"Pull the plug, aint he the one who.....
...who pulled the rug/ he's lower than an ally cat dirty rat and i flatter....." ( "Forget about the Boy", Thourougly Modern Millie)
I'm having one of those, 'everything reminds me of him" kind of weeks. that's right, weeks...not days, or memories out of the blue kind of moments. but week. And it's the smallest of things that'll trigger a memory. And i get that happy feeling remembering that moment, or day...and then reality comes crashing down.
I've been talking to this friend...good kid. Not what i expected. And i don't know, when i talk to him it as if i can just spill everything, and not worry about being judged, or becoming the new gossip. Well i might be the new gossip, bu t i really don't care. But the thing is, they're friends...kind of. And even after things were told, to see if a "fight" would be put up, (and there wasn't), there was that hope. But by the looks of things, everything could change. i get more support and understand from this friend than i did him. And i'm not bitter, okay maybe a little, and there's nothing but brotherly love for this kid, there's this connection, i think. And there's a part of me that hopes there maybe a twing of jealously, hiding in the background, i dobut it, and it's horrible to think/want, but that's just me. I'm not just this kid either, i was going to, and then i came to my senses. It's a friendship that i never expected,but i'm glad that i have it and that it's here.
And after reading over this i have realized, that this makes absoulutlt no sense....i did in my head at least.
I'm having one of those, 'everything reminds me of him" kind of weeks. that's right, weeks...not days, or memories out of the blue kind of moments. but week. And it's the smallest of things that'll trigger a memory. And i get that happy feeling remembering that moment, or day...and then reality comes crashing down.
I've been talking to this friend...good kid. Not what i expected. And i don't know, when i talk to him it as if i can just spill everything, and not worry about being judged, or becoming the new gossip. Well i might be the new gossip, bu t i really don't care. But the thing is, they're friends...kind of. And even after things were told, to see if a "fight" would be put up, (and there wasn't), there was that hope. But by the looks of things, everything could change. i get more support and understand from this friend than i did him. And i'm not bitter, okay maybe a little, and there's nothing but brotherly love for this kid, there's this connection, i think. And there's a part of me that hopes there maybe a twing of jealously, hiding in the background, i dobut it, and it's horrible to think/want, but that's just me. I'm not just this kid either, i was going to, and then i came to my senses. It's a friendship that i never expected,but i'm glad that i have it and that it's here.
And after reading over this i have realized, that this makes absoulutlt no sense....i did in my head at least.