that time when kansas actually started to get decent
As promised, a more detailed breakdown of this weekend.
Friday morning started off interestingly. I got in before 8 am as always only to remember that we weren't running any panels because we were hosting an international scholar for the day, Dr. Hough from Argentina. So then I started thinking, "man, why did I bother waking up so early when I don't have anything until this afternoon?" Eventually Dr. D came in my office and told me I should get some breakfast in 147, and who am I to pass up free food?
Dr. Hough was giving a seminar all day, but I really had no idea of whether I should/was supposed to be there or not. Finally, despite how intimidated I am of him, I asked Dr. E about it in passing, and he suggested that I sit in on the seminar. What a good decision! I really don't know why I sell myself so short sometimes. I was afraid the material was going to be way over my head, but if anything, I think I was following better than even some of the Ph.D students. I answered questions well, asked thoughtful questions, and got the hang of the calculations without any problems.
Overall the day was great because it validated so much for me - my decision to do sensory analysis, to come to K-State, my interest in statistics...my intelligence. As weird as it sounds, I couldn't help but step back from the situation and think, "Wow, I'm doing this. I'm in Kansas. I'm a grad student in the best sensory program in the country. I'm learning this from a world-renowned scientist at the cutting edge of the field, and not only am I following along, but I'm fascinated and find it really cool!"
That being said, I have to wonder why I continue to have thoughts like this now, after being here for a few months. I'm not new-new, per se, but I am. I still don't fully see myself in my role as a grad student because I don't really feel any different, but is that really it? Despite the length of time I've been here, these transitional issues still have me confused and unsettled. There's the physical and emotional aspects, yes, but more than anything, it's the whole me-as-I-view-me aspect that I find most curious.
The seminar wrapped up around 5, so I had about an hour to go back and get ready before the 25th Anniversary SAC gala/event at the country club. Upon arriving, I was slightly uncomfortable because I didn't really known anybody, but I had a nice chat with the department head, some of the panelists, one of the other human nutrition faculty, etc. before finally settling in with the current sensory grad students.
Thoughts on the evening:
1) It still feels weird to have more informal relationships with staff and faculty. Cool, though.
2) I have more Asian/international friends than I have ever had
Besides Carrita, Brandon, Alisa, and myself, everybody else is from Thailand, Korea, etc. I love hanging out with them, and the crazy part is that I don't think anything of their race/background until I actually stop and become conscious of the situation. They're all ridiculous, and after a few glasses of wine each, it turned into a truly great time - silly pictures, playing with the chocolate fountain, general joking around. I love the little family we have in the program and am so grateful.
Friday morning started off interestingly. I got in before 8 am as always only to remember that we weren't running any panels because we were hosting an international scholar for the day, Dr. Hough from Argentina. So then I started thinking, "man, why did I bother waking up so early when I don't have anything until this afternoon?" Eventually Dr. D came in my office and told me I should get some breakfast in 147, and who am I to pass up free food?
Dr. Hough was giving a seminar all day, but I really had no idea of whether I should/was supposed to be there or not. Finally, despite how intimidated I am of him, I asked Dr. E about it in passing, and he suggested that I sit in on the seminar. What a good decision! I really don't know why I sell myself so short sometimes. I was afraid the material was going to be way over my head, but if anything, I think I was following better than even some of the Ph.D students. I answered questions well, asked thoughtful questions, and got the hang of the calculations without any problems.
Overall the day was great because it validated so much for me - my decision to do sensory analysis, to come to K-State, my interest in statistics...my intelligence. As weird as it sounds, I couldn't help but step back from the situation and think, "Wow, I'm doing this. I'm in Kansas. I'm a grad student in the best sensory program in the country. I'm learning this from a world-renowned scientist at the cutting edge of the field, and not only am I following along, but I'm fascinated and find it really cool!"
That being said, I have to wonder why I continue to have thoughts like this now, after being here for a few months. I'm not new-new, per se, but I am. I still don't fully see myself in my role as a grad student because I don't really feel any different, but is that really it? Despite the length of time I've been here, these transitional issues still have me confused and unsettled. There's the physical and emotional aspects, yes, but more than anything, it's the whole me-as-I-view-me aspect that I find most curious.
The seminar wrapped up around 5, so I had about an hour to go back and get ready before the 25th Anniversary SAC gala/event at the country club. Upon arriving, I was slightly uncomfortable because I didn't really known anybody, but I had a nice chat with the department head, some of the panelists, one of the other human nutrition faculty, etc. before finally settling in with the current sensory grad students.
Thoughts on the evening:
1) It still feels weird to have more informal relationships with staff and faculty. Cool, though.
2) I have more Asian/international friends than I have ever had
Besides Carrita, Brandon, Alisa, and myself, everybody else is from Thailand, Korea, etc. I love hanging out with them, and the crazy part is that I don't think anything of their race/background until I actually stop and become conscious of the situation. They're all ridiculous, and after a few glasses of wine each, it turned into a truly great time - silly pictures, playing with the chocolate fountain, general joking around. I love the little family we have in the program and am so grateful.