i crossed my fingers but i didnt beg
to make a difficult decision that causes pain for others and to not constantly question it-that is katelyn growing up. there has been a lot of change in my life lately which normally would make my whole world feel unstable and dangerous and scary but i think i am learning that without change we would never grow. we would never be challenged by life to overcome, to survive, to be a better person. i feel like i made a decision that was true to me. and one thing i have always had trouble with is being true.
on a different note. i have some things to say to someone that is no longer in my life so i will say them here.
everything i am today is based on you. you helped me see the majority of the things i know about myself, both good and bad. i am thankful for every moment i had with you and if i could go back and erase all the shit that we went through i wouldnt. you are the most significant thing that has ever happened to me.. i know now that the way i feel about you will never change, and in a way i really wont ever get over you. i carry you around with me. you are every part of who i am and i cannot let you go. so even though you may hate me for the things that i have done to you and you may not ever be able to talk to me or see me again...just know that i am always thinking of you. always forever