Fic: Connecting the Dots 12/19; AU; PG (language)
Title: Connecting the Dots: Chapter 9 - 12/19 (completed)
Chapter Pairing: Evan/Jason, Rodney
Chapter Rating: PG (language)
Chapter Word Count: 1975
Chapter Summary: Evan and Rodney forge a friendship
Chapter Timeline: Tao of Rodney, The Game, Sunday
Notes: Connecting the Dots is a look at Evan's journey throughout Stargate. Overall it's approximately 38,000 words, with chapter ratings mostly hovering between PG-13 and NC-17. I began this some time ago (>1 year) and it was initially betaed by
fififolle and
whytewytch4 who provided great feedback on plot, punctuation and a host of other issues. (Thanks!) Any remaining issues are completely attributable to me.
“Hey, Doc. I’ve been trying to find you. I just wanted to say thanks for saving our asses.”
“Yeah, now that you believe me,” Rodney says as he rolls his eyes.
“Anyway, how’re you feeling?”
“Fine for now.” As Evan takes a spot next to him at the balcony rail, Rodney gives him a sidelong glance. “But why do you care? It’s not like we’re friends or anything.”
Though Rodney would never say it out loud, Evan’s words from that night in the mountain still hurt. Admittedly he would only consider his team, Elizabeth, Carson and Radek true friends. However, knowing that Evan, the second in command of the military, third in line for control of the city, doesn’t like him annoys him more than it should. It doesn’t help that he has knowledge of Evan’s previous career. With such intimate knowledge he feels he should know the guy better. Yet each time he tries to be friendly it seems his own mouth gets in the way and the encounter ends in frustration.
“That may be true but it doesn’t mean I want to see you hurt, McKay. And, no, we may not be friends but I do think you’re a good guy.”
“Thanks,” Rodney says grudgingly.
They continue to stand staring out at the ocean in companionable silence for a few minutes before Evan speaks again.
“When we were back on Earth because the Ancients kicked us out -”
“Evicted us,” Rodney interrupts with a chuckle.
“What?”
Rodney shakes his head. “Nothing. Sorry, you were saying?”
“Anyway, I lost someone I considered a friend. I’ve lost soldiers under my command before - the first time, my reaction was a bit embarrassing - but in all my years in the program I had never lost anyone close. This time it made me realize how fleeting life is, especially around here.
“Rodney.” Evan takes a deep breath. “I hope everything works out for the best. But if things get worse I want you to know that I do like and respect you…no matter how much you piss me off.” Evan turns a teasing grin to Rodney.
“That’s…uh, that’s nice of you to say. Thank you.”
“I guess my point is that I would like to be your friend.”
“Easy to say when you know I’ll only be around for another week.” Even as he says it he mentally berates himself for the comment. “Not a good way to try to make a friend,” he thinks.
“It’s not that,” Evan says more forcefully than he expected. “I’m used to having you around. No, that’s not right, either.” He shakes his head and grunts in frustration. “Rodney, I know you’re not a natural gene carrier but I can feel you through the city. You, Sheppard, Beckett and the others, you’re all a part of me. I didn’t realize it until we were…evicted.” He winks at Rodney though he doesn’t understand the joke. “But when we got back here it felt like home. I had always thought it was the city that I felt but now I know it’s you. Not just you,” he corrects himself, “all of you. The carriers. The city just facilitates it. I was aware of everyone in the mountain to a lesser extent -”
“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Rodney interrupts. “Kind of like feeling the sun during the day while inside. You may not be able to see it or its effects but you know it’s there and that it’s something…big.”
“Yeah. But here I know it’s you. It’s John, Carson...you’re all a part of me and I like it.” Evan’s voice softens and he gives Rodney a comforting look. “My point is: I like having you around, Rodney, and I don’t want to see you go.”
“That’s…that’s, uh…thanks.” Rodney is struck by the depth and genuine emotion of Evan’s words.
They stand for a few moments smiling at each other.
“Major - Evan,” Rodney says softly. He’s wondered if he should tell Evan about the video he has. Now that they’re taking this new step he feels he should come clean. “I have something to tell you. I -”
John comes out onto the balcony. “Okay, Rodney. Time for our session. Evan,” he greets the other man.
“Yeah, fine,” Rodney mumbles. “Thanks, Evan.”
