Sleepless, helpless, but thinking of you.
What if you slept? And what if, in your sleep, you dreamed? And what if, in your dream, you went to heaven and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower? And what if, when you awoke, you had the flower in your hand? Ah, what then?
Coleridge
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The shower came rushing down onto me. The water went down on me as it attempted to wash my thoughts away. Perhaps there was tears, perhaps there wasn't, but all I knew was that there was water. I was drowning in my thoughts. If every one of it were to be a drop of water, then I would be submerging myself in the boundless ocean.
It was a choice to make. To face my ex or to move away or to pretend that we were total strangers? My friend successfully persuaded me to go clubbing with them. Somehow I fear to meet my ex there. But again I know that I wanted to see him there and yet I don't.
Ever had that feeling that you are lost between your thoughts? As if every one is a blade driving through your skull? That you are lost. That you are confused. That there was no Time. You are lost in your own eternal world. All you know is nothing, and nothing isn't nothing?
I was desperate. In pain. Not those you feel with your skin. But those there, inside you. There, in your heart. The pain hurt so much that you felt crammed and nausea. I recognised this pain. It's call heartache.
I begged for guidance. I begged for choices. If there is a Being above that sees me through then I begged him for a light to shine through my never ending tunnel. Let me see at least Light, at least Hope.
Then you called, from where you were.
I understand it now.
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I realised one thing,
that Love never changes, it is the person who does.
I love my ex. There is no hiding. Sad for the one who is concerning of me. But I am human, and it's only humane. But believe, that I will and am willing to try it out. Even if the slightest chance could help the flower to bloom then we must, with our hands, cultivate it out as it is. With the very little but essentials we have, we must make it grow. Allow me to learn to love again. Allow me to walk the road again with your courage and trust.
Whatever happened, I understand, was only a yesterday. Time can never move backwards. I will never be back to where I was from.
Whatever that might happen, I know, will only be a tomorrow. Tomorrow can never be trusted because it as always as perfect as how we envisioned it to be.
What is now is now. Trust me when I hold your hand, it is real that I am holding your hand. You are mine and I am yours. Other than that time doens't matter. No one else matters. Nothing else matters.
Coleridge
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The shower came rushing down onto me. The water went down on me as it attempted to wash my thoughts away. Perhaps there was tears, perhaps there wasn't, but all I knew was that there was water. I was drowning in my thoughts. If every one of it were to be a drop of water, then I would be submerging myself in the boundless ocean.
It was a choice to make. To face my ex or to move away or to pretend that we were total strangers? My friend successfully persuaded me to go clubbing with them. Somehow I fear to meet my ex there. But again I know that I wanted to see him there and yet I don't.
Ever had that feeling that you are lost between your thoughts? As if every one is a blade driving through your skull? That you are lost. That you are confused. That there was no Time. You are lost in your own eternal world. All you know is nothing, and nothing isn't nothing?
I was desperate. In pain. Not those you feel with your skin. But those there, inside you. There, in your heart. The pain hurt so much that you felt crammed and nausea. I recognised this pain. It's call heartache.
I begged for guidance. I begged for choices. If there is a Being above that sees me through then I begged him for a light to shine through my never ending tunnel. Let me see at least Light, at least Hope.
Then you called, from where you were.
I understand it now.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I realised one thing,
that Love never changes, it is the person who does.
I love my ex. There is no hiding. Sad for the one who is concerning of me. But I am human, and it's only humane. But believe, that I will and am willing to try it out. Even if the slightest chance could help the flower to bloom then we must, with our hands, cultivate it out as it is. With the very little but essentials we have, we must make it grow. Allow me to learn to love again. Allow me to walk the road again with your courage and trust.
Whatever happened, I understand, was only a yesterday. Time can never move backwards. I will never be back to where I was from.
Whatever that might happen, I know, will only be a tomorrow. Tomorrow can never be trusted because it as always as perfect as how we envisioned it to be.
What is now is now. Trust me when I hold your hand, it is real that I am holding your hand. You are mine and I am yours. Other than that time doens't matter. No one else matters. Nothing else matters.