You are my dream (and the crack in my heart)
★Title: You are my dream (and the crack in my heart) for baekhannies ♡
★Pairing: Kyungsoo/Kai
★Rating: pg-13
★Length: 2535 words
★Warnings/Disclaimers: character deaths, lots of blood, non-chronological plot. opps.
★Author’s notes/Messages for the recipient: the line is from two men in love by the irrepressibles. Lots of thanks to v and a for their help ;u; Sorry for the mess i hope i did justice to the prompt!
★Summary: hitman!au. We are two names borrowed, two hearts pained, two lost souls bounded by barrel of the gun.
Be quick, load and shoot.
Bang.
Kyungsoo stares at his reflection, eyes blank and smile faltering. There's nothing left, nothing for him to grasp onto. Just lingering fragments of his dream, delusion-consumed reality blinds him and he starts laughing, voice tinted with pain and bitterness. Ugly, he sees flaws everywhere and the cracks are slowly revealing themselves, overshadowing the last of his smile. His disheveled hair cradles his blood-shot eyes with brown tangles, Kyungsoo wraps the end of his hair around his finger and he closes his eyes, tongue barely tasting the sweetness from his memory of the distant past. The touch lingers and it hurts.
Dreams are lies, empty images that give nothing but anguish for him to look at.
"Will you love me again?"
Kyungsoo glazes the cold mirror with his fingers, his lips quivering and the memory comes back, like a sting and it stays forever.
"Because I still do."
If I asked you now, will you be my prince,
will you lay down your armour and be with me forever?
"What's your dream?"
Kyungsoo hums, tapping his fingers against his arms playfully. The figure shifts closer and he rests his head on Kyungsoo's shoulder.
"I don't have one," he mutters softly, his breath brushing against Kyungsoo's neck.
It's hard to fill the cracks of broken porcelain, even harder to conceal. Kyungsoo knows that nothing good will come from this relationship but he throws the doubts away, stashing them between his love and longing for the mysterious man. The warnings are plastered over glazing lips, whispered within each breath as their skin clashes and it paints over their tangled limbs, in splotches and splatters of red. He ignores the taste of gunpowder and bitterness, embracing the false warmth created to deceive him.
"You are my dream," Kyungsoo says, in between the lines of the cracks, hoping that the words might seal a part of them.
(But the words don't. He cracks further apart.)
-
He came when spring pranced across the window pane, coating his vision with blurs of green and blue. The scent of dew reminds Kyungsoo of their first encounter. For a moment, time became relevant and irrelevant, moving and slowing and it changes. That painful curve of his grin still haunts him and he can't seem to forget about it. His actions were like paint on a canvas, slowly etching dark into light, and light into dark, creating movements from the static, with the shadows from the form. He stopped breathing for that second, watching silently in awe.
"Do I know you?" Kyungsoo remembers asking him when their eyes met.
"You don't. But now you do." He replied with another grin. Kyungsoo found the pickup line stupid but it made his heart flip erratically.
And then they fell.
(or maybe it's just Kyungsoo falling endlessly into nothing.)
Something has been said, about how a single day can unravel in a way, where you can find the ripcord of hope again, after many twists and turns. Something has been said, about an atmosphere where happiness blooms, between the many breaths of the cool evening breeze, so palpable that you can stick your tongue out and feel it land like snowflakes. Kyungsoo feels his soul being captured by the abyss of the man's flickering eyes and and the look in his eyes constricts his chest so painfully. Beauty was filled with unnecessary pain and he feels like a masochist, getting addicted to that sculpture of perfection.
(He ignores the cracks on his surface and carries on falling.)
-
Kyungsoo wipes the red off his hands as he sinks into the man's side, blocking out the scent of blood from his mind.
"Welcome back." the man breathes out sleepily.
"You waited?" Kyungsoo chokes the words out. Lies roll of his tongue awkwardly and he smiles a little too hard. The gunshots still echoes in his head as the man embraces him tightly, wrapping his arms around his waist. Kyungsoo tries to forget for a moment, remembering nothing but the man's warmth.
But nothing good comes from a love built from lies.
(His lies and the man's lies.)
-
"You're my dream," Kyungsoo whispers. The man nods and he lets out a chuckle, the grin twitches a little at the end and it falters away, a little too quick, Kyungsoo thinks. The sound of deceit becomes his companion and he embraces it with his broken arms, tainted with a lovely shade of treachery.
"I know."
The words Kyungsoo wants to hear never came out and he realises that he was never the man's dream.
