A story to amaze and astound!
Ok, first off, I have to get this right, so i'll have to make a small table of contents.
1 - Ghetto Ops berthing member 1
2 - Gobm 2
3 - Gobm 3
4 - Gobm 4
Me - me obviously!
BF1 - female at table 1
BF2 - female at table 2
Ok, some back story! We are in port Cagliari Sardinia, Italy. The scene is a nice stroll (when I say stroll, I mean mountain climb) up to the local square. They have cafes everywhere. And everywhere there is a cafe, there is an ice cream shop. Well, apparently if there is a cafe, with an ice cream shop, they obviously have to serve alcohol. So me and my two liberty buddies are out and about in the city. I decide I want a coffee, well, and espresso, which they call a cafe. So we stop and sit down. About 10 minutes later, four females sit down at the table next to us. They are all talking low and just keeping to themselves. No big deal. My back is to them, so I pay them no mind. Enter the entertainment of the day. The Ghetto Ops Berthing Crew. And here, is where the wonderment of my day began.
1 - "Yo main...hook a brutha up wit some Hennessy yo!"
2 - "Man, you whack negro, they aint gonna be havin no Hennessy in this dump."
(Ironic that they call this place a dump when they live on board...)
1 - "Come on main, I be needin some drizank. Get me some Hennessy yo!"
3 - "Dude, he already done told you they ain't gonna have none."
Me - "Well, have you asked them if they have Cognac? I'm sure they do, just probably not Hennessy..."
4 - "Damn Morris, you a smart mutha fucka. I just saw a bottle of that shit in there."
Me - "Hey, glad I can help."
(My cafe shows up, I say thank you to the waiter, and stir in the sugar.)
1 - "Excuse me cuz, can I get some Cognac? And some brews for my bruthas."
4 - "I want some Con too yo!"
2 - "Negro, I said I'd buy this mutha fucka some dranks, not you,ya broke ass bitch."
3 - "Dude! That bitch aint wearin no damn bra! She gots nice nips yo."
1 - "Just bite em!"
2 - The bangin bitch next to her aint wearin...oh she gotta thong on yo. I bet she be a straight trip in the hizzy."
(At this point, I feel a chair bang into mine, as one of the females adjusts her chair. I had to steal a glance by this time, based off of the morons talking...I knew they had to be talking about the four girls behind me. They are decent looking, nothing drop dead model like, but ok for the ghetto boys I suppose. I notice at this time, they are all sitting a little closer together now.)
1 - "Hey baby, you want some black man?"
(I take a sip from my cafe.)
4 - "I'd wreck that little bitch all night."
3 - "Maybe after I did my brutha, after me."
1 - "Main, you dudes be whack...aint no fine ass bitch like her goin down on yo black ass."
4 - "You trippin! She be lookin at me from over there right now."
2 - "Word!"
(I take another sip.)
1 - "I just wanna pull that bitch thong off with my teeth, then bend that bitch over."
(I drink the last of my cafe, it hangs there for a minute, it's the last drink.)
**DISCLAIMER**
BF1 and BF2 are now known to all in the audience. As they were getting up to leave. The whole table of them. All four. Laughing. Then they spoke.
BF1 - "I wonder if we should tell them we are British and understood everything they were saying?"
BF2 - "Wankers..."
Me - *choke cough gag*
Espresso burns when it comes out your nose...
1 - Ghetto Ops berthing member 1
2 - Gobm 2
3 - Gobm 3
4 - Gobm 4
Me - me obviously!
BF1 - female at table 1
BF2 - female at table 2
Ok, some back story! We are in port Cagliari Sardinia, Italy. The scene is a nice stroll (when I say stroll, I mean mountain climb) up to the local square. They have cafes everywhere. And everywhere there is a cafe, there is an ice cream shop. Well, apparently if there is a cafe, with an ice cream shop, they obviously have to serve alcohol. So me and my two liberty buddies are out and about in the city. I decide I want a coffee, well, and espresso, which they call a cafe. So we stop and sit down. About 10 minutes later, four females sit down at the table next to us. They are all talking low and just keeping to themselves. No big deal. My back is to them, so I pay them no mind. Enter the entertainment of the day. The Ghetto Ops Berthing Crew. And here, is where the wonderment of my day began.
1 - "Yo main...hook a brutha up wit some Hennessy yo!"
2 - "Man, you whack negro, they aint gonna be havin no Hennessy in this dump."
(Ironic that they call this place a dump when they live on board...)
1 - "Come on main, I be needin some drizank. Get me some Hennessy yo!"
3 - "Dude, he already done told you they ain't gonna have none."
Me - "Well, have you asked them if they have Cognac? I'm sure they do, just probably not Hennessy..."
4 - "Damn Morris, you a smart mutha fucka. I just saw a bottle of that shit in there."
Me - "Hey, glad I can help."
(My cafe shows up, I say thank you to the waiter, and stir in the sugar.)
1 - "Excuse me cuz, can I get some Cognac? And some brews for my bruthas."
4 - "I want some Con too yo!"
2 - "Negro, I said I'd buy this mutha fucka some dranks, not you,ya broke ass bitch."
3 - "Dude! That bitch aint wearin no damn bra! She gots nice nips yo."
1 - "Just bite em!"
2 - The bangin bitch next to her aint wearin...oh she gotta thong on yo. I bet she be a straight trip in the hizzy."
(At this point, I feel a chair bang into mine, as one of the females adjusts her chair. I had to steal a glance by this time, based off of the morons talking...I knew they had to be talking about the four girls behind me. They are decent looking, nothing drop dead model like, but ok for the ghetto boys I suppose. I notice at this time, they are all sitting a little closer together now.)
1 - "Hey baby, you want some black man?"
(I take a sip from my cafe.)
4 - "I'd wreck that little bitch all night."
3 - "Maybe after I did my brutha, after me."
1 - "Main, you dudes be whack...aint no fine ass bitch like her goin down on yo black ass."
4 - "You trippin! She be lookin at me from over there right now."
2 - "Word!"
(I take another sip.)
1 - "I just wanna pull that bitch thong off with my teeth, then bend that bitch over."
(I drink the last of my cafe, it hangs there for a minute, it's the last drink.)
**DISCLAIMER**
BF1 and BF2 are now known to all in the audience. As they were getting up to leave. The whole table of them. All four. Laughing. Then they spoke.
BF1 - "I wonder if we should tell them we are British and understood everything they were saying?"
BF2 - "Wankers..."
Me - *choke cough gag*
Espresso burns when it comes out your nose...