this day i'm better alone, this week i'm on my own
this month i will get by
this year will never die
- epoxies
1) Was 2007 a good year for you?
It was the second worst year of my entire fucking life.
2) What was your favourite moment of the year?.
- sitting with kirsten on her front step, half drunk and starting to feel free - taking off the ring - wandering around philly in the sticky heat - talking to matt on the phone for the first time - the first night i was in my new apartment and felt so good - the emotions conversation with x: "/me licks comfort receptors in your brain" - fighting with people and realizing it doesn't have to be the end of the world - lying in bed saying ridiculous shit with matt - my first gkol show - sitting with beth watching grey's - seeing matt for that first moment and sitting in the airport with his head on my shoulder -
3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
- the crumpled face like a piece of paper in the wastebasket - the most loved voice calling me terrible things - the moment i realized my dearest friend was homeless and how scared i was for both of us, how he'd live, how i'd get by without him - getting asked to leave my job - telling j i couldnt see him anymore -
4) Where were you when 2007 began?
in the tiniest apartment, internally panicking and playing the settlers of catan
5) Who were you with?
dan, rob, and ingrid, none of whom i talk to anymore, sadly.
6) Where will you be when 2007 ends?
i was in my apartment djing on the radio :)
7) Who will you be with when 2007 ends?
alone, but i had matt and calista online with me and x to call on the phone
8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2007?
i dont even think i made one, but i'm sure i wouldn't have kept it...
9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2008?
make decisions that align with my self-care
10) Did you fall in love in 2007?
yes. twice.
11) If yes, with who?
a. and matt.
12) If yes, do they know?
hm. obviously.
13) Are you still in love with them?
not with a. that died around june. with matt, yes.
14) Do you regret it?
no. what's the point? won't change anything, and even if some of it was horrible, i'm still where i am now because of it.
15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2007?
two anyones, yes.
16) Did you make any new friends in 2007?
yes. my x, greatest new friend ever, and matt, who is now much more, but counts in this category two because he's a great friend.
17) Who are your favourite new friends?
see above.
18) What was your favourite month of 2007?
hmmm... hard to say if it's october or december. one or the other.
19) How many different states did you travel to in 2007?
hmm two - IL and PA.
20) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2007?
yes. mike p. friendship withered. and f., although to be honest, i have no idea whether he considers himself lost or not. a huge disappointing failure on my part, a three sentence email on his, a promise of a letter to follow, and nothing, nothing since april. so i would say lost, yes. i needed everyone i could hang on to, but i felt i had no right to say "i need you" to anyone.
21) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
yes. so many. and myself included - i went somewhere very strange and came back completely different but still the same in so many weak ways.
22) What was your favourite movie that you saw in 2007?
have no idea.
23) What was your favourite song from 2007?
"science vs. romance," rilo kiley.
24) What was your favourite record from 2007?
matt gave me kimya dawson's "remember that i love you."
25) How many concerts did you see in 2007?
a fair amount i'm sure.
26) Did you have a favourite concert in 2007?
josh ritter, october 15th at the blind pig in a2, with beth and matt and warren.
27) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2007?
not nearly enough.
28) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2007?
too many.
29) How many people did you sleep with in 2007?
perversely enough, 3.
30) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
yeah. i could have found a different way to rend the world, but i couldn't think of one, so i jumped into the destruction with claws out.
31) What was the biggest lie you told in 2007?
i lied to everyone i knew about an affair i was having. sounds dramatic, doesn't it? oh, it was.
32) What was the worst lie someone told you?
you know, there are so many i don't even know.
33) Did you treat somebody badly in 2007?
i most certainly did.
34) Did somebody treat you badly in 2007?
only if you consider manipulation, lying, ditching me because i was no longer clean enough, ditching me for NO apparent reason at all (mike p), treating me like i was a less than human slut, making me a filthy secret, hmmm, only if you consider those things bad.
35) How much money did you spend in 2007?
too fucking much
36) What was your proudest moment of 2007?
when i realized i hadn't seen a in like two months and i was all right - realizing that i can live without being constantly controlled by someone
37) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2007?
being fired
38) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2007 and change something, what would it be?
i wouldn't change it. i can't anyway, and i am in a place now where i have hope for more than a dead end life and don't feel like a robot anymore.
39) What are your plans for 2008?
get through school, go to WA to meet matt's family and kick it with him and x and my lil c, get my mental health under control, graduate, get out to see kirs and mal and mike at some point, get a real job, go somewhere wonderful, live my life on my own terms, keep myself sane. no more drama.
this year will never die
- epoxies
1) Was 2007 a good year for you?
