Can I scream yet? And can this night get any worse?
So, my sister and I had our biggest fight is what seems like over a year now.
According to her, I have deliberately and intentionally put every person of my family down, have called them stupid specifically, and am a colossal bitch. I am also lazy, and apparently "refuse to grow up". (I have taken out swear words as there are just too many). Also, my bf has apparently told her that I can only be dealt with by being allowed to vent and then to be left alone, with him agreeing on me being a bitch (he and I will be having a long chat rather soon about this.) I don't respect any of my family members, refuse to support them, and refuse to listen to them.
*deep breath, trying to remain calm and failing*
I would like to know precisely how and when I have told specific people that I thought they were stupid. I have heard this comment a lot from my sister and my older brother that I have apparently said this to both of them, but most of my conversations with them involves me giving monosyllabic answers such as "yeah, uhhun, okay, sure".
I would also like to know when have they EVER supported me and what I do. NONE of my siblings have EVER come to my choir concerts (and there have been many). NONE of my siblings have EVER cared about what I do because I don't EVER get the chance to tell them what I am doing because I am listening to how cute this dog is, or what an asshole this person at work is from them.
I get told that my bf surprising me with flowers one morning is creepy, not sweet...well, that is just one thing he does. He likes surprising me with little things, even though I have told him that I don't need any of it.
Apparently, me trying to talk with my brothers who hide in their rooms most of the time equals me being an ostrich who hides in her room when people insult me to the point where I refuse to take it any longer. Road go two ways here people.
Also, I would like to point out that I have been called stupid for attending my university, stupid for accepting a promise ring, stupid for going out with someone who is nine years my senior, stupid for choosing to become an author, stupid for not having a career the minute i got out of school, stupid that I did not get 3.5 GPA instead of the 3.44 GPA that I did get, stupid for choosing to pursue my love of singing and writing, stupid for having to move back home after school, stupid for not knowing everything, stupid for every little thing imaginable. I am tired of this crap.
Most of the conversations I have had with my siblings in the past four years have been me listening to the same stories that they always tell, and then me having to go do homework or stuff because I know they don't care because they cannot see the immediate result of what I do. I am tired of being the odd girl out. I am tired of being told I take things way too personally. I am tired of having them try to manipulate my life and my decisions with who I share it with. I am tired that me wanting to read is seen as me being antisocial when I know they don't want to talk to me anyways. I am tired of being called a bitch when I try to have a positive outlook, try to listen and support everyone, but I can't be mom. I am not their mother, nor do I wish to be a mother for quite a few years. I am tired of my introvert-ness being taken as anti-social, odd, me being a bitch.
I am tired of this bull shit.
According to her, I have deliberately and intentionally put every person of my family down, have called them stupid specifically, and am a colossal bitch. I am also lazy, and apparently "refuse to grow up". (I have taken out swear words as there are just too many). Also, my bf has apparently told her that I can only be dealt with by being allowed to vent and then to be left alone, with him agreeing on me being a bitch (he and I will be having a long chat rather soon about this.) I don't respect any of my family members, refuse to support them, and refuse to listen to them.
*deep breath, trying to remain calm and failing*
I would like to know precisely how and when I have told specific people that I thought they were stupid. I have heard this comment a lot from my sister and my older brother that I have apparently said this to both of them, but most of my conversations with them involves me giving monosyllabic answers such as "yeah, uhhun, okay, sure".
I would also like to know when have they EVER supported me and what I do. NONE of my siblings have EVER come to my choir concerts (and there have been many). NONE of my siblings have EVER cared about what I do because I don't EVER get the chance to tell them what I am doing because I am listening to how cute this dog is, or what an asshole this person at work is from them.
I get told that my bf surprising me with flowers one morning is creepy, not sweet...well, that is just one thing he does. He likes surprising me with little things, even though I have told him that I don't need any of it.
Apparently, me trying to talk with my brothers who hide in their rooms most of the time equals me being an ostrich who hides in her room when people insult me to the point where I refuse to take it any longer. Road go two ways here people.
Also, I would like to point out that I have been called stupid for attending my university, stupid for accepting a promise ring, stupid for going out with someone who is nine years my senior, stupid for choosing to become an author, stupid for not having a career the minute i got out of school, stupid that I did not get 3.5 GPA instead of the 3.44 GPA that I did get, stupid for choosing to pursue my love of singing and writing, stupid for having to move back home after school, stupid for not knowing everything, stupid for every little thing imaginable. I am tired of this crap.
Most of the conversations I have had with my siblings in the past four years have been me listening to the same stories that they always tell, and then me having to go do homework or stuff because I know they don't care because they cannot see the immediate result of what I do. I am tired of being the odd girl out. I am tired of being told I take things way too personally. I am tired of having them try to manipulate my life and my decisions with who I share it with. I am tired that me wanting to read is seen as me being antisocial when I know they don't want to talk to me anyways. I am tired of being called a bitch when I try to have a positive outlook, try to listen and support everyone, but I can't be mom. I am not their mother, nor do I wish to be a mother for quite a few years. I am tired of my introvert-ness being taken as anti-social, odd, me being a bitch.
I am tired of this bull shit.