(no subject)
I went snowboarding today with Brian. I had private lessons and my "teacher" was like whoa. (o, and sorry I havent writen in a while) He was fine, but thats not what atracted me. He was so sweet kind, and just whoa. He was only 18. Oh man, and dude, I got his #! He lives around me too! Isnt that great! He was like, call me when your 17, then we can hook up. But, he said that we can still hang out now, I guess. Anyway, I have been like super sad, its crushing me. I was crying out of contol a few minutes ago. I hate me. But then I dont. Its weird. I have the test tomorrow, to get into Faith. They called and said that here was an opening. Im not really scared, but I cant help but wonder what they will think of how I look, if nobody will want to hang out with me for that or anything. Its bullshit. and I HATE being 12. A stupid 12 year old who doesnt know anything. whats up with that? I dont feel 12. I dont think I act 12, most the time. but still. do you know how bad i wanna trust somebody and have a best friend? I dont think you do. people are shit, and thats the truth. maybe some arent, but most, yes. they dont need to live, there is no reason for them, they wont accomplish anything. and one of those people is probably me......