(no subject)
I went to the doctor today and it was absolutely miserable. I had to have a really long talk and I had to make up some lame excuse so that my mom didn't find out about my new cuts. I just started crying...right in the middle of my appointment. Now, I have to go to a pschiatrist(sp?) and get psychoanalyzed or something so they can put me on meds. I wish that everyone would really just stop worrying about me and just try to fix the problems that made me depressed and want to do cutting in the first place. Nothing has changed since I started and my family just seems to have gotten worse. I don't ever even hardly feel like eating anymore either. I know what I'm doing is bad, but I really can't help it. I don't even know how to explain anything thats been going on with me lately. I wish I never cut myself in the first place b/c I really can't stop feeling that it is an easy way out of my problems. I know it probably doesn't make any sense, but it's how I feel.