You little RAT!!!!!!!!!!
Have you ever wanted to ask someone, "Are you an idiot?! Really?
Seriously now, did you think you could pay $120 less on your rent check last month and no one would notice? That the leasing office wouldn't be just slightly pissed? That your roommates wouldn't find both letters and a final notice of eviction and not figure out something went wrong here? Did you really think you could call their bluff and they were just kidding with all their talk of 'Section 37.9 of the Rent Ordinance' and 'hereby elects to declare a forfeiture of your rental agreement' and '48 hour notice?' Does it sound like a joke to you? A bluff maybe? Does it? Does it, brainless monkey boy??? Tell me, does it look like you have anything left there in your head when you roll your eyes way back at me?"
I could kill you, you stupid little son of a bitch! If I hadn't seen that letter, we'd all be evicted TOMORROW! This was your ONE task I put you in charge of. All the bills are in my name because you said you weren't responsible enough. Whose choice is that? You get to CHOOSE whether or not you are a responsible person. I thought you could handle that, but every month when I ask you if you've collected rent from the roommates, you say, "Why are you telling me this now?" F****** guess what?! Rent is due on the first of every month. When I lived in Indiana, it was due on the first. When I moved to the Sunset in San Francisco, it was due on the first. From all my experiences, rent is always due on the first. I'm paying the rest of your rent tomorrow, so *I* don't get evicted. You spent it on alcohol. Maybe the rest of the world is prettier then, but you're annoying as shit when you're on any kind of drug.
Then you get mad at me because I told the other roommates about the eviction notices and they wanted to speak with you. You felt singled out. You poor little lonely puppy! You wouldn't even listen to me when I said, "Hey, dumbshit? I don't think they're joking about all these notices!" I have to bring it to someone else's attention, because you just brush off everything I say like I'm just worrying too much. **** YOU! You didn't get kicked out of your house while on vacation and have to find a new roommate from across the country only to have him kick you out two weeks later on the first day of school because maybe it wasn't such a good idea to have you move in so soon after a serious break-up with an ex and then have to live on peoples' floors for a month before finding this place which was flea-ridden because of a roommate being irresponsible for her cats, flea bomb the place twice, get 2 new roommates after flea girls move out, get yelled at by roommates because of flea bombs, get a bug man, have to find new roommates, have deposit stolen from one ex-roomie to another, both get pissed at me, have to track down someone who currently lives in Switzerland who is still on the lease with nothing but a misspelled name because the leasing office is too damn stupid to properly file a roommate release form, only to find out that they want roommate release forms of every American citizen, promptly loose those and ask for more, and then your ****er ****ing dumb*** *** ******** ***hole moron of a roommate nearly gets you evicted because he's too ******* stupid to pay his ***-****ed rent and thinks no one will ever know! ***** the **** out of you! And you know what else?! I edited this entry just to add that last sentence, you stupid *****!
Seriously now, did you think you could pay $120 less on your rent check last month and no one would notice? That the leasing office wouldn't be just slightly pissed? That your roommates wouldn't find both letters and a final notice of eviction and not figure out something went wrong here? Did you really think you could call their bluff and they were just kidding with all their talk of 'Section 37.9 of the Rent Ordinance' and 'hereby elects to declare a forfeiture of your rental agreement' and '48 hour notice?' Does it sound like a joke to you? A bluff maybe? Does it? Does it, brainless monkey boy??? Tell me, does it look like you have anything left there in your head when you roll your eyes way back at me?"
I could kill you, you stupid little son of a bitch! If I hadn't seen that letter, we'd all be evicted TOMORROW! This was your ONE task I put you in charge of. All the bills are in my name because you said you weren't responsible enough. Whose choice is that? You get to CHOOSE whether or not you are a responsible person. I thought you could handle that, but every month when I ask you if you've collected rent from the roommates, you say, "Why are you telling me this now?" F****** guess what?! Rent is due on the first of every month. When I lived in Indiana, it was due on the first. When I moved to the Sunset in San Francisco, it was due on the first. From all my experiences, rent is always due on the first. I'm paying the rest of your rent tomorrow, so *I* don't get evicted. You spent it on alcohol. Maybe the rest of the world is prettier then, but you're annoying as shit when you're on any kind of drug.
Then you get mad at me because I told the other roommates about the eviction notices and they wanted to speak with you. You felt singled out. You poor little lonely puppy! You wouldn't even listen to me when I said, "Hey, dumbshit? I don't think they're joking about all these notices!" I have to bring it to someone else's attention, because you just brush off everything I say like I'm just worrying too much. **** YOU! You didn't get kicked out of your house while on vacation and have to find a new roommate from across the country only to have him kick you out two weeks later on the first day of school because maybe it wasn't such a good idea to have you move in so soon after a serious break-up with an ex and then have to live on peoples' floors for a month before finding this place which was flea-ridden because of a roommate being irresponsible for her cats, flea bomb the place twice, get 2 new roommates after flea girls move out, get yelled at by roommates because of flea bombs, get a bug man, have to find new roommates, have deposit stolen from one ex-roomie to another, both get pissed at me, have to track down someone who currently lives in Switzerland who is still on the lease with nothing but a misspelled name because the leasing office is too damn stupid to properly file a roommate release form, only to find out that they want roommate release forms of every American citizen, promptly loose those and ask for more, and then your ****er ****ing dumb*** *** ******** ***hole moron of a roommate nearly gets you evicted because he's too ******* stupid to pay his ***-****ed rent and thinks no one will ever know! ***** the **** out of you! And you know what else?! I edited this entry just to add that last sentence, you stupid *****!