Accumulated E-mails: Callisto
December 25th, 2000
To: bridge.carson, callisto, m.parker, isabel.evans, willow.rosenberg, dawn.summers, alanna.trebond, aeryn.sun, samuel.anders, rory.gilmore, john.crichton, d'anna.biers, angela.chase, martin.blank, veruca.cally, samantha.carter, nadia.santos, alex.krycek, jake.gavin, peter.pevensie, peter.parker, skankzero.hopelesssavage, jenny.calendar, jaye.tyler /// @fandomhigh.net, veronica.mars@hearst.edu
From: xharris@ucsd.edu
Subject: Merry Stuffs
Happymerrypeacefulzombiefree Chrismakuhsticearoni - does that cover everybody? And I figure if I'm throwing bottles of e-mail out into the internets it's just as likely they'll make it to ancient Greece as it is that they'll hit Fandom, so Cal, if you're reading this, happy whatever the hell you guys celebrate in December too. Happy Anniversary-of-the-Strip-Triad-Game-I'm-Kinda-Sorry-I-Missed, maybe.
Willow says hi me and hi Bridge, and then she kind of shakes her head a little bit because she's still on the Oh Xander train and thinks I don't get how unlikely it is that you guys will ever see this. I do, though. Some things are just worth saying anyway, you know?
Like I passed my first semester of classes. It was touch and go for a while, but I am an actual bonafide college guy, as opposed to an actual bonafide flunkedoutofcollege guy. An actual bonafide college guy with his first actual bonafide car, too, even if it's an actual bonafide POS. And everybody here is alive and ...about as safe as you ever get in Sunnydale. (Dawn, there's a maybe on the Thing; they can't tell yet but they're checking again next week.)
Except now I ran out of news that's fit to print and doesn't involve other people's sekrits. That's one of the drawbacks about the whole never hearing back thing, aside from the obvious - all I can do is talk about me.
So instead I'll make stuff up about you guys. If I don't hear back from you I'll just assume I was right.
Let's see, it's December, so you've already had at least one invasion. This time it was MIMES. Marty, Peter Parker, Greg, Cally and Belthazor all got taken over and formed a troupe, roaming the dorms and annoying...I mean scaring the crap out of everybody who set foot in the hallways. The evil mimes were foiled when John, Sam, Nadia and Bridge joined together and built a giant invisible box around them (that dispenses cotton candy when they bang on the walls to be let out), and all the students went back to...as normal as they ever were. The mimes are still there, but no one cares because you all threw a sheet over the box and went on with your lives.
Veronica, Cal, Angel and Logan all came back for Homecoming. Angel's hair looked stupid. This is not actually news. Greg gave him a makeover, though. It still looks stupid (not Greg's fault; you can only work with what you're given), but it's taller now.
D'anna turned into a frog for a while, and had a wild fling with Jeremiah, but they broke it off even before D got turned back due to irreconcilable Vanessa Saturn shipping preferences. The Perk closed down and was replaced by a fancy mineral water store. Rory and Jake sat on the sidewalk in front of it every day for a week and LOOKED SAD AND WOEFUL at everybody who went in or out until they gave up and turned it back into a coffee shop. In not unrelated news, Krycek had a minor nervous breakdown during this period, but he's better now. He only twitches uncontrollably if you mention Evian around him.
Alanna dyed her hair black and took up smoking clove cigarettes and wearing a beret. Faithful laughed so hard he completely lost his voice, which is exactly why she did it. He was grumpy once he figured that out, but Willow and Anders cheered him up with catnip-laced cookies.
Angela dyed her hair black and took up smoking clove cigarettes and wearing a beret too, but it was a philosophical statement. Which didn't stop Faithful from laughing at her too.
Dean the Tick was seen wearing jeans and a t-shirt, which made everybody (except people from Sunnydale) wonder if the apocalypse was nigh, but no, the laundry machines were just on strike again so he couldn't wash his tights. The randomly-disappearing clothes thing happened again too, but this time it was even taking people's underwear. Jaye skipped classes to follow Constable Fraser around all week. Nobody knows for sure what happened but she was back in class on Monday and she WON'T STOP SMILING.
How'd I do?
love,
Xander
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February 14th, 2001
To: m.parker@fandomhigh.net, callisto@fandomhigh.net, samuel.anders@fandomhigh.net, rory.gilmore@fandomhigh.net
From: xharris@ucsd.edu
Subject: Valentine's Day
I'm not sending Bridge anything today, because, well. I don't know what he's doing or if he's got somebody to be doing it with, you know? I wouldn't want to screw anything up for him if it was the one lottery-winning e-mail that didn't bounce, but I don't want him to think nobody's thinking about him today either. This is me trying to be all mature and stuff, yeah, because part of me is all hi Jake, can I borrow that marker, thanks, MINE, but most of me just wants him to be happy.
