poor baby!
it's been about 600 days since i had this livejournal.
i don't feel like working on english right now so i thought i could update my livejournal.
so basically....life sucks. yeah.
school wants me to die.
i have SATs coming up, along with AP Exams.
i don't feel like doing the things i use to like to do.
i don't have free time.
i haven't gotten enough sleep and it's affecting more than ever.
i don't have energy for anything.
i want to be alone more.
people are bugging more than ever.
i have barely any money and need it for different things.
i dont feel like looking pretty or sexy or whatever anymore.
ok those were the negatives...which have been really taking over my life. but there are a few positives.
i enjoy swimming more and doing better.
playing the sax in jazz has been putting me in a good mood.
prom is getting me excited.
band trip is in less then 2 weeks.
i have relatives from out of town here!
i like being alone more.
i'm reading more.
that's it. i'm not happy anymore, but i'm surviving. as much as i say i want to pull my hair out, i'm either too lazy, too tired, ir know better not to. i'm not happy, but i'm grateful basically. which is better than just hating myself all together.
i'm just waiting for summer. but i know even then i'll be busy. i'm going to find a job, take psych at skyline (hopefully), get my license (maybe before summer), and my sister and i are trying to plan a vacation together. plus, iwant t ogo to so cal to look at colleges. yeah, where's the sleeping in? the chilling with friends? not there. and i bet my parents are gonna be like how they were last year...constantly bugging me to not relax to stop hanging out with my friends and do useless work and maybe i don't know, have no life.
i hear life gets worse.
i'm just wondering, if all i am doing is worth it? because, of what i have been seeing and experiencing, it doesn't seem to or will become better in the long run.
i need someone to convince me otherwise with hard facts! not just a bunch of bullshit. i need someone to write me a history essay without the non-factual intro and conclusion. i need the body with hard facts. cause until then, i'm still going to think the same thing.
i tried, it just didn't work.
sorry for the non-positivity.....please don't hate me for saying how i feel. cause if you start complaining about how unhappy people are, then you are just a hypocrite. and you know it.
adios!!
-hanya
i don't feel like working on english right now so i thought i could update my livejournal.
so basically....life sucks. yeah.
school wants me to die.
i have SATs coming up, along with AP Exams.
i don't feel like doing the things i use to like to do.
i don't have free time.
i haven't gotten enough sleep and it's affecting more than ever.
i don't have energy for anything.
i want to be alone more.
people are bugging more than ever.
i have barely any money and need it for different things.
i dont feel like looking pretty or sexy or whatever anymore.
ok those were the negatives...which have been really taking over my life. but there are a few positives.
i enjoy swimming more and doing better.
playing the sax in jazz has been putting me in a good mood.
prom is getting me excited.
band trip is in less then 2 weeks.
i have relatives from out of town here!
i like being alone more.
i'm reading more.
that's it. i'm not happy anymore, but i'm surviving. as much as i say i want to pull my hair out, i'm either too lazy, too tired, ir know better not to. i'm not happy, but i'm grateful basically. which is better than just hating myself all together.
i'm just waiting for summer. but i know even then i'll be busy. i'm going to find a job, take psych at skyline (hopefully), get my license (maybe before summer), and my sister and i are trying to plan a vacation together. plus, iwant t ogo to so cal to look at colleges. yeah, where's the sleeping in? the chilling with friends? not there. and i bet my parents are gonna be like how they were last year...constantly bugging me to not relax to stop hanging out with my friends and do useless work and maybe i don't know, have no life.
i hear life gets worse.
i'm just wondering, if all i am doing is worth it? because, of what i have been seeing and experiencing, it doesn't seem to or will become better in the long run.
i need someone to convince me otherwise with hard facts! not just a bunch of bullshit. i need someone to write me a history essay without the non-factual intro and conclusion. i need the body with hard facts. cause until then, i'm still going to think the same thing.
i tried, it just didn't work.
sorry for the non-positivity.....please don't hate me for saying how i feel. cause if you start complaining about how unhappy people are, then you are just a hypocrite. and you know it.
adios!!
-hanya