(no subject)
So I went to El Torito and downed 2 cadillac margaritas 'cause I felt so crappy about what the damn women at the store said (I cut and pasted below from what I posted on anorexia babes about what they said). I am really self conscious about my body, I don't need other people criticizing it - I do that enough myself. So now I have a buzz going - doesn't really make me feel better though. My guy was like "consider the source, and there is no way I would be asking that woman to get naked in front of me - I think you look great" - he is so good - he tells me that he doesn't think I need to lose any more weight but to do what I want. He knows I have no self control over crackers - I will eat a whole box if I have them so I don't buy them. So one night I asked him to bring me crackers cause my stomach hurt - so he did and we both ate a few and then when he left he said "are you going to eat the whole box when I leave?" - which was so great because my plan had been to send all but a couple home with him when he left but I had forgotten and that reminded me.
I had the absolute worst time. I went to the bra store - I have to go to a special store because I wear a 30 E and you can't find them at regular stores (let me just say that the right size bra can make you look ten pounds lighter!). The bra store carries regular sizes but also the really small and large sizes - so all the oddly sized women go there. On weekends it is a mob seen cause they have fitters that help you and you have to wait forever for one to be available. So I was waiting with all the other women - standing in a small store so people were pretty close to each other and they were all morbidly obese - 350 pounds or so - and they couldn't stand for long and were all out of breath and it just made me think "please stop eating!" - but I know how hard it is to get in the groove of weight loss!!! It was really motivating for me though to stay on track! So I bought a couple of bras and I finally found a sports bra in my size that is cute and that I can wear with shorts - so I wore it out with my shorts and waited in the checkout line. This woman and her daughter were behind me and they started talking about me and said "She is too skinny, it is amazing she has and boobs left - she looks SICK". I felt horrible. What the hell - my weight is in the middle of the healthy range for my height and they are morbidly obese and calling ME sick looking? I was so stressed out I came home because I couldn't stand being around people. I was going to go to them gym but didn't want anyone looking at me after that and my stomach feels all nauseous now.
I had the absolute worst time. I went to the bra store - I have to go to a special store because I wear a 30 E and you can't find them at regular stores (let me just say that the right size bra can make you look ten pounds lighter!). The bra store carries regular sizes but also the really small and large sizes - so all the oddly sized women go there. On weekends it is a mob seen cause they have fitters that help you and you have to wait forever for one to be available. So I was waiting with all the other women - standing in a small store so people were pretty close to each other and they were all morbidly obese - 350 pounds or so - and they couldn't stand for long and were all out of breath and it just made me think "please stop eating!" - but I know how hard it is to get in the groove of weight loss!!! It was really motivating for me though to stay on track! So I bought a couple of bras and I finally found a sports bra in my size that is cute and that I can wear with shorts - so I wore it out with my shorts and waited in the checkout line. This woman and her daughter were behind me and they started talking about me and said "She is too skinny, it is amazing she has and boobs left - she looks SICK". I felt horrible. What the hell - my weight is in the middle of the healthy range for my height and they are morbidly obese and calling ME sick looking? I was so stressed out I came home because I couldn't stand being around people. I was going to go to them gym but didn't want anyone looking at me after that and my stomach feels all nauseous now.