Pregnancy update
So...yesterday, my wife and I went to see her girlie-stuff doctor for a regular pregnancy checkup. Everything was good, and everything was normal...or so they say.
Then they decide to check the heartbeat of the baby by putting a microphone down her pants. I'm only 10% joking here, that's how they did it, with a speaker resting on her stomach, and a mic mostly down her pants. It took them a remarkably short amount of time to find the baby's heartbeat, but when they did, that's when it hit me: the kid isn't mine. Apparently, behind my back, my wife has been having an affair with a hummingbird or a rabbit. Despite the doctor's protestations that 170BPM is normal, I have begun a strict regimen of eating carrots and sucking sweet liquids through a straw, in the hopes that I can be more like what she likes.
*sigh*
Then they decide to check the heartbeat of the baby by putting a microphone down her pants. I'm only 10% joking here, that's how they did it, with a speaker resting on her stomach, and a mic mostly down her pants. It took them a remarkably short amount of time to find the baby's heartbeat, but when they did, that's when it hit me: the kid isn't mine. Apparently, behind my back, my wife has been having an affair with a hummingbird or a rabbit. Despite the doctor's protestations that 170BPM is normal, I have begun a strict regimen of eating carrots and sucking sweet liquids through a straw, in the hopes that I can be more like what she likes.
*sigh*