this is the first time i havent wanted something else to want

[smallwhitebike]

so its a week today and im happy as fuck. maybe i should be shot for being so happy and disconcerned with everyone else, but its good to feel this way. im usually so wrapped up in feeling like shit and being so god damned lonely that i dont notice the beauty things all around me everywhere, everyday. but nothing bothers me anymore. its me and my thoughts all day, and its perfect. i watched clayton sleep today and i took pictures of him. hes the most beautiful little 2 year old in the world and he makes me so happy. having someone so small and innocent and impressionable makes me want to be a better person and show him the world in all its beauty. i used to think id never ever want to have children because why would anyone have to be brought into such a harsh and cold world? where is the point in that. but i have this disgusting renewed sense of perfection. its like everything is falling into place and im right there, finally getting it good. enough of this...

...today britt, me and mohawk boy went to the mall. i now have a very nice list of kissing locations. i got two really cute skirts, and im thrilled about it. its so lame but i love skirts, i guess now that im comfortable wearing them i dont ever want to wear anything else. but whatever, i really have nothing else to say. but i had a great day, and really a great week. it feels like its been months, but it doesnt matter. nothing does when things are this great.

i love this.

::sarah::