“See ya, Doc. John,” Evan says as he watches them walk inside before turning back to the water.
---
“All hail Rodney McKay, Ruler of Geldar!” Evan says as he takes a seat across from Rodney in the mess hall. “You were a harsh but just tyrant whose rule ended prematurely.”
“Thank you, faithful subject.” Rodney laughs along with Evan. “Why are you still up?”
“Couldn’t sleep.”
“Obviously.” Rodney rolls his eyes. “Why?”
“Mostly because I’m excited about our mandatory rest day. I’ve been working on a painting -”
“You paint?”
“Yeah. Used to do it all the time growing up. My mom was an art teacher and like other kids with piano lessons I was forced to paint growing up. I used to hate it,” Evan says with passion. “Watching my friends outside playing while I was inside…I was miserable. Now, I do it for fun. I appreciate the calm it brings. I’m glad it was forced on me.”
“It was actually the opposite with me and the piano.”
“Do you still play?”
“No.” Rodney shakes his head sadly. “I used to. I haven’t done anything serious in years but when I’m back home I tinkle to make sure I still can.” He heaves a longing sigh before continuing. “I wanted to play professionally growing up, wanted nothing more than to be the next Rubenstein or Horowitz. But one of my pedagogues said it would never happen. I was ‘too technical’ she said. Gave it up then and there. My parents began steering me toward math - they were scientists,” he explains. “They never liked the idea that I would choose something so…emotional. Explains their marriage…,” he trails off.
“Well, you ought to get a keyboard or something. Start playing again. It’s obvious you miss it.”
Rodney sighs. “I do.”
“Then do it. If you want, I’ll be happy to sing along.”
“You sing, too?”
“Well…” Evan purses his lips. “I shouldn’t.”
Rodney chuckles.
“I’ve been told many times that I have the perfect voice to justify lip syncing,” Evan continues seriously. “And that I should do it. Often.”
Evan smiles at the rare sight of Rodney openly laughing.
---
After parking his car at Cheyenne Mountain Rodney climbs out of it and sees Evan’s car in a back corner of the lot with the major sitting in it. He is about to turn and go inside when he sees Evan bang on the steering wheel before lowering his head to rest on it. Though he would be the first to admit he’s not good at comforting people something about the scene makes him approach the car and tap on the window. When Evan looks up at him with scared, red, tear filled eyes he gasps.
“You okay?” Rodney asks after Evan rolls down the window.
“Does it fucking look like I’m okay?” Evan moans.
“You’ve looked better.”
“Fuck you, McKay.”
“Hey,” Rodney snaps. “I’m just trying to help you out here. If you’d rather be alone then fine, I can go.”
“No,” Evan says as Rodney turns his back. “I’m sorry.”
“Is everything okay with your family? I thought you were headed out to California?”
“I was,” Evan says. Tears begin to roll down his cheeks. “But…Jason…,” he says between gasps for air
Rodney searches through the files in his mind but he doesn’t recollect a family member of Evan’s with that name. “Jason?”
“My boy…ex…” Evan breaks down in tears again.
“Oh.” Rodney’s eyes become wide. “I didn’t know - Maybe we should take this somewhere else. My apartment is only twenty minutes away.”
Evan nods before moving to the passenger seat.
Rodney climbs in and drives to his building. Along the way he calls Radek and has him take care of the schedule for the rest of the day. When they arrive Rodney pulls Evan’s bags out of the car and ushers the man inside. After pouring both a glass of water and a dram of whiskey for each of them Rodney sits with Evan on the couch. “What’s going on?” he asks Evan.
“You’re not going to tell anyone, are you?”
“Yes,” Rodney says drily. “I brought you here so I could tell everyone myself instead of us being overheard and watched in the parking lot.”
“Not now, please.”
Evan sounds so pathetic that Rodney apologizes.
“I was going to fly out today to spend the rest of my time off with Jason.” Evan speaks looking down at the glass in his hands. “I wanted to surprise him but I decided to call to let him know I was coming in case he had plans for the next few days. Some guy answered his phone. I thought I had the wrong number at first so hung up and redialed. I got the same guy again and when I asked for Jason he said he was Jason’s partner then asked who I was. They’ve been together for eight months and he moved in four months ago. I was just there five months ago!” He breaks off in a sob before continuing. “Jason never told me and I trusted him! I really loved…”
When Evan breaks down Rodney moves across the couch and pulls Evan close, holding him. Comforting someone is new to Rodney but somehow with Evan at this moment it feels right.
