(no subject)
It's crazy. I have been out in LA for the summer with plenty of things going on. I wish I had written about my thoughts on them when they were fresh in my head. But I didn't. So I won't. But the point is that there is something going on right now that I can't seem to cure with time and I feel like this may be a possible solution. Whenever you bitch abotu somethng, and know that some people might hear or read it and respond, it always makes you feel a little better. And I don't think its so much about people giving advice or giving a lendign ear for me to vent. It's about having people to witness my life. To witness my existence. I really think that's the whole issue with fame. It's the ultimate human goal. To have people witness our lives and know we exist. For some ridiculous reason, I feel like a lot of people don't feel complete unless numerous third party members are aware of their lives.
Unfortunately, I have to admit that these thoughts started after being unable to look away from the Jennifer Lopez dance piece "Shall We Dance." As embarassing as this might be, I have to take a moment to talk abouta part in the movie where susan sarandon who plays richard gere's wife explains why she puts up with her estranged marriage. The direct quote is:
"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."
And then I realized, oh my god, that's what I want. Screw this love crap, screw being meant for someone. God is dead, the world is empty, and fate is a shakespearian fantasy. But susan sarandon, i think you might be on to something. I mean, its a very selfish concept, but it really is the only explanation i've heard in a long time that makes any sense. I want to have someone who will care about everything I do and help me feel more....here.
I dont' know if I've accomplished anything here. But sometimes just a stream of conscious rambling is a good solution to any bad day.
Unfortunately, I have to admit that these thoughts started after being unable to look away from the Jennifer Lopez dance piece "Shall We Dance." As embarassing as this might be, I have to take a moment to talk abouta part in the movie where susan sarandon who plays richard gere's wife explains why she puts up with her estranged marriage. The direct quote is:
"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."
And then I realized, oh my god, that's what I want. Screw this love crap, screw being meant for someone. God is dead, the world is empty, and fate is a shakespearian fantasy. But susan sarandon, i think you might be on to something. I mean, its a very selfish concept, but it really is the only explanation i've heard in a long time that makes any sense. I want to have someone who will care about everything I do and help me feel more....here.
I dont' know if I've accomplished anything here. But sometimes just a stream of conscious rambling is a good solution to any bad day.