Putting the crack in metacrack
Because somehow SNSD managed to make their engrish days of the week lesson kind of make sense in context of the lyrics(unlike Mawsuretawv), but the more I looked at the lyrics the more hilarious and creepy I found them. Therefore they must be mocked. Used the translation from SSF. I reserve the right to be just as creepy right back in the face of such ridiculous lyrics.
"I already know, your eyes as they watch me from behind
Your foot steps as you creep up from behind me, those three red letters
Sunday feels right, my heart for some reason is trembling"
Wow, creepy stalker much? Hey, maybe your heart is trembling because you're AFRAID creepy stalkers, hmmm?I mean, if you LIKE that sort of thing who do you think you are, Bella the second? Mace the bastard already and be done with it!
Also, three red letters, guys. Three red letters. THREE. RED. LETTERS. Written in BLOOD.
They say, "fuck yoooooouuuuu, Taecyeon, here have a tampon". (In all seriousness, I'm assuming the original meaning refers to "I love you" or something like that in hangul, right? Oh lost in translation-ness, how I love thee!)
"From the first moment I saw you Just like that
That moment our eyes met You're my slave
Tomorrow I'm going to make you mine You're my destiny"
Lol, dom!shidae, huh? That boy better rundevilrun. Oh wait, that's right, the boy's a creepy stalker, he probably likes that kind of thing.
"Monday I'm sorry but I'm going to tease you just a little bit
Tuesday You're going to fall even deeper into me
For the remaining time I'll give you the love inside of me
Try to hold me, soft like cotton candy"
And so we see how SNSD's seduction plan is: be a cocktease.
It works for either interpretation of "I'll give you the love inside of me". If the innocent interpretation, then the poor dude isn't getting any at all. If the realitydirty interpretation, then they pleasure him all week only to abruptly withdraw every Monday and Tuesday, reminding him of how good he's getting it. Absenceofsex makes the cockheart grow fonder and all that.
"You follow me step by step, almost touching
Even if I tell you to leave, you probably won't
If today passes, there won't be another chance
If you lose me in this moment Bye bye bye"
Okay, seriously, if I was the dude referenced here I'd dump that chick like day-old oyster. The "come here go away" routine is super annoying, not to mention a girl that would indulge such a creepy stalker in the first place has to have issues.
"You sneak glances at me and smile
Watching you, I smile as well
Feels good, like walking on clouds
Oh this feeling must be love You're my destiny"
See, look how much better she acts after a good smack!
"Monday I'm sorry but I'm going to tease you a little bit
Tuesday You're going to fall even deeper into me
For the remaining time I'll give you the love inside of me
Try to hold me, soft like cotton candy
I think I've waited a long time for you as well"
You purposely take a long-term teasing strategy and prevent any tight embraces and yet YOU are the one feeling neglected?
"Although you may not know it now, your heart wants me too
Before a week passes, I'm going to steal your heart
So don't try to escape from the sweet temptation"
Umm, ooooookaaaaay, so you've completely forgotten that the dude is a creepy stalker and that you've been all teasing on him all this time? On the up side, looks like the dude is finally gonna get some.
"Monday I'm going to go carefully to you too
Tuesday I'm going to love you like a pure child
For the rest of the five days, I'm going to whisper in your heart
Try to hold me, soft like cotton candy"
HOSHIT JACKPOT! Psh, we all know "love you like a pure child" is just a re-phrasing of "Like a Virgin", amirite?
Except, fuck, only for two days. AHAHAHAHA the teasing continues.
"Monday I'm sorry but I'm going to tease you a little bit
Tuesday You're going to fall even deeper into me
For the remaining 5 days, I'll give you the love inside of me
Try to hold me, soft like cotton candy
Monday I'm going to go carefully to you too
Tuesday I'm going to love you like a pure child
For the remaining 5 days, I will whisper my love"
Cocktease. At least in the dirty interpretation the dude gets sum lovin' for 7 days straight this time period. Still looks like dom!shidae ain't allowing him to hold them any more than the handcuffs will allow him to reachnon-gently.
"Sunday and then Monday the two of us will be together"
And in the cleanest interpretation of this song, the guy will FINALLY get some for at least two days after waiting five weeks. Was it worth it?
...I still foresee further teasing in the future.