So if *this* e-mail's the powerball ticket, could you guys just make sure he *is*?
love, Xander
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September 20th, 2001
To: bridge.carson, m.parker, isabel.evans, callisto /// @fandomhigh.net
From: xharris@ucsd.edu
Subject: Also, non-killination update
Yeah, I realize the other e-mail sort of does that, but if I left it there then you wouldn't know there's apparently some kind of time-space anomaly in my laundry room. Ah, good times. Unlike Fandom, didn't make people randomly naked, but Faith did end up in just a pair of shorts and a... cuppy ...strapless... black thingy that was not technically an equilibrium because it wasn't leather and now you know why you're suddenly on this mailing-list, Cal. Thought you'd appreciate the image. Not that I was really *looking* at the image...exactly, but they were she was right. there. Kind of unavoidable.
Anyhow she went down to do laundry and every time she took the clothes out of the dryer, she ended up back at the top of the steps carrying the basket down. The trick seemed to be taking off most of what she was wearing and throwing *that* in the washer too. Except when she got down to the not-equilibrium, she kicked the crap out of it (which is why I ended up heading down to "help with laundry" aka actually get my maintenance deposit back someday) and it stopped starting time over. Who knew we had pervy laundry machines in Sunnydale too?
love still unkillinatedly,
Xander
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May 3rd, 2002
To: bridge.carson, dawn.summers, m.parker, isabel.evans, callisto /// @fandomhigh.net
From: xharris@ucsd.edu
Subject: Graduation II, See Me Not Making The Boogaloo Joke? Cookies plz.
Been a while, yeah, sorry. I know I don't write as much as I did at first, 'cause at some point it got to be more about me having somebody to talk at than really believing you'd ever get them, and things are better here now - I don't need that quite as much. But I do still think about you, and sometimes there's just stuff that I couldn't say to anybody else, or I couldn't go *without* saying to you, even if you never hear it. And I'm kind of going on faith not dirty that your connection to FH is better than mine after you leave, and they'll forward this stuff on if it shows up.
So anyway yeah. In case you wondered how things are in Xander-land, it really is better. I kind of graduated too, except for the part where I'm still taking classes. The construction management thing has an associate's degree after two years, though, so I've got a piece of paper that... mostly lets me do the stuff at work that I've already been doing, and makes the boss point to me when they need a monkey in a suit to go talk to the client.
Means I get a bit more money, too, enough for a better apartment. Just the one roomie shut up, I'm so not getting into the Faith thing that is not a Thing except it kind of is with anybody but Bridge OMG now, 'cause Larry found a place of his own. Actually taking a break from unpacking, since I'm all alone and kind of bored. Buffy and Giles and said roomie took a flight to London yesterday to go talk to the Watcher's Council about ... not sending said roomie back to her previous apartment. You know, the one with the bars on the windows. Which yay, go keeping Faith out of prison and *boy* would I be staring at me like I was crazy if I saw me typing that three years ago, but it'd be awful quiet around here with her gone. Much like now.
Ought to head out to help patrol, though, since you know both Slayers out of town in May means the Hellmouth is gonna choose today to start spewing purple demonic lava or something.
love,
Xander
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March 18th, 2003
To: aeryn.sun, alanna.trebond, alex.krycek, angela.chase, belthazor, bridge.carson, callisto, cameron.mitchell, charlie.kawalsky, conner.mcknight, d'anna.biers, dawn.summers, elizabeth.delgado, hamlet.dane, isabel.evans, jake.gavin, jaye.tyler, jenny.calendar, john.crichton, m.parker, marty.blank, nadia.santos, peter.parker, peter.pevensie, phoebe.halliwell, rory.gilmore, samantha.carter, samuel.anders, veruca.cally, willow.rosenberg, zero.hopelesssavage, zoe.washburn ///@fandomhigh.net, veronica.mars@hearst.edu, cchase@nyu.edu, hotsauce@yahoo.com
From: purplefrog@yahoo.com
In case you guys heard about Sunnydale going under (or hell, maybe it happened years ago for some of you), just wanted to let you know we came through. Most of us, anyway. The world's not getting taken over by vampires, at least not this week. Faith saved us.
(That's a name; I didn't like, join a cult or something. Like Faith who used to be in Fandom, just this one was ours.)
Got to go. We're on our way to LA, just stopped for gas and the truckstop has wifi so I dragged out the keyboard since it's easier than typing on the phone. So anyway. I'm still here. Hope you're still there, wherever there might be these days.
~Xander
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