Wow!

[spaceageblues]

Best/ worst things to say on a first date.

1. How do you feel about non-consenting third parties?
2. I just got tested for the clap this past Monday. Fingers crossed!
3. Once I found a tick on my balls.
4. You're my first date in eight years -- my boyfriend died in prison.
5. I forgot my wallet at home -- could you cover this?
6. I could get you some coke if you give me a reeeaaally good blow job.
7. Yoko Ono ruined the Plastic Ono band. (thanks HS)
8. I think Hitler was a visionary.
9. Can you talk dirty to me over dinner or is that not your scene?
10. I love you.
11. You look so sweet when you're asleep.
12. Wanna go halfsies on an abortion?
13. Coochie coochie coo.
14. You got some nice DSL lips there.
15. We are the knights who say "ni".
16. I live on the main line.
17. PETA is my life
18. I'm a vegan
19. I'm sorry, I didn't see you there -- that waitress -- mmm.
20. Tupac was such a badass.

I suggest you add. Everyone's got shitty worst-first-date lines.

P.S. I need a jogging buddy, or a biking buddy, who will understand I am super out of shape and be patient with my fat white ass.