Drink Outside the Box
Well the night started out as any other. After showering and getting dressed I began the 3 D's of planning a night with my friends: Discussions of what to do, Indecision of where to go, and Delays of actually doing it.
Anyway, we ended up at this girls house playing catch phrase and drinking plenty of refreshing boxed wine chilled just above a perfect lukewarm. We end up getting not only smashed but a little bored with the night that had surprisingly entertained us for as long as it did. So we go to jillians which brought on a sort of childlike excitment in me. I'm not sure if its because of my anticipation to play the video games or because I really have never been there past 10 since you've always had to be 21 to get in. So the point is that I had some big expectations of the night to come. However I had no idea what I was in for, nor did Jillians...the bitch.
We end up getting there after 1, which gives us less than an hour before they close. When I get to the door the guy cards me and then asks for a $5 cover charge. Now many may not know, but drunk and angry are two of my worst qualities to combine. I'm like that bomb in Die Hard 3. So this is the first of my series of breakdowns at jillians. I flip on this guy, which is not a good idea because he is a really scary alliteration....you know, a big black bald bouncer. I start screamin that there's only 40 minutes left and I shouldn't be paying the same as people who showed up 4 hours ago. The guy grabs me and tells me to chill out or he'll kick my ass so i fork up the 5 bucks and head straight for the bar, fuck the video games.
I get up to the bartender and ask for a rum and coke. Like some fucking 8th grade science project, the bartender pulls out one shot glass and begins measuring the shot of rum she is putting in my glass. THen measuring the coke also. But not before she makes sure that it is physically impossible to fit another piece of ice into that god damn glass. I'm pissed and I say, somethin like, "you guys runnin low on rum or somethin?" she shoots me a look and I hand her my credit card and ask to open a tab.
"This is last call," she says.
"What the fuck?!!" (Enter my second tantrum for the night.)
I begin to berate this woman about the liquor business as if I have any idea how its run. I start tellin her you can't turn a profit when last call is 30 minutes before the place is shut down. She tells me that's the rule so I say well then why don't you give me another rum snowcone while you're at it. She did not like that one. In fact, she did just that. I mean this woman was pounding ice into my glass. Other than the ice tray in my freezer, I've never seen so many ice cubes in one place at one time. SHe gave me my dash of rum and sent me on my way. After bitching about how much I hated the place to my friends, we decide to get a $5 card to play video games. When I see you get 3,000 credit points with $5 I realize that they are charging covers and holding back on liquor because they really give it all away with teh video games....oh man was i wrong.
I get to one of those shooter games wehre you step on the peddle to hide behind shit and see that the game costs 1000 points. 1000 POINTS!! I don't care if its points, dollars, or pieces of shit out of my ass, I do not give away a thousand of anything for a video game. Well...I mean I did, but I WON't again. So later on, I'm playin this pinball machine that costs, i dunno like 2500 points a ball when all the games in the place turn off. I was sooo pissed. I threw such a fit that the manager came over with a free card filled with $10 towards video games just to get me out of there.
And that was basically the last I remember of the night. Everything else is a blur of eating, screaming, more wine, and harold and kumar.
Anyway, we ended up at this girls house playing catch phrase and drinking plenty of refreshing boxed wine chilled just above a perfect lukewarm. We end up getting not only smashed but a little bored with the night that had surprisingly entertained us for as long as it did. So we go to jillians which brought on a sort of childlike excitment in me. I'm not sure if its because of my anticipation to play the video games or because I really have never been there past 10 since you've always had to be 21 to get in. So the point is that I had some big expectations of the night to come. However I had no idea what I was in for, nor did Jillians...the bitch.
We end up getting there after 1, which gives us less than an hour before they close. When I get to the door the guy cards me and then asks for a $5 cover charge. Now many may not know, but drunk and angry are two of my worst qualities to combine. I'm like that bomb in Die Hard 3. So this is the first of my series of breakdowns at jillians. I flip on this guy, which is not a good idea because he is a really scary alliteration....you know, a big black bald bouncer. I start screamin that there's only 40 minutes left and I shouldn't be paying the same as people who showed up 4 hours ago. The guy grabs me and tells me to chill out or he'll kick my ass so i fork up the 5 bucks and head straight for the bar, fuck the video games.
I get up to the bartender and ask for a rum and coke. Like some fucking 8th grade science project, the bartender pulls out one shot glass and begins measuring the shot of rum she is putting in my glass. THen measuring the coke also. But not before she makes sure that it is physically impossible to fit another piece of ice into that god damn glass. I'm pissed and I say, somethin like, "you guys runnin low on rum or somethin?" she shoots me a look and I hand her my credit card and ask to open a tab.
"This is last call," she says.
"What the fuck?!!" (Enter my second tantrum for the night.)
I begin to berate this woman about the liquor business as if I have any idea how its run. I start tellin her you can't turn a profit when last call is 30 minutes before the place is shut down. She tells me that's the rule so I say well then why don't you give me another rum snowcone while you're at it. She did not like that one. In fact, she did just that. I mean this woman was pounding ice into my glass. Other than the ice tray in my freezer, I've never seen so many ice cubes in one place at one time. SHe gave me my dash of rum and sent me on my way. After bitching about how much I hated the place to my friends, we decide to get a $5 card to play video games. When I see you get 3,000 credit points with $5 I realize that they are charging covers and holding back on liquor because they really give it all away with teh video games....oh man was i wrong.
I get to one of those shooter games wehre you step on the peddle to hide behind shit and see that the game costs 1000 points. 1000 POINTS!! I don't care if its points, dollars, or pieces of shit out of my ass, I do not give away a thousand of anything for a video game. Well...I mean I did, but I WON't again. So later on, I'm playin this pinball machine that costs, i dunno like 2500 points a ball when all the games in the place turn off. I was sooo pissed. I threw such a fit that the manager came over with a free card filled with $10 towards video games just to get me out of there.
And that was basically the last I remember of the night. Everything else is a blur of eating, screaming, more wine, and harold and kumar.