38 weeks 6 days...
I was really hoping you would come, moon baby... but you are currently nice and snug inside me while I eat yummy food and listen to the Beatles. I can feel your little hands and big butt rubbing against me. It's pretty incredible. These last few weeks have been quite trying on me, physically and mentally. Allergies are out of control bad, and I can't take the strong stuff. The bruins are playing right now, game 7! They are behind 2-1. I spent the afternoon at mom and dads, watched some tv, relaxed. It's been okay, I mean.. not working is still kind of strange. I'll take naps during the day and wake up not knowing if it's morning/night.. even today I'm like, "what day is it?".. it's kind of nice to be off the grid. I'm just about done with your crocheted blankie (yes another one). Last night I got dinner with Sarah, our friend/doula. She is the best. She totally calms me and is so full of knowledge. I'm so glad she is with use during this journey. I've decided to try to go ALL NATURAL FOR CHILDBIRTH... meaning, NO PAIN MEDS. Tavi, you'll get to know me one day, and I think one of the first things you will realize is how much of a baby I can be when I'm in pain/sick... so this decision has not been made easily! I keep thinking of the benefits for you.. and me. It's going to be a real challenge, but I keep reading more and more birth stories of women having natural unmedicated births, whether planned or not, and every single one has had no regrets and survived. Here's the thing, I'll probably feel like giving up or dying at some point.. but if I can just keep in mind that I'll be holding your little butt and I WONT DIE then I think I will be able to conquer the fear/pain. We will see. Not much longer now (I hope!)... I've been waiting for this my whole life.
Things I've been eating..
chicken burrito from poco loco
moms homemade chicken
grapefruit
GRAPES LOTS AND LOTS
Chocolate caramel with sea salt
ice cubes
Dels
P.S.
I play
red hot chilli peppers- my friends
the beatles - blackbird
smashing pumpkins- stumbleine
Beck - country down
on the guitar to you everyday.