TMI (Zhao/Ozai)
Title: TMI
Characters/Pairing: Iroh, Zuko, Zhao (Zhao/Ozai)
Rating: PG
Warning: crack-ish
Word Count: 424
Iroh and Zuko were awestruck as they inspected the damage to the ship. The Avatar truly was a force of nature. Zuko felt even more frustrated with himself for underestimating the child. Zhao's presence was another unwelcome surprise for them that day. Not only that, he was no longer a mere Captain, he was a Commander. Iroh hadn't a clue how the man raised so quickly in rank, or found them so quickly. But he had his theory yet hoped he was wrong.
After being forced to wait for hours on end, curiosity got to the old man. He waited until after Zuko was out of hearing range. Hoping to get Zhao talking, he nonchalantly commented, "This is a quite a place you have. You've seem to be going up in rank rather quickly."
"Yes, indeed it is," Zhao replied with more than a dash of arrogance. "I deserved no less for the favors I preformed for your brother."
"Er - Favors?!" Iroh exclaimed in digust. He wished he had just kept his mouth shut. The last thing he wanted was for Zhao to elaborate.
Zhao examined the horrified looked on the old retired General. He boasted, as loud as he could, so that Zuko could hear as well, "We're lovers!"
Zuko entered the room hurriedly and announced, "The ship ready, let's go Uncle Iroh."
"Thank goodness," Iroh muttered grumpily. He couldn't bear being in the room with that blowhard another minute.
~8~8~8~8~
"Uh - Uncle, What was that about?" Zuko asked, unsure of how to broach the subject.
Uncle Iroh looked boggled, "What?"
"The lover remark I heard," replied the prince. “Zhao shouted that word.”
"Oh, that - well- uh - Zhao was just explaining how he seduced - er - another," Iroh informed his nephew, hoping that would satisfy the teenager's curiosity enough.
Zuko looked confused at his uncle.
"It's not that man's fault," Iroh said, unsure of how much Zuko knew. "He has a weakness to men with Zhao's style of facial hair. It was only a matter of time before someone figured out and exploited his flaw."
Zuko's jaw dropped, he knew exactly who Iroh was referring to. It was his father. It was clear as day that Ozai had an obsession with men with the big burly sideburns. He would always surround himself with men of that nature as his advisors. It was why the Fire Lord always looked forward to war meetings.
"Uncle, let us never speak of this day again," Zuko requested.
"Yes, never again is good."