and it slowly creeps into my veins.

[socolove]

i hate computeres. techonology. all of it. i want to scream.
i dont know what i would do with out it. well... a lot. but AH.
it already has another virus. fucker.

tomorrow i have a test in every class.
another fucker.

this week has been close to impossible for me.
im just having a hard time with everything.
help. me.

life is so random. its so nice out side.
staring out into reality.
sort of.
its really not. we all just pretend.
what is reality even? the real world? i dont even know what world i'm living in.


bad pictures...but do you see how im happy here?

and im confined to my room. to study. i hate this. i absolutely do. i can not accept the fact that i have to study for mindless information. i think im going to just go play some piano instead. wait no. then ill fail. just like a lot of the other stuff i do in life. fail. sweet. how wonderful.

and its slowly creeping.
into my veins.
the back snaps. slowly.
cracking away.
just like my brain.
quietly dissolving.
stop the revolving.
of my heart.
it beats. then it stops.
a constant shock.
pounds to the skin.
is this even a way to live?
with out any love.
or any noticing.
walk though this life.
their voices all just ring.
and mine is nothing to everyone.
its just sits.
facing the sun.
cause that is my only hope.
through the day.
i always say
"why will things never change"
for me.

fuck.that.
shocking i am posting this post.

and although Morgan has already seen this..
I've made some revisions.

so everyone. this makes me sad.
to know you all live so far away.
like you couldn't even really imagine.


*tears*

eye <3 u. i love you. eye <3 u. i love you.