First Hit [English//Audio//Open Commentlog]

[soyouwannaplay]

Okay, asswipes. I’ve seen Saw, I know what you’re trying to do here. And it’s not cute. What have you done with Kick-Ass? We’re kind of in the middle of something. Jesus, he’s such a little bitch… He’s probably tied to a chair again. If you’ve done anything to him, you cunts are going to have another thing coming.

By the way, the walkie talkies

Comments

[iwitnessdamsel]

[Whoa, Jesus. That's quite the potty mouth.]

Hi, this is April O'Neil. I'm a reporter from New York. I'm a prisoner, just like you are. The communicator can let you talk to our kidnappers, but mostly it's a way to keep the kidnapped in contact with one another.

It may help if I explain what's going on in person. Are you at the inn right now?

[soyouwannaplay]

[Oh, good, a reporter. The last thing she needs at this point is the press to talk to. But unfortunately she can probably help.]

Well, I just got here, lady. But from what I've seen, looks like a hotel. Goddammit, where's the way out?

[Kidnapped... Hit Girl cringes inwardly. She can't help thinking Daddy would be disappointed.]

[iwitnessdamsel]

Try to find the elevator. That'll take you to the ground floor. I'll be waiting in the lobby. There aren't many red-heads here--shouldn't be hard to find me.

[soyouwannaplay]

[She attaches her comm onto her belt and goes for a gun--which isn't there. What? Her knives, guns, everything's gone. Which only serves to piss her off more as she steps onto the elevator and tucks herself into the front corner next to the door. At least she still has a few stun and smoke bombs that she was going to use at D'Amico's place.

When the elevator slows to a stop, she waits a few moments for gunshots. Bullets, knives, something should be flying through the open doors. When nothing happens, she risks a look out into the lobby. Oddly enough, there's nothing dangerous. At least, not in plain sight.

Ready to throw a stun bomb at a moment's notice, Hit Girl slips out of the elevator and presses her back against the wall. Where's this damn reporter? After the night's events, Hit Girl is sure this is another sick plot of D'Amico's.]

[iwitnessdamsel]

[April's hanging around in the lobby, watching the elevators. She can see all this cautionary bullshit from where she's standing, and after it becomes obvious the little girl--the REALLY little girl--really is acting like she's in danger, she just heads on over.]

Hello? It's April. You don't...need to worry. There's nothing dangerous out here.

['Cept her fashion sense. At least it actually MAKES SENSE for April to be running around in shorts now. They just...happen to be very ugly shorts.]

[soyouwannaplay]

[Hit Girl's sharp eyes are on April even before she speaks and she's ready to attack at any moment. This April could be someone working for D'Amico. Can never be sure.

Her eyes flick around the lobby, inspecting, as she speaks.]

Nothing dangerous, sure. And I've just been kidnapped and had all my weapons stolen by fucking Care Bears.

[Her eyes land back on April and she looks her up and down with a grimace. What the hell is this chick wearing? And what happened to her hair?]

[iwitnessdamsel]

While the sarcasm is adorable, it'll help me if you would give me a little more credit, here. I've been in this situation for several months.

I promise you, for the time being, you're safe. Especially if you're talking and hanging around me. I have some friend who would be very upset if anyone tried to start something, and--

[She puts up a hand before little miss purple prema-scowl can protest.]

I'm guessing you know how to take care of yourself.

[soyouwannaplay]

Good guess. [Letting the 'adorable' comment slide, she visibly relaxes when she can't see anyone else in the lobby, including a lack of movement in all hiding places. The stun bomb stays in her hand, though.]

Since you're obviously not carrying a gun, I'm just going to ask now. And I'll be able to tell if you're lying. You working for D'Amico?

[iwitnessdamsel]

No. It's not a name I'm familiar with, either. I don't think he's among the passengers.

[Could be she's from a different version of Earth, could be she's from 1990. Take your pick, squirt.]

[soyouwannaplay]

[She's met with the most confused look ever.] You've never heard of Frank D'Amico? And you're from New York? Are you deaf, dumb, and blind?

[Hit Girl rolls her eyes and pushes past April towards the door, moving cautiously through the lobby as though someone will attack her at any given moment.]

[iwitnessdamsel]

Obviously not.

[Have an eye-roll, little girl.]

Have you ever heard of the Foot Clan?

[soyouwannaplay]

[She throws a disgusted look back at April over her shoulder.] No, but it sounds like they've got a pretty gross kink. What, are you a part of it?

[iwitnessdamsel]

It was a ninja clan operating out of New York in the late eighties, early nineties. Most of the operations were carried out by kids not much older than you.

So...what should I call you?

[soyouwannaplay]

Like me? Must have been some threat, then. [She's never heard of them. Granted, she was born in 1999, but Daddy never even mentioned anything like ninjas in New York.]

You can call me Hit Girl. Now tell me where I can find this Captain Redd. [The other little girl informed her that the captain is the man to talk to.

When she gets to the door, she opens it and glances out. Instantly, she's struck motionless and speechless. What are those... stone... pig things? And are those fucking lobsters?]

[iwitnessdamsel]

[Those are Fucking Lobsters. And they're very pretty colors, aren't they?]

I don't know where to find him. I'm assuming he's still on the ship with the rest of the crew. They're currently fixing the ship we're usually detained on. This--

[She motions to the island.]

Is our pit-stop. Get used to the weird, it's here to stay.

[soyouwannaplay]

[This sight has made her drop nearly all securities and she backs away from the doors, a hand moving to her head.]

That's not possible. Lobsters are red and not that size. And what the fuck are those pig things?

[She looks accusingly at April.] What kind of fucked up acid trip is this? What the hell did you people do to me?