“I’m sorry to dump this on you, Rodney,” Evan says between sniffles after regaining control.
“Hey,” Rodney says softly. When Evan doesn’t look at him he places a hand on Evan’s cheek guiding it to look at him. “That’s what friends are for.” He gives Evan a genuine smile.
Evan smiles back, tearing up at the tender look in Rodney’s eyes.
“No tears,” Rodney says softly as he uses a thumb to wipe Evan’s eyes. “If that asshole can’t appreciate you then he’s not the one for you.”
“Thanks. But I thought of all people he would be the one.” Evan releases a groan full of misery and frustration. “I’ve known him since college. He was my closest friend. He even became my manager, for Pete’s sake.”
“Your manager?”
“Yeah. He - nevermind.”
Rodney takes a deep breath. “Does this have anything to do with Pierce Hardy?”
“What?” Caught off guard Evan stiffens, his eyes widening in fear.
“I’ve seen some videos, Evan. I know.” There is no judgment in Rodney’s tone.
“Oh, God!” Evan wails. He tries to stand to escape but is held tightly by Rodney.
“Evan, it’s okay. I don’t care about that.”
“You’re lying! You don’t care about me! You just want to fuck me! That’s all anyone ever wants!”
“Evan,” Rodney says softly, holding tightly as Evan struggles against him. “Evan. Evan! Stop it!”
If he were really focused Evan could easily break away from Rodney but in his emotional state he just breaks down in tears again.
As Rodney holds Evan, his mind wanders. “What happened to him? Who did this to him and made him like this?” He thinks.
Because they’ve only been friends for a few months Rodney is surprised by his need to comfort Evan. The feeling is more than just a platonic desire to help soothe Evan. Rodney needs to make things better for Evan, needs to help Evan through this, needs to take the pain away. He realizes he wants to do the things for Evan that no one ever did for him. After Evan’s sobbing has stopped for a few minutes and all is quiet in the room Rodney hears Evan snoring softly. He holds Evan tighter and allows himself to fall asleep as well.
Chapter Pairing: Evan/Jason, Rodney
Chapter Rating: PG (language)
Chapter Word Count: 1975
Chapter Summary: Evan and Rodney forge a friendship
Chapter Timeline: Tao of Rodney, The Game, Sunday
Notes: Connecting the Dots is a look at Evan's journey throughout Stargate. Overall it's approximately 38,000 words, with chapter ratings mostly hovering between PG-13 and NC-17. I began this some time ago (>1 year) and it was initially betaed by
fififolle and
whytewytch4 who provided great feedback on plot, punctuation and a host of other issues. (Thanks!) Any remaining issues are completely attributable to me.
“Hey, Doc. I’ve been trying to find you. I just wanted to say thanks for saving our asses.”
“Yeah, now that you believe me,” Rodney says as he rolls his eyes.
“Anyway, how’re you feeling?”
“Fine for now.” As Evan takes a spot next to him at the balcony rail, Rodney gives him a sidelong glance. “But why do you care? It’s not like we’re friends or anything.”
Though Rodney would never say it out loud, Evan’s words from that night in the mountain still hurt. Admittedly he would only consider his team, Elizabeth, Carson and Radek true friends. However, knowing that Evan, the second in command of the military, third in line for control of the city, doesn’t like him annoys him more than it should. It doesn’t help that he has knowledge of Evan’s previous career. With such intimate knowledge he feels he should know the guy better. Yet each time he tries to be friendly it seems his own mouth gets in the way and the encounter ends in frustration.
“That may be true but it doesn’t mean I want to see you hurt, McKay. And, no, we may not be friends but I do think you’re a good guy.”
“Thanks,” Rodney says grudgingly.
They continue to stand staring out at the ocean in companionable silence for a few minutes before Evan speaks again.
“When we were back on Earth because the Ancients kicked us out -”
“Evicted us,” Rodney interrupts with a chuckle.
“What?”
Rodney shakes his head. “Nothing. Sorry, you were saying?”
