waking up when it's dark
the spirits are recruiting people again.
i think maybe my body is against me right now,
scared scared scared.
then sad and then ashamed of being sad and not knowing how to deal with it. and scared again.
i hear little mice squeaking in my house!
i think that if he bothers with me again today i'm going to just leave and never go back, i can take another class next semester and be alright, if i have to.
it's hilarious to think that this person who is in an institution teaching you about how people's souls were murdered by institutional education can be such a fascist.
i'm probably also bitter, because i know that i want to be in control of my time and don't feel like i always can be.
i wonder if i will run away.
i have been having to tell myself over and over that sometimes you lose your shit and it is okay and no one gives up on you.
i think maybe my body is against me right now,
scared scared scared.
then sad and then ashamed of being sad and not knowing how to deal with it. and scared again.
i hear little mice squeaking in my house!
i think that if he bothers with me again today i'm going to just leave and never go back, i can take another class next semester and be alright, if i have to.
it's hilarious to think that this person who is in an institution teaching you about how people's souls were murdered by institutional education can be such a fascist.
i'm probably also bitter, because i know that i want to be in control of my time and don't feel like i always can be.
i wonder if i will run away.
i have been having to tell myself over and over that sometimes you lose your shit and it is okay and no one gives up on you.