BORED OUTTA MY MIND HERE
alright, so... im bored yes me the boy who almost always has SOMETHING to do for either art or a class... SHIT i could do a peice for art but then again i really am to lazy to drag out my paints at this time of night.
So ive discovered the fact that i want a boy well not just any boy but most preferibly ashton a boy from the naugy studio. hes SO HOT a bit younger but that alright. he sooo straight and confused. but that cool. i miss all those ppl that was a fun nighht that i really cant divolge into cause what happens at krate events stays at karate events.
i think im wierd cause i always have a glass of milk before bed. it calms me down. im worried about ben, he seems to be falling off the edge and i really dont want that cause he means alot to me. Im sorta surprised im not on something right now its a friday night i really should have some narcotic in my system that numbs me. i want to move to woodbury gardens because everyone of my friends is out that way and most of my life is out there. THEN AGAIN THERE ARE NO GAY BOYS OUT THERE. i swear our school needs more open gay boys at it then just me and pat i swear and if there are gay boys i need to meet them cause even friends are cool. its like it just gives u someone to talk to. ARG my bird is being stupid. im still really bored.
i need smokes but noone seems to have them or want to buy them for me. I think next trip to hartford i might ask some hot random college boy to buy me a pack, but then again if mrs D( D monster) finds out shed fucking ripp my balls off with a blunt knife.
i really dont want midterms to come cause that means that the years sorta like half over and that sorta sucks because like that means summers coming and that means i dont have all my hours for ag yet, but on the plus side only one more year till im outta highschool and done with most of these assholes that choose to call themselves humanbeings.
im really sorta nervouse about the whole musical thing cause idk everyone said i did good but idk im just really scared and stuff. like even if i dont make it i did try and that all i could do, RIGHT. im not even sure of that anymore. im just in one of those moods.
i really think its funny that my dog snores shes like in a dead comma and shes fucking snoring... wow dogs and thier masters realy are alike in certain ways cause i was told i snore. hmm
so december 30th im going to NY with Ag to see some garden and ashia will b there. that situation is sorta really fucked up because idk where im gonna go with it. on one hand shes stable and i guess a good thing to fall back on but then again i dont want to use her in that way cause i think that would hurt her. so i think its best if we dont get into anything to major right now this way nothing can get fucked up like past experiances.
ARG bens killing me slowly i swear it pains me to see him falling and shit. hes such a confused little boy. its really sorta sad that some ppl cant figure out that they are gay bi or straight. i guess its been so long for me i mean i sorta went threw it all in 8th grade so i didnt need to worry about it and the feelings till then and like in 8th grade noone really relizes ur staring at thier crotch or the buldge they happen to have or the fact that they are dirrpp0ing dreams of boyhood to an 8th grade confused little boy. wow flash back there. hmm
o well i think im accualy sleepy without any drugs OMG
spenser
So ive discovered the fact that i want a boy well not just any boy but most preferibly ashton a boy from the naugy studio. hes SO HOT a bit younger but that alright. he sooo straight and confused. but that cool. i miss all those ppl that was a fun nighht that i really cant divolge into cause what happens at krate events stays at karate events.
i think im wierd cause i always have a glass of milk before bed. it calms me down. im worried about ben, he seems to be falling off the edge and i really dont want that cause he means alot to me. Im sorta surprised im not on something right now its a friday night i really should have some narcotic in my system that numbs me. i want to move to woodbury gardens because everyone of my friends is out that way and most of my life is out there. THEN AGAIN THERE ARE NO GAY BOYS OUT THERE. i swear our school needs more open gay boys at it then just me and pat i swear and if there are gay boys i need to meet them cause even friends are cool. its like it just gives u someone to talk to. ARG my bird is being stupid. im still really bored.
i need smokes but noone seems to have them or want to buy them for me. I think next trip to hartford i might ask some hot random college boy to buy me a pack, but then again if mrs D( D monster) finds out shed fucking ripp my balls off with a blunt knife.
i really dont want midterms to come cause that means that the years sorta like half over and that sorta sucks because like that means summers coming and that means i dont have all my hours for ag yet, but on the plus side only one more year till im outta highschool and done with most of these assholes that choose to call themselves humanbeings.
im really sorta nervouse about the whole musical thing cause idk everyone said i did good but idk im just really scared and stuff. like even if i dont make it i did try and that all i could do, RIGHT. im not even sure of that anymore. im just in one of those moods.
i really think its funny that my dog snores shes like in a dead comma and shes fucking snoring... wow dogs and thier masters realy are alike in certain ways cause i was told i snore. hmm
so december 30th im going to NY with Ag to see some garden and ashia will b there. that situation is sorta really fucked up because idk where im gonna go with it. on one hand shes stable and i guess a good thing to fall back on but then again i dont want to use her in that way cause i think that would hurt her. so i think its best if we dont get into anything to major right now this way nothing can get fucked up like past experiances.
ARG bens killing me slowly i swear it pains me to see him falling and shit. hes such a confused little boy. its really sorta sad that some ppl cant figure out that they are gay bi or straight. i guess its been so long for me i mean i sorta went threw it all in 8th grade so i didnt need to worry about it and the feelings till then and like in 8th grade noone really relizes ur staring at thier crotch or the buldge they happen to have or the fact that they are dirrpp0ing dreams of boyhood to an 8th grade confused little boy. wow flash back there. hmm
o well i think im accualy sleepy without any drugs OMG
spenser