really and truly about to whine like a bitch.
Everything is boring and everything is wasteful. Everything is a very vague word. It makes me generalize things in a dangerous way that makes my eyes hurt and my head spin and keeps my legs antsy so much so that I can't sleep and I type dribble on here. I spend my days and all my energy on things that are pointless and fruitless and that give me nothing and take me nowhere. I am prepared to do nothing, and I want to do nothing. I know less of what I want now than when this all started. There's no time for anything that makes me happy or fulfilled, and time is filled to the brim with things that are composed entirely of stress and suck. I will never amount to anything worth mentioning. I am another victim of Orange County low expectations. I've pushed myself to finish this to move on to the next thing that I'll have to push myself to finish, only to finish and be worn out from all the pushing, and have the pushing be all that I remember of any of it anyway. Some people are destined to glide through life, and some people have to push. But actually, there are a few gentle moments, moments that are easy to miss, moments that everyone gets either subtly or directly. And in those moments you have a chance to choose. I saw some pass and some went without my knowing. Either way, my chances are up... I somehow know that now.
you've just been bitchwhined. to be fair, you were warned.
you've just been bitchwhined. to be fair, you were warned.