“Anyway, I lost someone I considered a friend. I’ve lost soldiers under my command before - the first time, my reaction was a bit embarrassing - but in all my years in the program I had never lost anyone close. This time it made me realize how fleeting life is, especially around here.
“Rodney.” Evan takes a deep breath. “I hope everything works out for the best. But if things get worse I want you to know that I do like and respect you…no matter how much you piss me off.” Evan turns a teasing grin to Rodney.
“That’s…uh, that’s nice of you to say. Thank you.”
“I guess my point is that I would like to be your friend.”
“Easy to say when you know I’ll only be around for another week.” Even as he says it he mentally berates himself for the comment. “Not a good way to try to make a friend,” he thinks.
“It’s not that,” Evan says more forcefully than he expected. “I’m used to having you around. No, that’s not right, either.” He shakes his head and grunts in frustration. “Rodney, I know you’re not a natural gene carrier but I can feel you through the city. You, Sheppard, Beckett and the others, you’re all a part of me. I didn’t realize it until we were…evicted.” He winks at Rodney though he doesn’t understand the joke. “But when we got back here it felt like home. I had always thought it was the city that I felt but now I know it’s you. Not just you,” he corrects himself, “all of you. The carriers. The city just facilitates it. I was aware of everyone in the mountain to a lesser extent -”
“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Rodney interrupts. “Kind of like feeling the sun during the day while inside. You may not be able to see it or its effects but you know it’s there and that it’s something…big.”
“Yeah. But here I know it’s you. It’s John, Carson...you’re all a part of me and I like it.” Evan’s voice softens and he gives Rodney a comforting look. “My point is: I like having you around, Rodney, and I don’t want to see you go.”
“That’s…that’s, uh…thanks.” Rodney is struck by the depth and genuine emotion of Evan’s words.
They stand for a few moments smiling at each other.
“Major - Evan,” Rodney says softly. He’s wondered if he should tell Evan about the video he has. Now that they’re taking this new step he feels he should come clean. “I have something to tell you. I -”
John comes out onto the balcony. “Okay, Rodney. Time for our session. Evan,” he greets the other man.
“Yeah, fine,” Rodney mumbles. “Thanks, Evan.”
“See ya, Doc. John,” Evan says as he watches them walk inside before turning back to the water.
---
“All hail Rodney McKay, Ruler of Geldar!” Evan says as he takes a seat across from Rodney in the mess hall. “You were a harsh but just tyrant whose rule ended prematurely.”
“Thank you, faithful subject.” Rodney laughs along with Evan. “Why are you still up?”
“Couldn’t sleep.”
“Obviously.” Rodney rolls his eyes. “Why?”
“Mostly because I’m excited about our mandatory rest day. I’ve been working on a painting -”
“You paint?”
“Yeah. Used to do it all the time growing up. My mom was an art teacher and like other kids with piano lessons I was forced to paint growing up. I used to hate it,” Evan says with passion. “Watching my friends outside playing while I was inside…I was miserable. Now, I do it for fun. I appreciate the calm it brings. I’m glad it was forced on me.”
“It was actually the opposite with me and the piano.”
“Do you still play?”
“No.” Rodney shakes his head sadly. “I used to. I haven’t done anything serious in years but when I’m back home I tinkle to make sure I still can.” He heaves a longing sigh before continuing. “I wanted to play professionally growing up, wanted nothing more than to be the next Rubenstein or Horowitz. But one of my pedagogues said it would never happen. I was ‘too technical’ she said. Gave it up then and there. My parents began steering me toward math - they were scientists,” he explains. “They never liked the idea that I would choose something so…emotional. Explains their marriage…,” he trails off.
“Well, you ought to get a keyboard or something. Start playing again. It’s obvious you miss it.”
Rodney sighs. “I do.”
“Then do it. If you want, I’ll be happy to sing along.”
“You sing, too?”
“Well…” Evan purses his lips. “I shouldn’t.”
Rodney chuckles.
“I’ve been told many times that I have the perfect voice to justify lip syncing,” Evan continues seriously. “And that I should do it. Often.”
Evan smiles at the rare sight of Rodney openly laughing.
---
After parking his car at Cheyenne Mountain Rodney climbs out of it and sees Evan’s car in a back corner of the lot with the major sitting in it. He is about to turn and go inside when he sees Evan bang on the steering wheel before lowering his head to rest on it. Though he would be the first to admit he’s not good at comforting people something about the scene makes him approach the car and tap on the window. When Evan looks up at him with scared, red, tear filled eyes he gasps.
