3 years
Wow, it has been almost three years since my last update. I kind of ditched eljay for myspace....sorry. I can't really vent on myspace like I can on here...and this is where everything started. So much has happened in these past years, I don't know where to start, and I don't even know if it is worth it.
Tuesday was our 2 year 3 month (?) anniversary. It's lame because we broke up in March, but I still like to think about it as our day. I want to forget how everything sucked and how it ended. I miss her a lot, and I would like to say that I have moved on, but I haven't. I thought that when we broke it off, everything was going to be fine, and we would still be friends. We are still friends, but I miss her so much. It sucks because she now loves someone else, and it hurts so bad to hear about them....but I want to know everything. I know it isn't my business, and I know that if I find out, it will just hurt me...but I still need to know. I seriously think I'm stupid in the head, lol. I don't know....I think I have come to terms with everything, and ultimately, I want her to be happy...which he makes her happy, so oh well. I told her that I wouldn't talk to her about it anymore; I would just write it all down if I had any issues, so maybe this will help me.
In Oct of 2006, I got hired at a company that does outsourcing. I was working there and at Albertsons for a while, but I didn't have any days off so after 3 years, I said goodbye to Albertsons. It was sad, but I needed a change. I work full time Mon-Fri, 6-3...which is tough sometimes because I have to get up at 4, but I love it. I like how everything is consistent...and it is fun. It is a call center, which I have never done before, and we take calls from customers who are interested in buying software. It is fun because we strive to be a professional sales organization, and only being 21, I have learned so much from that place that I will keep with me for the rest of my life. The only thing I don't like is how I sit on my butt all day and work on the computer. At Albertsons, I was able to walk around and do things, so I could work 5 or 6 hours with no break, but I can barely work 2 hours without a break at this place. I need to move around, lol...but I like it, and I grossed over $40,000 last year, so it works.
My brother is graduating from high school this month. I don't think he knows how proud of him I am, I never thought we would make it this far, he always seemed so rebellious, I was sure he was going to drop out. Of course he likes to have fun, but he is responsible about it, and I trust his judgment. He is going to one of the Universities in the State which is about a 2 hour drive away. I can't believe that he is actually doing all of this. When I was in high school, everyone asked me where I was going to college, and I told them I was taking a break. They all warned me not to do that because it is so hard to get back into it once you stop, which I don't know if that is entirely true. I miss school, and I want to go back, but with me living by myself and having to work full time, it is hard to imagine any extra time for school. I know that I want to go back...I just have to work my life around it.
I have been taking one class at Portland Community College, it's a music class. If you know me, you know how passionate about music I am. Any type of music, I just love it so much, it can make the hair on the back of your neck stand up, bring tears to your eyes, it is so powerful. We had a concert last night and we played a million songs. My mouth hurt so bad when I was done-I play the Tuba if you didn't already know. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. In high school, our teacher was very serious about music, and our rehearsals were very intense...and now with this instructor, everything is a lot more laid back. It is really hard sometimes because I know we can be better, but a lot of the people in the class don't apply themselves, they don't have the same determination I do, and it gets frustrating. But it is ok because it gives me the chance to play again...I haven't seriously played since 2005. While we were getting set up, my mom came up to me yesterday and told me that she realized that I had been playing for 10 years...which I'm not sure if that is true. I started in 6th grade, which I think I was 12, so that would make it 9 years, but who cares, we can round up.
So much more has happened; maybe it will come up when I update more. This is my release....I am definitely going to be on here more.
PEACE!