(no subject)
The other night I drove about two miles whilst totally by myself (twice! That makes four miles!) and didn't die, crash, fail, suck, or anything of that nature. I was, however, scared, because it was dark and I am a paranoid freak when it's dark and I'm alone. Could be anything/one out there at night! We live in a scary area that my brain thinks is probably ideal for vampires / scary murderer people / weird wild animals, even though none of that stuff has ever turned up thus far. Unless a massive dog that's like almost as tall as I am counts as a weird wild animal, because it was sitting in the middle of the road as if it sort of wanted to get hit, but I did not hit it, and thus won.
Lately everyone keeps sniping at me about my lack of, erm, things most people have at my age (insert any or all of the following: boyfriend, license, car, job, education, life, home, ragingly epic dishes/laundry skillz, etc.), and it's getting old. Because my automatic instinct is always to do the exact opposite of what people want or expect of me if they go about it in a mean / unpleasant sort of way, like I mentioned previously with the "defiantly happy" thing. Basically if they upset me and want me to change something / expect me to respond a certain way, that's my way of getting back at them. So my insides say to resist getting a job, education, etc, simply to annoy people, but I know that's a bad idea, so... internal conflict! Aaah! I'm compromising with myself by continuing to ignore humanity's pleas at me to have a boyfriend / procreate at some point in life / pick a "stable career" (what's even considered "stable" these days anyway?). Because I don't want or need those, so I'm allowed to not-have them in an effort to annoy my family a little bit.
...Re-reading that paragraph, I feel very much like a strange and unusual person with a problem. But it's not really as crazy as it sounds, I swear.
In other news I had a weird dream last night, and I woke up thinking my kitten was going to kill me when she jumped on me, as a result. And that was at four in the morning, and I've been awake ever since, for some reason. Am now taking my medicine at night instead of in the mornings, to see if it helps when I'm not a completely medicated zombie all day. Which would be great, really. Fingers crossed.
Mall today - movie and spending money, probably. Tralala.
Lately everyone keeps sniping at me about my lack of, erm, things most people have at my age (insert any or all of the following: boyfriend, license, car, job, education, life, home, ragingly epic dishes/laundry skillz, etc.), and it's getting old. Because my automatic instinct is always to do the exact opposite of what people want or expect of me if they go about it in a mean / unpleasant sort of way, like I mentioned previously with the "defiantly happy" thing. Basically if they upset me and want me to change something / expect me to respond a certain way, that's my way of getting back at them. So my insides say to resist getting a job, education, etc, simply to annoy people, but I know that's a bad idea, so... internal conflict! Aaah! I'm compromising with myself by continuing to ignore humanity's pleas at me to have a boyfriend / procreate at some point in life / pick a "stable career" (what's even considered "stable" these days anyway?). Because I don't want or need those, so I'm allowed to not-have them in an effort to annoy my family a little bit.
...Re-reading that paragraph, I feel very much like a strange and unusual person with a problem. But it's not really as crazy as it sounds, I swear.
In other news I had a weird dream last night, and I woke up thinking my kitten was going to kill me when she jumped on me, as a result. And that was at four in the morning, and I've been awake ever since, for some reason. Am now taking my medicine at night instead of in the mornings, to see if it helps when I'm not a completely medicated zombie all day. Which would be great, really. Fingers crossed.
Mall today - movie and spending money, probably. Tralala.