“You okay?” Rodney asks after Evan rolls down the window.
“Does it fucking look like I’m okay?” Evan moans.
“You’ve looked better.”
“Fuck you, McKay.”
“Hey,” Rodney snaps. “I’m just trying to help you out here. If you’d rather be alone then fine, I can go.”
“No,” Evan says as Rodney turns his back. “I’m sorry.”
“Is everything okay with your family? I thought you were headed out to California?”
“I was,” Evan says. Tears begin to roll down his cheeks. “But…Jason…,” he says between gasps for air
Rodney searches through the files in his mind but he doesn’t recollect a family member of Evan’s with that name. “Jason?”
“My boy…ex…” Evan breaks down in tears again.
“Oh.” Rodney’s eyes become wide. “I didn’t know - Maybe we should take this somewhere else. My apartment is only twenty minutes away.”
Evan nods before moving to the passenger seat.
Rodney climbs in and drives to his building. Along the way he calls Radek and has him take care of the schedule for the rest of the day. When they arrive Rodney pulls Evan’s bags out of the car and ushers the man inside. After pouring both a glass of water and a dram of whiskey for each of them Rodney sits with Evan on the couch. “What’s going on?” he asks Evan.
“You’re not going to tell anyone, are you?”
“Yes,” Rodney says drily. “I brought you here so I could tell everyone myself instead of us being overheard and watched in the parking lot.”
“Not now, please.”
Evan sounds so pathetic that Rodney apologizes.
“I was going to fly out today to spend the rest of my time off with Jason.” Evan speaks looking down at the glass in his hands. “I wanted to surprise him but I decided to call to let him know I was coming in case he had plans for the next few days. Some guy answered his phone. I thought I had the wrong number at first so hung up and redialed. I got the same guy again and when I asked for Jason he said he was Jason’s partner then asked who I was. They’ve been together for eight months and he moved in four months ago. I was just there five months ago!” He breaks off in a sob before continuing. “Jason never told me and I trusted him! I really loved…”
When Evan breaks down Rodney moves across the couch and pulls Evan close, holding him. Comforting someone is new to Rodney but somehow with Evan at this moment it feels right.
“I’m sorry to dump this on you, Rodney,” Evan says between sniffles after regaining control.
“Hey,” Rodney says softly. When Evan doesn’t look at him he places a hand on Evan’s cheek guiding it to look at him. “That’s what friends are for.” He gives Evan a genuine smile.
Evan smiles back, tearing up at the tender look in Rodney’s eyes.
“No tears,” Rodney says softly as he uses a thumb to wipe Evan’s eyes. “If that asshole can’t appreciate you then he’s not the one for you.”
“Thanks. But I thought of all people he would be the one.” Evan releases a groan full of misery and frustration. “I’ve known him since college. He was my closest friend. He even became my manager, for Pete’s sake.”
“Your manager?”
“Yeah. He - nevermind.”
Rodney takes a deep breath. “Does this have anything to do with Pierce Hardy?”
“What?” Caught off guard Evan stiffens, his eyes widening in fear.
“I’ve seen some videos, Evan. I know.” There is no judgment in Rodney’s tone.
“Oh, God!” Evan wails. He tries to stand to escape but is held tightly by Rodney.
“Evan, it’s okay. I don’t care about that.”
“You’re lying! You don’t care about me! You just want to fuck me! That’s all anyone ever wants!”
“Evan,” Rodney says softly, holding tightly as Evan struggles against him. “Evan. Evan! Stop it!”
If he were really focused Evan could easily break away from Rodney but in his emotional state he just breaks down in tears again.
As Rodney holds Evan, his mind wanders. “What happened to him? Who did this to him and made him like this?” He thinks.
Because they’ve only been friends for a few months Rodney is surprised by his need to comfort Evan. The feeling is more than just a platonic desire to help soothe Evan. Rodney needs to make things better for Evan, needs to help Evan through this, needs to take the pain away. He realizes he wants to do the things for Evan that no one ever did for him. After Evan’s sobbing has stopped for a few minutes and all is quiet in the room Rodney hears Evan snoring softly. He holds Evan tighter and allows himself to fall asleep as well.