(Or was he?)
-
The act of deceit is decorated with sighs of deluded assurance, lies fabricated to satisfy him.
Kyungsoo knew.
And that's why it hurts more.
Kyungsoo ignores them all, forcing out a smile that overshadows his insecurities. He wraps his arms around him again and he shuts his eyes tightly together, pressing the tears away as he mutters 'I love you's over and over again, just like a broken record.
"I love you too," Kyungsoo hears and it sounds strangely like a lie. The lies become the truth for him, catching the broken parts of his heart and putting them together.
(But cracks are hard to fill, even harder to conceal.)
-
They both remain enigmas to each other, just like the rubik cube on his table. Nothing gets unlocked, just a mess of colours and no unity. They are both incomprehensible, just like how a dog barks and a wolf howls, the things they shout will always be a secret hidden in their own language.
"Hey, I have something to tell you," the man says one day.
The unraveling of the puzzle destroys the beliefs he had build around him. It appears as a little bump or imperfection against the smooth surface and Kyungsoo can't help but flinching. The slight jerk breaks him apart, and he slips out of Kyungsoo's grip like silk.
"I lied. Sorry."
Kyungsoo mutes the words out of his mind, he can't see the words the man was mouthing.
What he sees is three words.
I love you.
Kyungsoo smiles as he swallows the lies for the nth time.
(He ignores the frown on the man's face.)
-
Fingers pressed against cold metal, the silent thumping of his chest, it screams against his ribs and Kyungsoo forgets, who he is and what he is here for. Kyungsoo thinks he looks different from that memory in his heart, there isn't a smile on his face and his hair isn't in his favourite shade of brown. The dull black of his hair numbs him a little, making him dizzy. Nothing is familiar. There is panic written on the man's face, accompanied with a little bit of fear but strangely no love lingers in that empty gaze. Kyungsoo's chest starts to ache.
"Don't do it, Kyungsoo. Don't."
Kyungsoo chuckles loudly. It was never his to begin with, that broken sculpture.
"It's nice seeing you again, Jongin."
-
Kyungsoo knew who he was, right from the very beginning. Jongin was his assignment.
"Kill him, he knows too much about the company. He's dangerous."
Kyungsoo finds it hard to pull that trigger. He abandoned that notion, the moment their eyes met. The brown orbs that glowed gently under the sun's gaze, his heart decided that it would be ugly if they get stained in crimson paint. The sounds of death seeping out of Jongin are a nightmare he has dreaded so very much. Kyungsoo doesn't want to paint the colour of death on his corpse.
Lying is a habit he had for a long time, strangely it became a chore and a challenge when Jongin appeared in his life.
He can't do this anymore.
He has to stop.
(Kyungsoo doesn't notice the barrel of the gun behind his head and the lies Jongin breathes out.)
-
"0112, where are you?" a voice beeps out from Jongin's device.
Kyungsoo's grip on the gun loosens a little, eyes tracing the curves of Jongins face. Kyungsoo remembers the lovely contrast of his pale fingers against the tanned cheeks and how his lips felt against his, and he remembers how much he had loved him. The static noise gets louder and Kyungsoo wakes up from the forgotten dream. He furrows his brows together, lifting the barrel of the gun in Jongin's direction.
"Answer them, 0112. Tell them where we are. Or will you lie again?"
Jongin's eyes darken and he lets out a bitter laugh.
"I wasn't the only one lying."
"Ha, you knew didn't you? You were sent to kill me and I was sent to kill you," Kyungsoo spits out, his hands start trembling a little and he bites hard on his lips, "But I loved you. That destroyed me." His facade cracks off, bit by bit, as he watches Jongin's face morph into something he once yearned for. Jongin's expression softens and he tosses his gun to the ground.
"There is one thing I regret lying about."
-
Kyungsoo buries the gun deep inside his heart, under the weight of his past. He was going to quit working for the company. No more killing, he swears, for Jongin and for himself.
"You're making a mistake."
Kyungsoo finds that funny because everything was a mistake, right from the beginning. The way Jongin makes everything wrong right, the way he makes everything okay, even when it’s not. He has never questioned Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo lets that go on. That’s the biggest wrong he has ever committed and he can never go back. This is the decision he has made and no one can change his mind..
"Do you think it's that easy to leave us?"
"Didn't think it was. That's why I brought this."
