(Untitled)

[pedaltothemetal]

Who: Four space cops very upstanding and not suspicious at all representatives of the Galactic Federation purveyors of fine caffeinated drinks. Also, YOU.
What: So there's this coffee shop, right.
When: ALL WEEK. From Tuesday, March 8th, to the end of the AU event.
Where: A totally unassuming and absolutely not-a-front-for-Galactic Federation-

Comments

SPACE COPS ASSEMBLE

[pedaltothemetal]

Orders are orders, man. And you all got orders to get your collective butts down to THE NEW ASSIGNMENT.

It's a coffee shop.

TO THE SPACECAVE

[betterthanawiki]

Things that were clearly more important than sensitive undercover operations: visiting a bus that sold coffee, apparently. As a good, obedient member of Internova, Uxie certainly wasn't going to disobey an order from a superior officer.

That, however, wouldn't stop him from finding said order perhaps a little silly. He hoped this wouldn't take long. He stepped inside, casting a disinterested eye over the cozy little interior. Oh. A pleasant little coffee shop. How cute.

"I certainly hope our assignment doesn't involve donuts, too."

[colonel_falcon]

Of course it involved doughnuts. What kind of self-respecting coffee shop would they be if they didn't have doughnuts.

Falcon may have been eating a doughnut when Uxie arrived.

"This is our new base of operations."

[n_objections]

Did someone say cop doughnuts.

You know what they say about misery. Samus entered the establishment as requested, not extremely late but trailing behind the other blonde. She could have sworn she heard that voice before...

Everything was getting an incredulous look, especially Falcon.

"A... coffee shop?"

[colonel_falcon]

Falcon tossed a bundle of clothing (apron and bowtie included) at Samus.

"Welcome to hell your new after school job." He said through a mouthful of doughnut.

[n_objections]

She caught the clothes and it did not quite register right away until she held it out in front of her, it unfolding beautifully under her hands in all it's apron and bowtie glory.

She balled it up and THREW IT BACK as if it were ON FIRE.

"What?! No way! You want me to sit here and serve coffee?"

WHAT ABOUT. THE ACTION.

[colonel_falcon]

Upon having the clothes flung back at him, he calmly gathered them back up into a bundle and walked right up to Samus, shoving it into her arms.

"Consider it an undercover operation."

[betterthanawiki]

"Ah. Well, have fun with that, Lieutenant."

And Uxie smoothly turned to leave.

[colonel_falcon]

Uxie was smoothly met with a similar pile of clothes.

Shoved into his face.

"Jess why are you always late to everything--" LOOK JUST

[officer_hyde]

Hey check out who's already eying the donuts-- WAIT I MEAN

Kyle stared at the uniform (mostly the bowtie) as Samus unfurled it. And then stared at Falcon like he had bugs crawling out of his ears. And then at the bus they were all standing in.

"I ain't wearing a bowtie."

[colonel_falcon]

Falcon shoved the rest of the doughnut in his mouth. It was so delicious.

"Yes you are." He said, although it sounded more like 'yeff you arr', because of the doughnut. Then Kyle was presented with a uniform of his own while Falcon swallowed said baked good. "It's an order."

[betterthanawiki]

"An order? Frankly, sir, that's absurd. Attempting to maintain a low profile is appreciated, but ordering us to join you in a game of dress-up is making a mockery of our profession. We'll have nothing to do with this."

He said that as if he really did believe he wasn't going to be cleaning the bathroom within the next fifteen minutes or so.

[colonel_falcon]

Okay. Uxie caught him. The uniforms were expressly to make them miserable.

"Just for that," he said, jabbing a finger at Uxie and helping himself to another doughnut, "you've got bathroom duty."

[n_objections]

Samus felt no remorse for snickering in Uxie's general direction.

[betterthanawiki]

Don't think he didn't notice that, Samus. One of these days you're gonna put a lasagna in the oven and conveniently forget about it until the smoke alarm goes off. JUST YOU WAIT.

"And of course, the nonhuman gets all the dirty work. I hope we're at least getting free coffee out of this." Stupid karma. Stupid boss. To think, he could be snoozing at the bottom of a frigid cold lake and/or be getting kidnapped by terrorists instead of this.

[colonel_falcon]

"No, the one who mouths off gets the dirty work."

But he held a doughnut in Uxie's direction anyway.

Take it, Uxie.

It is for you.