I believe in god
I distant myself from the extreme which makes me wonder if that makes me myself extreme. I have never really considered myself anyone religion. I just followed whatever whenever...with the hopes of being enlightened...
Yesterday at my aunt Laura's wake I cried for almost an hour straight. I never would of thought that I had that many tears. But one thought after another kept coming through. My family posted pictures of everyone in this family even extended family members. But what broke my heart the most was seeing the picture of Samuel I gave to Laura 2 Christmases ago. I thought to myself after all this fighting for visitation the one person in this world I wanted to hold and love my son the most was her. And he will never get the chance to feel her warm embrace. I went up to her casket and I knelt for quite awhile asking her to look over him. Then something strange happened...I witnessed goosebumps on her arms it was for a brief second...just long enough for me to have my mother witness them. I felt like she was listening. This is so hard ...and I don't think I can ever forgive those people down south for keeping Samuel from me and from people like my aunt Laura.
Laura's burial is in a few hours. I will be one of the pole bearers. It is a grim honor, but it is what she would want.
Yesterday at my aunt Laura's wake I cried for almost an hour straight. I never would of thought that I had that many tears. But one thought after another kept coming through. My family posted pictures of everyone in this family even extended family members. But what broke my heart the most was seeing the picture of Samuel I gave to Laura 2 Christmases ago. I thought to myself after all this fighting for visitation the one person in this world I wanted to hold and love my son the most was her. And he will never get the chance to feel her warm embrace. I went up to her casket and I knelt for quite awhile asking her to look over him. Then something strange happened...I witnessed goosebumps on her arms it was for a brief second...just long enough for me to have my mother witness them. I felt like she was listening. This is so hard ...and I don't think I can ever forgive those people down south for keeping Samuel from me and from people like my aunt Laura.
Laura's burial is in a few hours. I will be one of the pole bearers. It is a grim honor, but it is what she would want.