And the dance of the fallen red starts. With every twirl and bend of the ember spit, a gaping hole remains, coated with an ugly stain of red and black. Kyungsoo licks away the red dripping down the edge of his lips. The familiar taste becomes strangely bitter, maybe it's because he wasn't looking forward to the sweetness of the blood shower anymore. Things are not like before.
Kyungsoo prays that this would be his final show.
But the show will never end. It will never stop. Memories are scary little bites of the nightmare Kyungsoo wants to forget. The broken faces of the people whom he had once called family, he'll never forget them.
"I'm sorry." is the only solace he could offer. Before he leaves, he pats the dust off himself, letting it fall into the crimson mess as he leaves the grotesque scene behind. Not a single breath of farewell remains.
Reports of an alleged massacre at the east building of Goyang.
-
"I loved you. I really did," Jongin says gently. Kyungsoo's lips slowly curve up into a smile and he closes his eyes, letting out a sharp breath. Jongin takes a few steps forward, moving closer to Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo drops his arms down to his sides and leans back onto the ledge of the building.
(Kyungsoo can’t tell if it’s another lie.)
-
"Kyungsoo, what happened?" Jongin shouts through the door, knocking on it repeatedly. Kyungsoo drops the bloodied clothes to the floor and he enters the tub silently, letting the water rinse the blood away. He watches the traces of his past float away from him and it mixes with the water, like vines and they tangle around him. The water overflows when Kyungsoo shifts in the water, it drips over the tub and it flows into the cracks of the tiles. Kyungsoo buries his face in his hands, attempts to forget. The door clicks and swings open. Kyungsoo looks up and sees Jongin standing at the door. He stares at Kyungsoo with wide eyes as he slowly makes his way to the blood-stained tub.
"What did you--" he asks in a shaky voice.
"I know you work for the police."
Jongin falls silent, the ends of his sentence is left hanging. Kyungsoo chuckles softly, reaching for the gun at the edge of the tub.
"Killed them all with this little thing."
Jongin's face stiffens as Kyungsoo shove the gun into his hands. Jongin looks at him, face pale with fear. "What the fuck did you do?"
"They wanted me to kill you. So I had to leave but they wouldn't let me." Kyungsoo doesn't notice the tears rolling down his cheeks until he feels Jongin's fingers on his face.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," Jongin mutters over and over again, pressing his forehead against Kyungsoo's. Kyungsoo shakes his head and leans forward, silencing him with a kiss. The water splashes out of the tub and Jongin's clothes gets with drenched in the crimson water. His lips taste like blood and everything Kyungsoo hates but he finds it all strangely comforting.
"It's alright. As long as you're here."
Jongin's face becomes blank, all the traces of emotion are gone. Kyungsoo finds himself holding his breath.
"No you don't understand. You have to leave now."
-
Love, the definition of it differs for everyone. But for Kyungsoo, it's something that forces him to breathe, something that he wakes up for.
"I have something to tell you."
Love is something he once needed, to be alive, something he was willing to die for. He had lied for it, killed for it, did everything for it, it is the reason why he was ruined.
"I lied. I'm sorry."
Love becomes the wrecker of his dreams, the reason that ruined him.
"I never loved you. Please leave."
Love becomes the poison of his life, the reason why he wants to die so badly.
"Forget about me."
Love leaves him and he breaks.
(Jongin breaks along with him.)
-
"The police were coming to get you. If I hadn't said that, you wouldn't have left me. I really tried. I tried holding them back. I lied to them again and again but it didn't work."
Kyungsoo feels Jongin's arms around him and opens his eyes. Kyungsoo thinks he looks different. His back hair is too dark to his liking and there are new wrinkles around the the corners of his eyes, but there are still parts of him that have remained unchanged. The way his arms fit around Kyungsoo’s waist, the way his smile curves into that perfect bend, and the cracks, it's still there, all of it. Kyungsoo still sees it. Jongin is perfect for him, in the most imperfect world.
"I can’t love you, I really can’t. We were never meant to be. "
“That’s why I’m here.”
“What are you talking about? You need to leave. They’ll find you soon.”
"Love me,” Kyungsoo pleads, ‘I’m here now aren’t I? We can run away from all this and be happy."
"How? When will we ever be happy?" Jongin chokes out. Kyungsoo rests his hands at the sides of Jongin's face and he presses his lips against his. The lips taste like freedom and everything he had dreamt of.
Kyungsoo is ready.
He leans closer, resting his head on Jongin's shoulder.
"In our next lives."
And he pulls the trigger.
The dream he once had shatters forever.
