Overcome
Overcome_Better than Ezra
I fell in too deep
But I learned to swim
In an undertow
I sense I'm giving in
I feel strange
I feel changed
I feel strange
Overcome
Overcome
I'm a little bit wiser
I'm a little bit sadder
I'm a little bit less you might have guessed
But if you could be staying
Tell me now darling I think I'm fading
I swear I'll never trade your life for a lie
The above is a song a came across last night exactly at the same time as I finished the entry before, literally the same second it was fate. (Gotta love random I tunes shuffle). It’s currently my new theme song so of course it needed to be properly documented. :)
No, no not to worry there is a real point to this entry. I realized through all the comments everyone left me why I always used to love live journal so much, you can be as open and honest as you want and people seem to feel you. Its literally like being in another persons shoes for a moment. Sometimes that’s what you need another perspective. After talking to many of you whom I really haven’t had any contact with in a long long time I would just like to thank you guys for still having that input in my life, it really means a lot to me, especially at times like these when everything seems absolutely chaotic. Especially when you consider that girls can be very emotional creatures who are not always capable of processing the events of their own lives as well as those of the people around them ::very very large hug:: You have nooooooo idea how your comments absolutely made my day and made everything a little bit easier
Ive decided that the rest of the summer is going to be a growing journey for me, but instead of just letting it all fly by like im prone to do I think I am going to take advantage of the fact that I do have a place just to say whatever I want.
Since about the middle of May, 6ish weeks ago or so, my roommate and I began a kick where we decided we wanted to become better people. Healthy; emotionally and physically, I wont lie, this process has been discouraging on its own at times too, I mean it is wicked easy to gain weight…but anyone who says you can lose 10lbs fast…they are telling lies! I personally went from being a very lethargic moping sloth, to going to the gym basically every day for 2 hours. (30-45 minutes of cardio, then strength training). Honestly that part wasn’t the hard part, the hardest part was knowing that I was on a healthy non crash diet (woo! a first for me) and daily exercise and I wasn’t losing any weight…I know I know muscle, but its still rough when you want to see the number go down. Anyway so finallllly after weeks of nothing, I’m finally starting to see a more visible difference. Toneness…wooah. Little pants that aren’t soo little anymore… I haven’t even really lost that much still poundage wise, but I am amazed at how just simple exercising can reshape your body. I'm about to where I was size wise my senior year…which is crazy because in my head and when I look in the mirror I still see someone a lot bigger, but clothes tell me otherwise so its all perspective I suppose.
I’m becoming a better me. I think that means I should also start looking into going back to church, I'm not sure which church or which group to go to at the moment. I'm worried that even though they are supposed to welcome everyone with open arms….that the judgmental eye will be too much for me. I'm afraid to go back to the BCM because I fell off the face of the earth for an entire year…literally and in that time changed sooooo much from the girl who started going there as a freshman in college. I know, I shouldn’t be concerned with that, but so much of who I am and who I've always been is affected by the way that other people view me and the expectations that are placed me.
I need to go get some sleep right now, I realize I just ended that abruptly, but I I left the computer and came back and lost my place.
Sara
I fell in too deep
But I learned to swim
In an undertow
I sense I'm giving in
I feel strange
I feel changed
I feel strange
Overcome
Overcome
I'm a little bit wiser
I'm a little bit sadder
I'm a little bit less you might have guessed
But if you could be staying
Tell me now darling I think I'm fading
I swear I'll never trade your life for a lie
The above is a song a came across last night exactly at the same time as I finished the entry before, literally the same second it was fate. (Gotta love random I tunes shuffle). It’s currently my new theme song so of course it needed to be properly documented. :)
No, no not to worry there is a real point to this entry. I realized through all the comments everyone left me why I always used to love live journal so much, you can be as open and honest as you want and people seem to feel you. Its literally like being in another persons shoes for a moment. Sometimes that’s what you need another perspective. After talking to many of you whom I really haven’t had any contact with in a long long time I would just like to thank you guys for still having that input in my life, it really means a lot to me, especially at times like these when everything seems absolutely chaotic. Especially when you consider that girls can be very emotional creatures who are not always capable of processing the events of their own lives as well as those of the people around them ::very very large hug:: You have nooooooo idea how your comments absolutely made my day and made everything a little bit easier
Ive decided that the rest of the summer is going to be a growing journey for me, but instead of just letting it all fly by like im prone to do I think I am going to take advantage of the fact that I do have a place just to say whatever I want.
Since about the middle of May, 6ish weeks ago or so, my roommate and I began a kick where we decided we wanted to become better people. Healthy; emotionally and physically, I wont lie, this process has been discouraging on its own at times too, I mean it is wicked easy to gain weight…but anyone who says you can lose 10lbs fast…they are telling lies! I personally went from being a very lethargic moping sloth, to going to the gym basically every day for 2 hours. (30-45 minutes of cardio, then strength training). Honestly that part wasn’t the hard part, the hardest part was knowing that I was on a healthy non crash diet (woo! a first for me) and daily exercise and I wasn’t losing any weight…I know I know muscle, but its still rough when you want to see the number go down. Anyway so finallllly after weeks of nothing, I’m finally starting to see a more visible difference. Toneness…wooah. Little pants that aren’t soo little anymore… I haven’t even really lost that much still poundage wise, but I am amazed at how just simple exercising can reshape your body. I'm about to where I was size wise my senior year…which is crazy because in my head and when I look in the mirror I still see someone a lot bigger, but clothes tell me otherwise so its all perspective I suppose.
I’m becoming a better me. I think that means I should also start looking into going back to church, I'm not sure which church or which group to go to at the moment. I'm worried that even though they are supposed to welcome everyone with open arms….that the judgmental eye will be too much for me. I'm afraid to go back to the BCM because I fell off the face of the earth for an entire year…literally and in that time changed sooooo much from the girl who started going there as a freshman in college. I know, I shouldn’t be concerned with that, but so much of who I am and who I've always been is affected by the way that other people view me and the expectations that are placed me.
I need to go get some sleep right now, I realize I just ended that abruptly, but I I left the computer and came back and lost my place.
Sara