bangs... eeg.
Ok. I'm over this. I'm over trying to make my hair look better. I just want it to look like me again. Just not quite as ugly (but I think I'm asking for too much there).
I think what I'll end up doing it putting them all forward again and just thickening them up just a tiny, tiny bit. I won't curl them so much like I used to. Or maybe I'll have them sort of wisping in one direction, just with no part.
I almost don't even care about what else to do, I just need something else.
I hate hate hate hate my hair. I hate hate hate hate my clothes. I hate hate hate hate that I feel plain just being my normal self, though.
I hate that I feel like I don't fit with anyone but me and my best friends because of the way I look (normally--not with this GAYTARDED hair).
I hate that I feel like I poser either way I go.
I hate that when I want to venture out, it just gets smacked in my face that my place is close in.
I will never be what I want to be and I wish that it never bothered me. Sometimes it doesn't, but when I go to shows, I feel like a loser. I feel like there are people always looking at me thinking, "Geez, just go back home and do your homework, you little homeschooler." I hate that people can see how naive I am. I hate that I can see if I watch myself on video.
I hate hate hate my hair. I hate hate hate that my appearance matters in the world (and even more that it matters to me). I hate hate hate how right Anne was.
I wish I didn't have hair. Or that my hair just magically did awesome things without my help.
But no really, I sort of am disgusted by it. Thank God it's just the bangs that I fucked up. If I had actually gone and cut my hair like I had been planning to (on and off) then I think I would be crying right now.
I cannot get over how absolutely horrid it looks. The only reason I'm not changing it back to my old bangs right the fuck now is because, wow, when I changed my hair, a crap load of people were like, "OMG, HUGE IMPROVEMENT," in the most sincere way possible. But that only made me think that they found my original bangs to be unbearable. This, they can handle, but the old bangs... eeg.
Ok. I'm over this. I'm over trying to make my hair look better. I just want it to look like me again. Just not quite as ugly (but I think I'm asking for too much there).
I think what I'll end up doing it putting them all forward again and just thickening them up just a tiny, tiny bit. I won't curl them so much like I used to. Or maybe I'll have them sort of wisping in one direction, just with no part.
I almost don't even care about what else to do, I just need something else.
I hate hate hate hate my hair. I hate hate hate hate my clothes. I hate hate hate hate that I feel plain just being my normal self, though.
I hate that I feel like I don't fit with anyone but me and my best friends because of the way I look (normally--not with this GAYTARDED hair).
I hate that I feel like I poser either way I go.
I hate that when I want to venture out, it just gets smacked in my face that my place is close in.
I will never be what I want to be and I wish that it never bothered me. Sometimes it doesn't, but when I go to shows, I feel like a loser. I feel like there are people always looking at me thinking, "Geez, just go back home and do your homework, you little homeschooler." I hate that people can see how naive I am. I hate that I can see if I watch myself on video.
I hate hate hate my hair. I hate hate hate that my appearance matters in the world (and even more that it matters to me). I hate hate hate how right Anne was.