Two bodies found at the rooftop of the police headquarters.
★Pairing: Kyungsoo/Kai
★Rating: pg-13
★Length: 2535 words
★Warnings/Disclaimers: character deaths, lots of blood, non-chronological plot. opps.
★Author’s notes/Messages for the recipient: the line is from two men in love by the irrepressibles. Lots of thanks to v and a for their help ;u; Sorry for the mess i hope i did justice to the prompt!
★Summary: hitman!au. We are two names borrowed, two hearts pained, two lost souls bounded by barrel of the gun.
Be quick, load and shoot.
Bang.
Kyungsoo stares at his reflection, eyes blank and smile faltering. There's nothing left, nothing for him to grasp onto. Just lingering fragments of his dream, delusion-consumed reality blinds him and he starts laughing, voice tinted with pain and bitterness. Ugly, he sees flaws everywhere and the cracks are slowly revealing themselves, overshadowing the last of his smile. His disheveled hair cradles his blood-shot eyes with brown tangles, Kyungsoo wraps the end of his hair around his finger and he closes his eyes, tongue barely tasting the sweetness from his memory of the distant past. The touch lingers and it hurts.
Dreams are lies, empty images that give nothing but anguish for him to look at.
"Will you love me again?"
Kyungsoo glazes the cold mirror with his fingers, his lips quivering and the memory comes back, like a sting and it stays forever.
"Because I still do."
If I asked you now, will you be my prince,
will you lay down your armour and be with me forever?
"What's your dream?"
Kyungsoo hums, tapping his fingers against his arms playfully. The figure shifts closer and he rests his head on Kyungsoo's shoulder.
"I don't have one," he mutters softly, his breath brushing against Kyungsoo's neck.
It's hard to fill the cracks of broken porcelain, even harder to conceal. Kyungsoo knows that nothing good will come from this relationship but he throws the doubts away, stashing them between his love and longing for the mysterious man. The warnings are plastered over glazing lips, whispered within each breath as their skin clashes and it paints over their tangled limbs, in splotches and splatters of red. He ignores the taste of gunpowder and bitterness, embracing the false warmth created to deceive him.
"You are my dream," Kyungsoo says, in between the lines of the cracks, hoping that the words might seal a part of them.
(But the words don't. He cracks further apart.)
-
He came when spring pranced across the window pane, coating his vision with blurs of green and blue. The scent of dew reminds Kyungsoo of their first encounter. For a moment, time became relevant and irrelevant, moving and slowing and it changes. That painful curve of his grin still haunts him and he can't seem to forget about it. His actions were like paint on a canvas, slowly etching dark into light, and light into dark, creating movements from the static, with the shadows from the form. He stopped breathing for that second, watching silently in awe.
"Do I know you?" Kyungsoo remembers asking him when their eyes met.
"You don't. But now you do." He replied with another grin. Kyungsoo found the pickup line stupid but it made his heart flip erratically.
And then they fell.
(or maybe it's just Kyungsoo falling endlessly into nothing.)
Something has been said, about how a single day can unravel in a way, where you can find the ripcord of hope again, after many twists and turns. Something has been said, about an atmosphere where happiness blooms, between the many breaths of the cool evening breeze, so palpable that you can stick your tongue out and feel it land like snowflakes. Kyungsoo feels his soul being captured by the abyss of the man's flickering eyes and and the look in his eyes constricts his chest so painfully. Beauty was filled with unnecessary pain and he feels like a masochist, getting addicted to that sculpture of perfection.
(He ignores the cracks on his surface and carries on falling.)
-
Kyungsoo wipes the red off his hands as he sinks into the man's side, blocking out the scent of blood from his mind.
"Welcome back." the man breathes out sleepily.
"You waited?" Kyungsoo chokes the words out. Lies roll of his tongue awkwardly and he smiles a little too hard. The gunshots still echoes in his head as the man embraces him tightly, wrapping his arms around his waist. Kyungsoo tries to forget for a moment, remembering nothing but the man's warmth.
But nothing good comes from a love built from lies.
(His lies and the man's lies.)
-
"You're my dream," Kyungsoo whispers. The man nods and he lets out a chuckle, the grin twitches a little at the end and it falters away, a little too quick, Kyungsoo thinks. The sound of deceit becomes his companion and he embraces it with his broken arms, tainted with a lovely shade of treachery.
"I know."
The words Kyungsoo wants to hear never came out and he realises that he was never the man's dream.
(Or was he?)