It was the second worst year of my entire fucking life.
2) What was your favourite moment of the year?.
- sitting with kirsten on her front step, half drunk and starting to feel free - taking off the ring - wandering around philly in the sticky heat - talking to matt on the phone for the first time - the first night i was in my new apartment and felt so good - the emotions conversation with x: "/me licks comfort receptors in your brain" - fighting with people and realizing it doesn't have to be the end of the world - lying in bed saying ridiculous shit with matt - my first gkol show - sitting with beth watching grey's - seeing matt for that first moment and sitting in the airport with his head on my shoulder -
3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
- the crumpled face like a piece of paper in the wastebasket - the most loved voice calling me terrible things - the moment i realized my dearest friend was homeless and how scared i was for both of us, how he'd live, how i'd get by without him - getting asked to leave my job - telling j i couldnt see him anymore -
4) Where were you when 2007 began?
in the tiniest apartment, internally panicking and playing the settlers of catan
5) Who were you with?
dan, rob, and ingrid, none of whom i talk to anymore, sadly.
6) Where will you be when 2007 ends?
i was in my apartment djing on the radio :)
7) Who will you be with when 2007 ends?
alone, but i had matt and calista online with me and x to call on the phone
8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2007?
i dont even think i made one, but i'm sure i wouldn't have kept it...
9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2008?
make decisions that align with my self-care
10) Did you fall in love in 2007?
yes. twice.
11) If yes, with who?
a. and matt.
12) If yes, do they know?
hm. obviously.
13) Are you still in love with them?
not with a. that died around june. with matt, yes.
14) Do you regret it?
no. what's the point? won't change anything, and even if some of it was horrible, i'm still where i am now because of it.
15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2007?
two anyones, yes.
16) Did you make any new friends in 2007?
yes. my x, greatest new friend ever, and matt, who is now much more, but counts in this category two because he's a great friend.
17) Who are your favourite new friends?
see above.
18) What was your favourite month of 2007?
hmmm... hard to say if it's october or december. one or the other.
19) How many different states did you travel to in 2007?
hmm two - IL and PA.
20) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2007?
yes. mike p. friendship withered. and f., although to be honest, i have no idea whether he considers himself lost or not. a huge disappointing failure on my part, a three sentence email on his, a promise of a letter to follow, and nothing, nothing since april. so i would say lost, yes. i needed everyone i could hang on to, but i felt i had no right to say "i need you" to anyone.
21) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
yes. so many. and myself included - i went somewhere very strange and came back completely different but still the same in so many weak ways.
22) What was your favourite movie that you saw in 2007?
have no idea.
23) What was your favourite song from 2007?
"science vs. romance," rilo kiley.
24) What was your favourite record from 2007?
matt gave me kimya dawson's "remember that i love you."
25) How many concerts did you see in 2007?
a fair amount i'm sure.
26) Did you have a favourite concert in 2007?
josh ritter, october 15th at the blind pig in a2, with beth and matt and warren.
27) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2007?
not nearly enough.
28) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2007?
too many.
29) How many people did you sleep with in 2007?
perversely enough, 3.
30) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
yeah. i could have found a different way to rend the world, but i couldn't think of one, so i jumped into the destruction with claws out.
31) What was the biggest lie you told in 2007?
i lied to everyone i knew about an affair i was having. sounds dramatic, doesn't it? oh, it was.
32) What was the worst lie someone told you?
you know, there are so many i don't even know.
33) Did you treat somebody badly in 2007?
i most certainly did.
34) Did somebody treat you badly in 2007?
only if you consider manipulation, lying, ditching me because i was no longer clean enough, ditching me for NO apparent reason at all (mike p), treating me like i was a less than human slut, making me a filthy secret, hmmm, only if you consider those things bad.
35) How much money did you spend in 2007?
too fucking much
36) What was your proudest moment of 2007?
when i realized i hadn't seen a in like two months and i was all right - realizing that i can live without being constantly controlled by someone
37) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2007?
being fired
38) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2007 and change something, what would it be?
i wouldn't change it. i can't anyway, and i am in a place now where i have hope for more than a dead end life and don't feel like a robot anymore.
39) What are your plans for 2008?
get through school, go to WA to meet matt's family and kick it with him and x and my lil c, get my mental health under control, graduate, get out to see kirs and mal and mike at some point, get a real job, go somewhere wonderful, live my life on my own terms, keep myself sane. no more drama.