Goodbye Killeen... Hello Reality.
so it's spring break. haven't really done much of anything. that includes my homework. guess i should get that done... hmm..
i've got another person living in my house. cristina. very good friend of mine. long story. but she's here. and we're basically having alot of fun. it couldn't be better. except that we both barely ever have any money and when we do, it goes to gas. boo... gas has gotten so expensive. and it's not going anywhere but up for the next few months. i hate that.
becca came back to town. the first few days were fine. but it's bad to say, but i'm kinda glad she went away. it sounds so mean, but it's true. she gets so unfocused and that has a tendency to rub off on people, even me. and she's not coming back this summer. that's what i'm not happy about. (i try to support her, but I don't want her falling into the same life I did, and the choices I made, and now the consequences I have to face.) She's going to live with three boys, which (one she likes). that's a bad idea all together, and she thinks its fine because they help her stay focused. uhmm ya!! if all you focus on, is, them.
but enough of that. got to see my nephew yesterday on webcam. and erin, and joe for a few minutes. but mostly anthony. he's gotten so big!!
life has been pretty hectic lately. i thought it would slow down after i created hell for this boy. but it hasn't. i'm not really used to thinking that i'm going to be a mom soon either. i don't want to grow up so fast. i have my whole life ahead of me, and he just left me here...
cristina was telling me that you don't just stop loving somebody overnight. But the thing is, I miss Killeen so much, I would give anything to be able to go back. It was my escape. And now, there's nothing left for me there, except pain. So I'm not sure why I still miss it like I do, but I would give anything... to feel whole again...
i've got another person living in my house. cristina. very good friend of mine. long story. but she's here. and we're basically having alot of fun. it couldn't be better. except that we both barely ever have any money and when we do, it goes to gas. boo... gas has gotten so expensive. and it's not going anywhere but up for the next few months. i hate that.
becca came back to town. the first few days were fine. but it's bad to say, but i'm kinda glad she went away. it sounds so mean, but it's true. she gets so unfocused and that has a tendency to rub off on people, even me. and she's not coming back this summer. that's what i'm not happy about. (i try to support her, but I don't want her falling into the same life I did, and the choices I made, and now the consequences I have to face.) She's going to live with three boys, which (one she likes). that's a bad idea all together, and she thinks its fine because they help her stay focused. uhmm ya!! if all you focus on, is, them.
but enough of that. got to see my nephew yesterday on webcam. and erin, and joe for a few minutes. but mostly anthony. he's gotten so big!!
life has been pretty hectic lately. i thought it would slow down after i created hell for this boy. but it hasn't. i'm not really used to thinking that i'm going to be a mom soon either. i don't want to grow up so fast. i have my whole life ahead of me, and he just left me here...
cristina was telling me that you don't just stop loving somebody overnight. But the thing is, I miss Killeen so much, I would give anything to be able to go back. It was my escape. And now, there's nothing left for me there, except pain. So I'm not sure why I still miss it like I do, but I would give anything... to feel whole again...