-
The act of deceit is decorated with sighs of deluded assurance, lies fabricated to satisfy him.
Kyungsoo knew.
And that's why it hurts more.
Kyungsoo ignores them all, forcing out a smile that overshadows his insecurities. He wraps his arms around him again and he shuts his eyes tightly together, pressing the tears away as he mutters 'I love you's over and over again, just like a broken record.
"I love you too," Kyungsoo hears and it sounds strangely like a lie. The lies become the truth for him, catching the broken parts of his heart and putting them together.
(But cracks are hard to fill, even harder to conceal.)
-
They both remain enigmas to each other, just like the rubik cube on his table. Nothing gets unlocked, just a mess of colours and no unity. They are both incomprehensible, just like how a dog barks and a wolf howls, the things they shout will always be a secret hidden in their own language.
"Hey, I have something to tell you," the man says one day.
The unraveling of the puzzle destroys the beliefs he had build around him. It appears as a little bump or imperfection against the smooth surface and Kyungsoo can't help but flinching. The slight jerk breaks him apart, and he slips out of Kyungsoo's grip like silk.
"I lied. Sorry."
Kyungsoo mutes the words out of his mind, he can't see the words the man was mouthing.
What he sees is three words.
I love you.
Kyungsoo smiles as he swallows the lies for the nth time.
(He ignores the frown on the man's face.)
-
Fingers pressed against cold metal, the silent thumping of his chest, it screams against his ribs and Kyungsoo forgets, who he is and what he is here for. Kyungsoo thinks he looks different from that memory in his heart, there isn't a smile on his face and his hair isn't in his favourite shade of brown. The dull black of his hair numbs him a little, making him dizzy. Nothing is familiar. There is panic written on the man's face, accompanied with a little bit of fear but strangely no love lingers in that empty gaze. Kyungsoo's chest starts to ache.
"Don't do it, Kyungsoo. Don't."
Kyungsoo chuckles loudly. It was never his to begin with, that broken sculpture.
"It's nice seeing you again, Jongin."
-
Kyungsoo knew who he was, right from the very beginning. Jongin was his assignment.
"Kill him, he knows too much about the company. He's dangerous."
Kyungsoo finds it hard to pull that trigger. He abandoned that notion, the moment their eyes met. The brown orbs that glowed gently under the sun's gaze, his heart decided that it would be ugly if they get stained in crimson paint. The sounds of death seeping out of Jongin are a nightmare he has dreaded so very much. Kyungsoo doesn't want to paint the colour of death on his corpse.
Lying is a habit he had for a long time, strangely it became a chore and a challenge when Jongin appeared in his life.
He can't do this anymore.
He has to stop.
(Kyungsoo doesn't notice the barrel of the gun behind his head and the lies Jongin breathes out.)
-
"0112, where are you?" a voice beeps out from Jongin's device.
Kyungsoo's grip on the gun loosens a little, eyes tracing the curves of Jongins face. Kyungsoo remembers the lovely contrast of his pale fingers against the tanned cheeks and how his lips felt against his, and he remembers how much he had loved him. The static noise gets louder and Kyungsoo wakes up from the forgotten dream. He furrows his brows together, lifting the barrel of the gun in Jongin's direction.
"Answer them, 0112. Tell them where we are. Or will you lie again?"
Jongin's eyes darken and he lets out a bitter laugh.
"I wasn't the only one lying."
"Ha, you knew didn't you? You were sent to kill me and I was sent to kill you," Kyungsoo spits out, his hands start trembling a little and he bites hard on his lips, "But I loved you. That destroyed me." His facade cracks off, bit by bit, as he watches Jongin's face morph into something he once yearned for. Jongin's expression softens and he tosses his gun to the ground.
"There is one thing I regret lying about."
-
Kyungsoo buries the gun deep inside his heart, under the weight of his past. He was going to quit working for the company. No more killing, he swears, for Jongin and for himself.
"You're making a mistake."
Kyungsoo finds that funny because everything was a mistake, right from the beginning. The way Jongin makes everything wrong right, the way he makes everything okay, even when it’s not. He has never questioned Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo lets that go on. That’s the biggest wrong he has ever committed and he can never go back. This is the decision he has made and no one can change his mind..
"Do you think it's that easy to leave us?"
"Didn't think it was. That's why I brought this."
And the dance of the fallen red starts. With every twirl and bend of the ember spit, a gaping hole remains, coated with an ugly stain of red and black. Kyungsoo licks away the red dripping down the edge of his lips. The familiar taste becomes strangely bitter, maybe it's because he wasn't looking forward to the sweetness of the blood shower anymore. Things are not like before.
Kyungsoo prays that this would be his final show.
But the show will never end. It will never stop. Memories are scary little bites of the nightmare Kyungsoo wants to forget. The broken faces of the people whom he had once called family, he'll never forget them.
"I'm sorry." is the only solace he could offer. Before he leaves, he pats the dust off himself, letting it fall into the crimson mess as he leaves the grotesque scene behind. Not a single breath of farewell remains.
Reports of an alleged massacre at the east building of Goyang.
-
"I loved you. I really did," Jongin says gently. Kyungsoo's lips slowly curve up into a smile and he closes his eyes, letting out a sharp breath. Jongin takes a few steps forward, moving closer to Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo drops his arms down to his sides and leans back onto the ledge of the building.
(Kyungsoo can’t tell if it’s another lie.)
-
"Kyungsoo, what happened?" Jongin shouts through the door, knocking on it repeatedly. Kyungsoo drops the bloodied clothes to the floor and he enters the tub silently, letting the water rinse the blood away. He watches the traces of his past float away from him and it mixes with the water, like vines and they tangle around him. The water overflows when Kyungsoo shifts in the water, it drips over the tub and it flows into the cracks of the tiles. Kyungsoo buries his face in his hands, attempts to forget. The door clicks and swings open. Kyungsoo looks up and sees Jongin standing at the door. He stares at Kyungsoo with wide eyes as he slowly makes his way to the blood-stained tub.
"What did you--" he asks in a shaky voice.
"I know you work for the police."
Jongin falls silent, the ends of his sentence is left hanging. Kyungsoo chuckles softly, reaching for the gun at the edge of the tub.
"Killed them all with this little thing."
Jongin's face stiffens as Kyungsoo shove the gun into his hands. Jongin looks at him, face pale with fear. "What the fuck did you do?"
"They wanted me to kill you. So I had to leave but they wouldn't let me." Kyungsoo doesn't notice the tears rolling down his cheeks until he feels Jongin's fingers on his face.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," Jongin mutters over and over again, pressing his forehead against Kyungsoo's. Kyungsoo shakes his head and leans forward, silencing him with a kiss. The water splashes out of the tub and Jongin's clothes gets with drenched in the crimson water. His lips taste like blood and everything Kyungsoo hates but he finds it all strangely comforting.
"It's alright. As long as you're here."
Jongin's face becomes blank, all the traces of emotion are gone. Kyungsoo finds himself holding his breath.
"No you don't understand. You have to leave now."
-
Love, the definition of it differs for everyone. But for Kyungsoo, it's something that forces him to breathe, something that he wakes up for.
"I have something to tell you."
Love is something he once needed, to be alive, something he was willing to die for. He had lied for it, killed for it, did everything for it, it is the reason why he was ruined.
"I lied. I'm sorry."
Love becomes the wrecker of his dreams, the reason that ruined him.
"I never loved you. Please leave."
Love becomes the poison of his life, the reason why he wants to die so badly.
"Forget about me."
Love leaves him and he breaks.
(Jongin breaks along with him.)
-
"The police were coming to get you. If I hadn't said that, you wouldn't have left me. I really tried. I tried holding them back. I lied to them again and again but it didn't work."
Kyungsoo feels Jongin's arms around him and opens his eyes. Kyungsoo thinks he looks different. His back hair is too dark to his liking and there are new wrinkles around the the corners of his eyes, but there are still parts of him that have remained unchanged. The way his arms fit around Kyungsoo’s waist, the way his smile curves into that perfect bend, and the cracks, it's still there, all of it. Kyungsoo still sees it. Jongin is perfect for him, in the most imperfect world.
"I can’t love you, I really can’t. We were never meant to be. "
“That’s why I’m here.”
“What are you talking about? You need to leave. They’ll find you soon.”
"Love me,” Kyungsoo pleads, ‘I’m here now aren’t I? We can run away from all this and be happy."
"How? When will we ever be happy?" Jongin chokes out. Kyungsoo rests his hands at the sides of Jongin's face and he presses his lips against his. The lips taste like freedom and everything he had dreamt of.
Kyungsoo is ready.
He leans closer, resting his head on Jongin's shoulder.
"In our next lives."
And he pulls the trigger.
The dream he once had shatters forever.
Two bodies found at the rooftop of the police headquarters.